Difficult week: After my last admission... - British Heart Fou...

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Difficult week

Helly75 profile image
27 Replies

After my last admission I was experiencing considerable pain again , went to hospital & after ecg was blue lighted to Belfast. I was having a stemi and my right artery was blocked. A stent was fitted straight away but unfortunately I went into cardiac arrest afterwards, I'm so lucky I was in a hospital and was given the help I needed . As you can imagine I'm in shock and struggling a lot , new meds & a lot of feelings I don't know what to do with

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Helly75 profile image
Helly75
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27 Replies
Pipedreams profile image
Pipedreams

hello Helly 75,I am sorry you went through what you did ..the anxiety must be horrendous..I hope you’ll get better ❤️‍🩹 soon ..take care of yourself

Helly75 profile image
Helly75 in reply toPipedreams

Thank you ,I'm still very much in shock & very very scared

Tos92 profile image
Tos92

So sorry to hear about your heart attack  Helly75 . It’s very scary when it comes suddenly or out of the blue. I can imagine the anxiety and shock you are feeling is high at the moment. I hope with the new medication regime and advice on lifestyle changes, plus cardiac rehab which I’m sure you’ll be offered at some point, you will help you gain some confidence back again.

I hope you have friends and family for support at this time.

Take care and let us know how you’re getting on.

Tos xx

Helly75 profile image
Helly75 in reply toTos92

Thank you ! I've joined another club now unfortunately. I'm still in shock & very frightened, covered in bruises & afraid to go to sleep incase I don't wake up . I didn't phone any of my family thinking it would be nothing as its been a hundred times before, so I went through all of that alone ,I don't know if I can get over that ,time will tell xx

Tos92 profile image
Tos92 in reply toHelly75

That sounds like a lot. I was on my own for most of my heart attack in 2022 and it really was one of the most anxious moments of my life whilst on holiday.

It will take time, but it is possible to heal from the trauma that this has caused with the right help and support.

Feel free to send me a PM anytime if you would like to chat.

All the best for your recovery.

Tos xx

Im so sorry to hear about you heart attack. When it comes with no warning it's worse as it happened to me 6 months ago.

You were very fortunate to be in hospital and received all the care and attention immediately by the sounds of it so fingers crossed any damage was kept to a minimum.

The next few weeks will be mentally difficult and please make sure you rely on family for support as it helps massively.

Please have a read here and ask as many of us have been through the same, we've been through the journey of doubt, the medication routines and more importantly the road to recovery.

wish you the best recovery

baly

Helly75 profile image
Helly75 in reply to

Thank you so much , we are all in shock still & I'm as weepy as ever . I thought having myocarditis 3 times was quite enough ! The meds are so tough . I was very very lucky on the day & wasn't going to go to hospital at all , I actually scare myself sometimes !

Junehope profile image
Junehope

Hi Helly..so sorry to hear what you ve been going through. The emotional/ mental health aspects of having heart problems isn't talked about enough and impacts.on so many of us and can be really tricky to navigate and cope with.... I can relate to lots of what you are saying and if you ever wanna chat directly please contact me. Sending postive and healing vibes your way. X

Helly75 profile image
Helly75 in reply toJunehope

Thank you ,I'm really struggling, I'm scared to go to sleep I'm annoyed at myself ( I didn't contact any of my family to avoid any distress for them ) so I was alone during it all . Nobody said a whole lot I don't know how I'm supposed to be feeling ,should I be resting?! And I cannot stop crying xx

Junehope profile image
Junehope in reply toHelly75

Hi Helly. What do you feel you need right now? Is it worth having a chat to a couple of trusted people and having a plan to help support you right now. I think talking to the gp and getting a referral for counselling, wellbeing support would be good. As it can be a wait check out with work if they have an employee assistance programme you can access or whether you have any health insurance etc that will help get some emotional support. It is massive what you have been through and are going through and no wonder you feel vulnerable So now is the time to think about how you can get support going forward. Think steps and stages to recovery!

