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British Heart Foundation
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Not working and feeling guilty

Hi guys

I suffer with dilated cario myopathy and ventricular tachy amoungst mental health issues and I feel guilty that I dont work.

I dread anyone asking me what I do. My partner works and I try to keep the house tidy when I can, usually in the morning because I feel drained come the afternoon. yes I am a house husband.

I look fit enough, only aged 49 and can walk somewhat but feel completely useless.

I do have hobbies and try to mentally keep active.

Also I think that one tablet I take, Rampril, causes my whole body to painfully ache quite badly.

Take care


4 Replies

I know what you mean. I've gradually reduced my hours over the last couple of years and now only do 16 hours a week in my job. I know this is the right amount for me to be doing and I feel so much better for it, but it does make me feel a bit...useless at times. I just try to remind myself that I'm choosing to work less in order to feel better and that actually I'm achieving a fair amount all things considered. At the end of the day, you know best what you can and can't do and you shouldn't feel bad about it, it's important to look after yourself. Good luck :)

1 like

Never feel guilty about genuine ill health. You can only do what your body allows. Do not let yourself be judged by others they don't matter your family are the important ones. I am sure they would rather have you stay at home and be with them than push yourself to more illness or worse. Just keep yourself busy with whatever you can manage


Have you thought of voluntary work. For instance doing two or three hours a couple of mornings a week in a charity shop. Also getting out for those few hours could be beneficial.


Thank you to all that have read and responded.

Yes I used to do voluntary work and am thinking of returning to it.


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