to her self ...

b) low motivation cannot manage her list

c)misreading texts from her daughter setting trigger

d) she says the reading positive thing yet the negative thought jumps out

these thoughts makes her anxious

e) she over process any one know how to deal with these

f) how we would find a group with her condition

g) what medication are ppl on so we can try to see if the doctor will give her help

she thinks the valium isnt ok she wants

Please any links etc i have been on the austic web page

12 Replies

  • v v v brief as on way out...

    breathe deeply

    and try to absorb the fact we are all the oneness

    we are on our own journey + its not the same as everyone else's

    and it is not necessary to get triggered.....

    valium can help in short term but Drs don't like to prescribe because is v v v addictive i.e. people don't want to do without it but it is chemicals, and long term, they do more harm than good...

    im on no medication (last i tried , Olanzapine, was absolutely 100 x worse than being me!)

    fact is we don't have a problem, it's how we/others relate that is the problem if there is one

    suggest medical herbalist, body therapy, person-cented counselling etc etc.

    (see most my other posts on here and in dyslexic action)

    hope that helps for now

  • Asperger's Syndrome as it was known until recently, is now classified High Functioning Autism (HFA). I was diagnosed "Asperger's" in 2012 at aged 38, after many years of confusion and strife.

    The main benefit to this diagnosis is in understanding oneself, and being able to explain why and how you are different (no better or worse) than others. It is not an illness, just a way in which some peoples brain's are; a certain type of person. We have different strengths and handicaps to the Neurotypical person. (Eg: personally, I have a high IQ, but I am also terribly clumsy and forgetful!).

    The diagnosis can help with understanding, that is all. GP's are very often not up-to-date with issues surrounding Autism, as it is not strictly a medical condition. It may, more rationally, be considered a learning disability though. As far as addressing other issues such as depression and anxiety, (which are common for "Aspies", most probably just because of the way in which our society is built around the Neurotypical way of existing) there are anti-depressant and anti-anxiety treatments available. These can occasionally do more harm than good, but a well informed individual will seek out what is best for them.

    I take flouxetine for depression & anxiety, and maintaining a very healthy routine (gym, diet etc.) really helps with my mental health and ability to cope with what is quite a difficult existence in this NT (Neurotypical) dominated world.

    I think it's most important not to see yourself as a victim or use a diagnosis to excuse yourself from trying to engage with people, whilst equally one needs to be kind to yourself and forgive yourself and others for not always understanding each other.

    I must say that my experience with Venlafaxine was horrendous, (nausea, vertigo, etc), however different treatments affect individuals in different ways.

    Hope this helps somewhat :)

  • For clarification: Asperger syndrome now comes under the single umbrella term of autism spectrum disorder (ASD). So if you have 'mild' symptoms of Asperger's, you could be considered a High Functioning Autistic (HFA).

  • thank you so helpful Tomas very helpful

  • Thank you so much for telling your Aspergers syndrome experiences, I have a brother, he is 76...yes 76 and I am convinced this is what he has suffered with all his life, you describe it so well...thankyou. He has lived in the Midlands for 40 years, physically he is having problems now and we have persuaded him to move south where we grew up as children. He has been down here for nearly 3 months, in a lovely warden controlled ground apartment. This has been so stressful for him, I have dealt with it all, but he is struggling mentally and emotionally. He was so on his own before, but since here has joined a church (big part of his life) Two choirs, and does Age concern luncheons, so really trying and doing very well, he is just so negative and depressed. Myself and the lovely lady warden are helping him so much, he is quite desperate at times. He has never been assessed for his mental health, except for depression, I am seeing so much of his problems since he is living near to us now.

    Dealing with new kitchen appliances are a huge problem, mobile phones etc....but he was a teacher, with a high IQ, travelled the world with a choir, Russia, Australlia....but it wasn't easy...always a panic before he went.

    Wish you a happy life...the concerned younger sister

  • very greatful thanks

  • Hi

    I have Asperger's Syndrome myself and these are the things that help me with depression and negative thoughts:-

    1. I take anti-depressant medication - Venlafaxine - 2 x 75mg tablets per day

    2. I see a counsellor on a weekly basis

    3. I have learned how to regulate my breathing via the counsellor and listening to a relaxation CD


    4. I try and avoid situations with too many people that I know I will not enjoy

    5. I try to keep my mind occupied so I don't dwell on my thoughts; for example I will always

    listen to the radio if I am awake in bed or getting ready

    6. I try to eat a healthy diet, avoiding white bread and junk food as much as possible

    7. I don't drink alcohol

    8. I try to exercise when I can on an exercise bike - I find it hard to motivate myself to do this but

    feel a lot better when I exercise on a daily basis

    I can recommend the website 'Wrong Planet' -

    and there is a UK-based Asperger website called 'Aspie Village' -

    You can search for support groups via the National Autistic Society's Autism Services Directory:-


  • Yes, I used to rely on alcohol as a social lubricant, this became a terrible habit. I too don't drink at all now. I thought it would be boring, but I am is so much more self aware now, that I don't even want to drink.

  • I used to do the same when younger but don't go to pubs and clubs any more so no need to drink, plus alcohol wipes out the effect of my anti-depressants as it is a depressant so harmful to me. I have the occasional glass of wine on special occasions but generally don't miss alcohol at all.

  • so great ful thank you

  • My husband and my former foster son have Asperger Syndrome. The foster son was finally diagnosed when about 27 years old but had spent many years worried about how he felt. He thought he was developing Schizophrenia like his birth mum or that he was gay because he could not relate to females. My husband was diagnosed when he was over 60 years of age!

    My foster son finds a Vegan diet is best for him as he got severe headaches from eating eggs. My hubby is sensitive to many different foods and substances. When there was a strong smell of creosote he was sitting rocking to and fro and waving his fingers in front of his eyes! Alcohol, even just the smell of it, makes him feel very odd and he acts strangely. He's best not having peppers or spices as he becomes more obsessive and keeps checking everything.

    You might find that you are affected by certain things too. It's worth checking, especially if you find things look worse at times or other people ask you why your behaviour has changed. Or if you have severe reactions to certain medications. There is a good method of finding out, called Muscle Testing. You can learn about it and then use it yourself to check individual things on the spot.

    The Dr of Psychology who finally diagnosed my husband said that he is not illogical (as I thought) but has a different kind of logic! That really helped me to get on with him. He is a gifted person musically but can't change a light bulb or work out a simple problem. Everyone is different and some of us required more help than others.

    All the very best.

  • In my opinion there is very scant resources available for adults with a late in life ASPERGERS diagnosis. Most of the issues you describe are issues all people face not just those with an Aspergers diagnosis. Social isolation is a big factor in the development of the symptoms you are seeking help with. Also the symptoms could indicate someone under unreasonable amounts of personal stress and on the verge of a breakdown. Of all psyciatrists medications I have put in my ASD brain, Lamotrigine off license use worked best as a mood stabaliser (need a private psyciatrist to prescribe this) and caused no side effects but the SSRIs (prozac & seroxat to name a few) made my mood issues worse and may not work the same way in a non neurotypical brain. I'm not medically trained but I'm a clever Aspie.

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