You are not the first.or last person to not ask for help as you haven't wanted to worry people but I'm sure you would want your friends and family to reach out to you if they were .struggling and sometimes we put others needs above ours and it is important that you look after yourself right now. I also found this on line when bhf.org.uk/informationsuppo... too went through a stage of being terrified of sleeping but came to terms with things and listened to podcasts ( anythingbthat helped including funny facts, mindfulness a d audible was amazing in the eve) watched things to distract me and talked it through with a counsellor to understand what the.fear.was about which really helped put things in perspective and accept where I'm at. I also found with time and getting through each night I got more confident and was able to say to.myself' well you got through last night and the night before' and be more aware of my bodily sensations and view them in a more.objective way so I understand them and could report any changes if needed.

To be honest, I'm surprised I am still here and I just take a day at a time now. My dad is a walking example.of someone who is still here and feels.great at 79 and he's had lots of heart issues ( 2 bypasses , valve replacements).and and several near misses prior to surgery so it does instill confidence too)

Please be kind.to yourself and give yourself a chance to recover, heart conditions impact not just physically but emotionally too so please nurture yourself.and reach out to.others to.do this right now to help you move forwards.

Here if you need to talk... you can get through this.

Just as a.side note, every time my heart has started causing me probs again (I had pacemaker several years ago and am recovering from valve replacement and aorta reconstruction) I have to stop to.reframe and recover I pick up a new skill.i want to develop which helps with me being postive and distracted too. In the past I ve learnt to solve a rubik cube, done art and developed cooking skills!

Take care, sending g loads.of.positivity your way!

Don't do this on your own- reach out.....

Xx

Carsry profile image
Carsry

Sending a big virtual hug and get well soon wishes.

I had an Nstemi out of the blue last December, ended up staying in hospital until my double bypass on Jan 29th. Then discharged Feb 3rd.

I feel there's a gap in mental / emotional health care for heart patients as I also felt scared, anxious and tearful. Lean on your family/ close friends , it makes a difference.

I am 4 months post bypass now and thanks to family support, lots of walking in nature, cardio rehab team and meditation I am in a good place mentally.

Take care hun xx

Helly75 profile image
Helly75 in reply toCarsry

I'm so glad you are out the other side of this and feeling well. I'm so scared I can't even explain it properly. I was just put out the door without much of a chat & several different opinions xx

Carsry profile image
Carsry in reply toHelly75

Are you in touch with the cardio rehab team??

Paula233 profile image
Paula233

So sorry this has happened. I'm just about to start work but just wanted to mention that you shoujd be offered rehab (usyally starts a few weeks after your HA) and this will definitely help build up your confidence and give you some support. If you get the offer of doing in person or online, go in person as this is where you'll find the personal support. X

Helly75 profile image
Helly75 in reply toPaula233

Thank you ! They did say I'd get rehab & I will def be going xx

OpenMind1 profile image
OpenMind1

Omg Helly75 I'm sooo sorry to hear you've been through that, that's huge. If you can access any counselling i really think you could do with it. This heart malarkey is a challenge to our heads even more tgan our bodies i think. Thinking of you. Take care. X

Helly75 profile image
Helly75 in reply toOpenMind1

Thank you , if I could stop crying for a minute , I think now I'm home it's hitting me like a tonne of bricks xx

Digger0 profile image
Digger0

Sorry to hear what you have been through, but you are still here.

Heartfairy profile image
Heartfairy

Hello Helly75, so sorry to read your story and how scary the whole situation must have been for you, it’s absolutely normal to feel how you feel right now. It’s always worrying and scary when you realise your body just isn’t what it was and you want your old life back. When I had a NSTEMI in 2022, like you I daren’t close my eyes at night in case I didn’t wake up then when I must have nodded off, I’d wake up looking around thinking wow I’m still here. This must have gone on for 6 weeks so I got some help. I don’t know if you can get some help from your GP (mine offered sessions with a mental health nurse and she gave me some coping mechanisms). I also got help from my cardiac nurse from the hospital and like others have said, get support and regain some confidence from the cardiac rehab classes. I bought books on ladies heart health and became a bit obsessed with heart health but this wasn’t good - I am no expert and reading books and Google made me more scared so eventually I packed them away and now just take one day at a time. I’m 19 months on and still fear for my future so this is very early days for you for sure. Use your friends and family for support and believe me you really do find out who your friends are - the best ones will listen to you, wipe your tears and make you smile again. You are stronger than you think - honestly! You’re still here so once you’re a bit more confident (and it will take time) you’ll feel able to smile again - it will come but some of us just take a little bit longer to recover mentally. Visit the forum but (and I know this may sound selfish but whilst you feel sad, down and scared) only read the good and positive stories. People on here understand as they have walked in the shoes but try and avoid the scary stuff just until you feel ready to handle it. You can do this but just take one day at a time and get the help - you really aren’t alone and help is out there. Take care lovely ❤️🧚🏼‍♀️ xxx

