I wish my husband would get off his backside and do something. He never exercises (I can't he says) he does absolutely nothing. Gets up in the morning with my help, goes downstairs with me carrying everything. Sits down for the rest of the day, get me this and get me that then goes back to bed with me carrying everything, water, tablets, oxygen, nebuliser. He is literally wasting away, his muscles have gone I have to do everything for him. He is making himself worse, the physio told him, use it or lose it so he is losing it. I sometimes wish it was all over as living with him is a living hell, there is no love left as all he thinks about is himself. The physio told him whilst he is using oxygen his body parts are protected so there is no reason to worry about getting out of breath, breathlessness is making his lungs work and as long as he is using the oxygen he can push himself, it will be uncomfortable, but he is making things harder for himself as his legs are wasted and cannot hold him up properly. He has GOT to exercise.
I just do not like being with him anymore and it takes me all my time to want to talk to him, I now begrudge everything I have to do for him. If he would try, things would be different, but he won't. If anyone rings him he says I am fine, when anyone comes to see him he is the life and soul of the party, then when they go it is back to get me this and get me that.
I was changing his oxygen the other day (he won't do it) and he started telling me how to do it, I don't know why because he has not got a clue as he has never changed one. I picked up the empty cylinder and I could have hit him over the head with it I am so fed up of him.
Even our children are fed up with him and have no sympathy because he won't do anything. I think he is lazy and likes being waited on hand and foot. He won't even walk a couple of yards to get something, i.e. a book or CD, he calls me.
I have started spending time in our front room now as I cannot bear to be in the same room as him as all he talks about is his phlegm and the gunk on his throat. He never, ever covers his mouth when coughing he says he can't. He said to me the other day, how long did I think he had left to live, I told him if he didn't change his ways, not long as I would cut his bloo##y throat, that would make breathing easier for him.
Anyhow, have a lovely Christmas, we are on our own this year as our children have made other arrangements, I have cooked Christmas dinner for nearly 50 years for them and now, the first Christmas I don't, we are on our own. Lovely isn't it.
I think I may just go to bed for the day and pretend I am ill so I can have a rest.