Thousands of men have never been heard.

[Darryl]

From twenty years of patient advocacy, I'm close to declaring that many doctors buy in to pre-disposed stereotypes and don't bother to engage in meaningful consultations with their patients. Am I wrong or is it time to change this. What are the stereotypes and cliches and bigoted ideas about men that boil your blood (or, that you just notice and move on from)?

For examples:

Most men love watching sports

Most men won't see a doctor

Most men don't talk about their feelings

Regarding post treatment impotence, most men are more concerned about their masculinity rather than the basic enjoyment of orgasms and mutual intimacy of sex

Most men have a high tolerance of pain

Most men won't cry

Most men are married

Most men resist digital rectal exams

[cesanon]

"2 of them were brought up for Peer Review, about their inter-reactions with me, and in final analysis, of their Peers these Doctors were suspended from practicing within their institution"

[cesanon]

I think most of them practice medicine out of a recipe book, but that is sort of driven by institutional and economic forces. It's hard for most not to do this if they want to practice at a top hospital.

And realistically, most stereotypes have some basis in reality, that's why most people use them. Of course that can be deadly in a medical context, can't it.

[kaptank]

Well asked! I think each of us should insist on some kind of treatment plan, in which we have a significant say, in consultation with our medical advisors. This is easier said than done. In my case I had a good general medical practitioner who insisted on a plan. But negotiating with higher levels in the industrio-medico complex is another matter... We do need for it to be fully understood that when all the shit has been thrown at the fan, it is our lives here and at this stage, we should be calling the shots.

[kaptank]

Maybe subject to economics! (etc)

[Toad1]

Darryl, you overlooked: “Prostate Cancer is so slow growing that you will die with PC rather of it.”

[Darryl Partner]

@toad1 Thanks for your note. My "List" is not total....I just posted some examples. I want all of you to suggest others. Focus on falsehoods, stereotypes and nonsense regarding men vis a vie prostate cancer. I want to debunk them all. For example, "men" think the digital rectal exam will turn them into gay men. Well, that one is homophobic, sexist, heteropresumptive and just plain dumb and offensive to all of us. Yet, within the last year, I heard an MD say that, and, racistly, he was being specific about African American men. It's this kind of stupid thinking and speaking that I want to reduce among our doctors, so that more men will be heard.

[Hidden]

My wife's reaction is always in regard to bedside manner. I couldn't care less. If I want sympathetic conversation I talk to myself. Say, how 'bout those outrageously high medical costs?

[monte1111]

Well when I went in and seen I had a female MO I was a little stunned. So guess it works both ways. So, Nalakrats is driving people out of state, and a while back suggested I go to Cuba. I am starting to see a pattern here.

[PhilipSZacarias]

All of the above to varying degrees. Every doctor is different. The biggest beef I have is the insensitivity or lack of empathy of some doctors and the lack of patience and time to explain the disease and the therapies. I have encountered very good, patient and empathetic on one side and impatient, superiority complex and irritable doctors. Phil

[j-o-h-n]

Most men cheat on their spouses (of course not from personal experience 😉).

Good Luck, Good Health and Good Humor.

j-o-h-n Thursday 01/24/2019 7:05 PM EDT

[Hidden]

I have fired a couple of doctors on my journey. I won't be treated like just another patient. Some doctor get angry about having the patient participate in treatment discussions. These are the doctors that need to be retrained.

[Moespy]

Darryl,

Here is how I stack up to the list.

Most men love watching sports

Yes!

Most men won't see a doctor

No!

Most men don't talk about their feelings

No!

Regarding post treatment impotence, most men are more concerned about their masculinity rather than the basic enjoyment of orgasms and mutual intimacy of sex

No! to masculinity

Most men have a high tolerance of pain

Yes!

Most men won't cry

No!

Most men are married

Yes! (twice, didn't learn the first time)

Most men resist digital rectal exams No!

I find myself in the middle. Somehow I always end up there.

Thanks, Jim