Will this get any better?

[Gchar86]

Hi all, I'm new, my husband 38 was diagnosed with heart failure just one week ago. I know its all still new and probably just sinking in still but I ask, will times get better? I feel like he's had the news that he's terminal or something but isn't the case? He's on 3 different meds a 4th to b added and I just see the downside all the time? I'm miserable and making myself ill (I suffer depression n anxiety) everything is always the worst ever when it comes to me. I just wana know if in time things will get easier? Is there light at the end of the tunnel? Ty

[Hidden]

Hello

Yes it will

When you first hear these words it seems like a life sentence and yet as people said in your last post the words heart failure can be misused but anything to do with the heart they put under that term

He is on medications , he will watch his lifestyle they will be watching him now so he is as safe as anyone can be

This is going to take some sinking in and you both have to give yourself time to adjust but you will still have a full and happy life together and you have that security they found a problem and taking care of it x

[Gchar86 in reply to Hidden]

So much better hearing it from other people other than docs n nurses etc thank you. X

[Hidden in reply to Gchar86]

Yes I know what you mean they have a tone and a way of saying things where we are more as we say down to earth

He is going to be just fine enjoy life and make plenty of laughter and memories for when you both grow old together x

[ParrotLover22 in reply to Gchar86]

Yes. I hate that Term 'Heart Failure'. It just means that your Heart needs a little help. Not so devastating as it sounds! Also what BeKind has said is SO right. Your Husband will be fine

[Hidden]

Yes heart failure is a bit of a horrible term. Heart failure is the heart not being efficient. I have not been classed as having heart failure. But when I had my original echo scan my heart had a lvef of 40 to 44 percent efficient. Since being on lisinopril after my mri the left went to 51 percent. Now in the context of everything. A normal ef is a value from 50 percent and can go as high as 75 percent but to get 75 percent you need to be a highly trained athlete. It has been a big shock to the both of you but the medication today is incredible. Now with me the right ventrical it is not efficient, again I have not been classed as having heart failure, as my body, since birth has compensated, however my right side ef is 21 percent. A normal right side ef should be 45 percent or higher. Weather I will improve the right side is an answer I carnt answer. But iam going to try and help it. So I have signed up back with my gym for cardio work. First one today. I see a therapist once week. And my cardiologist has helped me lower my blood pressure with tablets. I am trying to lose weight, and just keep moving. It is hard and it can hit you every now and again but if you can do something to help yourself then you feel a bit in control. Hope you get sorted.

[Blackcatsooty]

Welcome on board.

I have never been diagnosed with heart failure. But I was given just a few weeks to live. And the fabulous surgeons replaced a valve and so , two years later, I am still here.

You will find aspects of cardiac treatment are so much more pleasant than other life threatening illness.

So try to keep calm and to gently guide your other half along the path to recovery

Sooty

[Gchar86 in reply to Blackcatsooty]

Much love to u ❤️

[Smoff]

I'm in exactly the same position, my husband was diagnosed yesterday!I said to him "nothings changed but everything's changed"! We will continue our life but his condition will be in our mind all the time. I am so scared right now

[Gchar86 in reply to Smoff]

Yes thats me. Its totally changed n I'm the worst pessimistic person ul ever come across 🤦‍♀️

[Pitt12345]

I feel for you both. Different diagnosis for my husband . He has had two heart attacks and “a third waiting to happen” which was averted because we chose not to believe what he was feeling was ‘probably indigestion ‘ which was drs comment few months after second ha. and he went for a private angiogram and needed another big blockage stenting. I only tell you this because, like you, I was so very scared. I still worry as I too suffer with anxiety but not as much as the early days. Things will get easier for you, hang in there and reach out and get support when you need it. This site is amazing . Best wishes to you

[Gchar86 in reply to Pitt12345]

Thank u so much 💓

[GracieOS]

yes it will get better.

I was diagnosed with heart failure 4 years ago aged 55. It was an awful experience, I thought I was going to die before my Son graduated university. He graduated over a year ago now. The impact on my mental health at the time of diagnosis was far worst than any physical effects from the heart failure. The meds will take time to work and may need tweaking several times to get them right for your husband. Mine where tweaked or changed several times. I went from an EF of low to mid 30s to around 54 (bottom of normal range). It took about 2 years to get there with improvements each time I was tested. I was discharged from Cardiac services about 18 months ago into the care of my GP. I still worry and am currently waiting for a check up, an echocardiogram, to ensure things are still ok. That niggling background worry doesn’t go.

The good news is I live a pretty normal life. I’m in Europe at the moment with my husband. We have been hiking in the Pyrenees, the Swiss Alps and along the Italian Coastline, the Cingue Terre, with very steep paths the climb. I’m slower than I used to be and I struggle up hills more than my husband, but I do make it. I need rest days, whereas my husband doesn’t. I’ll be 60 next birthday, a birthday I never thought I’d see when I was first diagnosed.

[Gchar86 in reply to GracieOS]

Wow that's amazing. I so hope we're the same thank you 😊

[NervousWife]

I understand completely where you are coming from. My first post was very similar to yours back in July when my husband has his heart attack and stent fitted. Quite frankly I was terrified about everything. I found even food shopping was a traumatic experience, I was so convinced that if I bought one item of food "wrong" it would cause another heart attack and all be my fault. The responsibility of caring for him felt huge.Now, three and a half months on, my husband has still stopped smoking and we've both made huge (and necessary) changes to our diet. He is back at work and things are almost back to a new kind of normal which we are both adjusting to.