Plum53 profile image
Plum53

Hi, lucky you were in hospital as you say and had the help you needed. Must be a shock ( no pun intended) for you but hopefully you are now fixed and can go on to enjoy your life. A second chance as they say . Mental side of this must be difficult to overcome but you will in time. Best wishes going forward x

Helly75 profile image
Helly75 in reply toPlum53

Thank you so much , we have had lots of shock like jokes in my house recently! Yes mental health is a big hurdle right now xx

Turnipgirl profile image
Turnipgirl in reply toHelly75

When I had blood clots in the lungs back in 2017 it took me ages to regain my psychological health but physically I was fine once I had gone on treatment.

Ewloe profile image
Ewloe

on the 29th of July it will be 3yrs since my STEMI and cardiac arrest and stent. I’d been to the gym in morning, felt unwell ( I’d had long covid and I thought it was playing up), a paramedic did an ecg at home and faxed it to the nearest hospital for cardiac care and they said to blue light me in. Because of that the cath lab was ready for me when I arrested as I arrived there. I did have a very nice near death experience so I’m not left with anxiety about dying but I do now have generalised anxiety along with heart muscle damage and a few arrhythmia’s including PAF. The apex of my left ventricle hardly moves.

I was fit, no cholesterol issues and not overweight. It’s taken me a long time to build back my fitness but I swim at least 2 miles a week, play badminton, do Pilates and walking. These things are all to a lesser degree than before. But I’m here I’m alive and life is too short not to try and enjoy it.

As for the anxiety it started interfering with my life so I went to counselling which did help but with the cardiac arrhythmia’s ( which anxiety can aggravate), and they wanted to avoid anti arrhythmics I commenced sertraline about 18 months after the heart attack. I keep it at its lowest dose and it’s definitely helped.

Your not alone. You can live your life but be patient with yourself. I found it soooo frustrating not being able to do much for a while and having to very gradually build things up. Acceptance of where you are now is a big part of things. So concentrate on the now but know that you do still have a future. One that you can live. Take the medications, I’ve never missed one but so many is a shock in itself. I have 2 weeks of pills set out in daily pill box organisers so I only have to think about sorting them out once every two weeks.

Sorry I’ll stop my waffle. Just be patient with yourself, take a breath your life may be different now but you can still live it. Good luck.

Helly75 profile image
Helly75 in reply toEwloe

I was the same cath lab waiting, the weird thing about my situation is I was in hospital early May, suspected myocarditis for a 3rd time but my angio showed only very mild disease with no blockages anywhere. So within 4 weeks there was a complete blockage ! I've had heart stuff for so long I didn't take it that seriously ,didn't ring my husband or children which then led to me going through this alone . I arrested after the stent & don't really remember much . The meds are awful I'm aching everywhere but I'm here and that's important xx

Farmer63 profile image
Farmer63

Down here in Omagh we have a great six week programme for anyone who has had a heart attack,it's called healthy hearts, healthy minds. It's run by nurses, dietitian, psychologist . They keep in touch by telephone, Skype, amazing people they do so much to see you through the first six week. Maybe you have the same in Belfast,if you have use their services they will help you through issues concerning meds, mental issues, diet and exercise.Good luck

Sunnysummerdays profile image
Sunnysummerdays

Hi Helly75 sorry to hear that you're struggling ATM,the physical side of recovery from heart issues is tough,but after my H.A in 2020 at 59 I found the psychological issues very tough,it's a difficult time for you,get as much support as possible,and as farmer said our hearts,our minds offer great support,I'm from Derry N.I .and attended this group which I found a great help, good luck on your journey,one day at a time 👍

Heart75 profile image
Heart75

Hi Helly75

It was also a massive shock for me I had a heart attack in March 2 stents fitted straight away only 49 and never had any health problems before no high blood pressure or anything i thought I was fit. I’m still scared to go to sleep in case I don’t wake up sometimes I will sit watching TV till I node off. Now getting use to the new norm and hopefully it will get easier xx.

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