whats wrong with me?

hi all, i am worried that i have a problem. I am fine when i am around friends or family and find i only eat the same as them although i never really feel full. However when i'm on my own i find that i have episodes of continuous eating and not fruit either!!! it happens more if i have had a bad day at work or if i'm upset. ive always been an emotional eater anyway but now i cant seem to stop! like yesterday i had a stressful at work and i came home and ate 7 time out bars for no reason i wasnt even hungry i also had a mcdonalds, a packet or 2 of crisps, a hot cross bun (as there was only one left) and loads of chocolate digestives. i ate all this in my room when i was on my own, and ive hidden the evidence in a bag under my bed.....i do this a lot. i then cooked dinner and ate normally with my partner.

i find that i tend to go to the supermarket and buy packs of doughnuts, packs of chocolate bars, fizzy drinks, packs of cookies, crisps, popcorn etc and eat it all before i even get home. my car is full of wrappers of chocolate bars that i picked up in the petrol station....and if you looked in my boot you would be shocked at how many bags i have full of containers from what i've eaten that i've hidden for months.

once ive eaten until im almost sick i get a rush of emotions. normally guilt and shame and i feel disgusted in myself i cant understand why i let myself do it but i cant seem to keep control. it makes me so sad which then makes me turn to food again, just typing this now is making me want to head to the shops....

i have tried lots of diets but nothing seems to work long term the urge to eat seems to win every time :( i just want to know whats wrong with me and what if anything i can do to stop it. Please help if you can....i've never shared this with anyone before so its been difficult to post. thanks in advance

Laura

2 Replies

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  • Hello :) I think it's brave that you posted this. In my opinion I think you should probably see a GP because them feelings of guilt sound hard to cope with and they'd be able to support you and prevent it escalating further as eating in private until you feel sick and hiding the wrappers are signs of an eating disorder ( I'm not medically trained so I'm only going off what I know the signs to be)

    Best wishes x

  • Great you've recognised you have a difficulty - suggest a visit to your GP - these thoughts and feelings and your relationship with food need exploring with a ED specialist - you may need to push for help - but a referral to an ED centre with counselling to explore the problem would be good idea - ABC website has information - also you could ring/email them to get some advice. Good luck.

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