The one who just can't wrap her head around it.

[mazzafrass]

I'm so lost and confused, everyday I'm in pain. Doctor's they still haven't given me a full diagnoses. They say conversion disorder, they say fibro. I'm so lost. I feel like a fail to everyone I've been dealing with the pains in my body for going on three years. I don't think I can rake much longer of not knowing what's going on with my body. With I don't have strength to walk. Why I sometimes have tremors. Can anyone here lighten up my mind a little. Make me have faith and hope that everything will be okay again. I had the biggest chance of a life time. I missed out on top model bcuz I had a fall down the stairs and ever since I haven't been the same. I can no longer walk without braces so tight on my knees and legs its cutting of sirculation. I used to be the one everyone came to, now I'm the one everyone runs from. I used to be so happy and active. Looking myself in the mirror kills me.

-the one who just can't wrap her head around it.

[mazzafrass]

Wow really can tell I can't spell at the moment.

[Hidden]

Sounds like fybro

[Valerie1]

It sounds to me like everything has gotten so on top of you that you are in a state of depression, this will have a major effect on every other aspect of your life. Please see a Doctor and get treatment for this, you are not a weak person for being depressed, it is a genuine illness. Mental health is as important as physical health and taking medication for it is no different to taking any other medication, whether it is pain killers to anti-biotics.

First thing I'd like to encourage you with is there is always hope: of a cure, a lifestyle change that may help, a diet change that works for you, something or someone which will brighten your day. The one thing I've hung on to since my diagnosis is that a positive attitude makes all the difference to the quality of life I can expect to have. I try to make a positive difference to everything I do.

I'm English, so I'm not 100% sure of what you mean about wearing braces. I think you're referring to something you wear on your legs(?). If they are so painful and uncomfortable don't wear them. If possible find something that suits your need better, if they were prescribed by a medical professional go back to them and tell them you need for them to provide you with a better design or fit.

Those of us with fibromyalgia and/or other invisible illnesses get up everyday and battle on. Getting a Fibro diagnosis won't make the pain go away, it just gives a name or a reason why things are the way they are, somehow we need this validation that we are not imagining all these weird all encompassing symptoms.

I'm so sorry to hear about your fall down stairs, that must have been awful for you. I have fallen so many times, usually breaking or damaging tendons in my ankles, (wrists or elbows) and the initial shock to my system puts my blood pressure up for days and apart from the pain I feel physically ill. I get so cross when people ask what type of shoes I was wearing when I fell, as if to say 'what do you expect in those silly shoes'. I usually stump them and say 'flat, sensible shoes, not like yours' ;-).

I don't know how you can make your own personal adaptations, no one asks for illness or disability but it's the way we live with it that makes us stronger. Looking at all the disabled Para-athletes at the Paralympics in Rio inspires me. Some of them were born with their disability, others were extremely fit, vigorous people who suffered horrendous injury through war or accident and they've had to pick themselves up and become the people they are now. Different but victorious. I hope you can find your inner stronger person and become someone you are happy to be.

[Hidden]

Write your symptoms and how you feel down everyday for month or two then take to your drs thats what i had to do after she asked me to,then she says infront of my daughter who was there last time,i dont need to read your pain diary!i got another dr who did read my diary and diagnosed me with fibro,hope this helps.