I found the kind and supportive words of this group to be absolutely wonderful at the time. You get very different opinions which helps you to see things from all sides. Many replies were very gentle whilst one was very realistic explaining to me that my husband was a grown man and could take responsibility for himself - he made me understand that my role was to support my husband's choices through this terrifying time not to wrap him in cotton wool and watch him like a baby!

My husband still finds taking so many tablets the hardest thing to cope with but he understands that along with massive lifestyle changes, they are keeping him healthy and he is slowly coming to terms with them.

There is so little support out there for the partners/families of people with heart conditions, but I promise you you'll find it here and things will get better.

Take care of yourself as well as your husband.

[Gchar86 in reply to NervousWife]

Just wot I needed to hear thanks so much xx

[Paulhawkeye]

hi.. I had quadruple bypass and told my Ef was 20% nearly twelve months ago now .. the medication and care that the provide today is excellent and will certainly help. (Heart failure)is just the term they use for your heart not functioning properly ,I’m sure he’ll be fine .. I have a consultation after Xmas to see if my ef has improved any . If not the will fit a pacemaker to help me , so there’s lots of options that are there in place if needed ... good luck and good health 👍👍

[Gazzer83]

Hi, It does get better but it is really all about mental attitude. I had my first HA at 39 and will be 59 in 2 months. Having had 7 HA's and still here. It really is all about how you approach it. You can wallow or you can say no and get on living. Trust me. Been their got the T-Shirt and the Hoody. Best wishes.

Gazzer.

[Hidden]

Yes and no.So many factors depend on it. Recovery is a roller coaster ride every day. You have to find the balance but most importantly stay positive and keep moving. Eat as best as possible.

Iv gone from having a 12% ejaction rate to 45% but still get chest pains everyday and some days absolutely wiped out with bad aniexity on the verge of callimg an ambulance. Other days i walk around and think wow its gone, im cured. Its crazy. Im same age too. I was fittest man around prior to this. So yes it can get better and it can get worse. Ultimately itll get worse, i mean we all die anyway and this condition usually goes downhill but you can slow it and even reverse it for a while, especially being his age. Age is on his side. Diet is everything. Moving around and walks are everything. Get a dog if need be. Itll be the healthiest move youll do. But most importantly is to stay positive as much as you can. Get PIP and finances sorted asap too. Dont delay. Then enjoy each and every day where you can. Good luck

[Gchar86 in reply to Hidden]

Ah wow love the honesty. Will defo take this all aboard thanks so much

[Ellie-Ann]

when I first saw heart failure on my echo report I was taken aback and started to think the worst. LUCKILY THIS FORUM IS ON LINE because I soon found out that that term does NOT mean a death sentence! The medics use it just to say there’s something wrong but as others on this forum have told you, medications now and advancements in treatments mean you can still have a happy and full life so please forget you ever even saw those two words. It’s like putting ‘sick’ …it can mean a lot of things really.

Start thinking positive now. Keep something in front of you that you are looking forward to and try to get out of the house and do the things again that you love doing, just be careful.

Good luck. Once you’ve processed everything you will be fine.

Ellie Ann.

[uzininemm]

Hello Gchar86, I know exactly how you feel, when I was informed with no initial explanation I thought I had days left to live.

16 months on (so I am still a relative newbie) with the right meds, right diet, fluid restriction and exercise I am still here and have a decent life (as have others said).

I know its only early days and your husband will be in good hands but things do get better.

One thing I would say is when you do see the medics again is if not offered ask about your husband being referred on to a heart rehab programme, it is something that is worthwhile.

[Gchar86 in reply to uzininemm]

Yes hes been referred so just waiting on them calling

[Jetcat]

there is light at end of the tunnel yes. Don’t make your self Ill with worry,easy said than done I know.! I’m sure you and your hubby will have a long time together. My sister inlaw was diagnosed with it over 5 years ago and is still going strong. 👍

[irishwife93]

Gchar86 i know how you feel, my husband was diagnosed just before his 40th birthday after having a severe heart attack completely out of the blue. Our lives changed overnight and we spent a long time feeling sad, scared and grieving for our old life when he was fit and healthy. Fast forward 6 months and I can say our relationship is the strongest it’s ever been. This whole experience has brought us closer as a couple and every day we wake up together I feel so grateful he is still here. At the beginning I spent all my spare time googling and researching heart failure and how long my husband would live for, it drove me mad and was not helpful at all. Now I try not to think about the future as no one truly knows what’s around the corner and you’ll drive yourself crazy trying to predict it. It takes a long time to get the medications right and the care setup but heart failure is manageable, it’s treatable and it’s not a death sentence like it sounds. People live a long time with heart failure and there are new medications and treatments coming available all the time. Try not to worry and know you’ve got a great community here for you when you need it. If you need someone to speak to please reach out to your GP. These diagnoses often hit the partners and family members very hard and having to be strong for your husband takes it’s tool!

[Gchar86]

Thanks so much. It's nice knowing I'm not alone n knowing someone in the same boat as me is just getting on pushes me to do so too x