Feel more mentally disabled than usual

[Jengirlmama]

I feel like I’ve been more mentally ill or disabled than usual. Maybe its my recent cyclothymia diagnosis or maybe its isolation lack of structure insecurity of trying to find a job fear of getting burned out again difficulty with pharmacies etc. my children’s mental health issues. Being used to not going anywhere. I no longer want to go anywhere more and more. I feel so many invisible walls in front of me. Problems sleeping and sleeping in. Some of this time at home has been great for self discovery and time with my husband, but in ways I feel more mentally handicapped. I’ve had times when I have felt like a very capable woman even very intelligent and talented, perhaps it was inflated hypomania. I dont know. Maybe the agoraphobia is just a new habit brought on by the virus. Laziness? Finding a job after a burnout or difficulties from anxiety and feeling low or burned out can be very scary. Make me feel insecure. But I now see it has been a pattern brought on by being bi-polar and ADHD without treatment for many years. Now I feel like my bigger problem is bi-polar, not ADHD. Racing thoughts obsessive compulsions, staying up late with no focus, unable to focus even with meds anxiety, feeling defeated feeling low, at times trying to take on the world and biting off too much. Tons of guilt and beating myself up. Being wiped out when I get home.

[Aspiegurl]

I hear you... (((HUG))) Personally, I am worn-down and BURNED THE HELL OUT. But... What to do??? In the age of "no easy answers" and "suck it up Buttercup", I guess I just "keep on - keeping on" until I have a better plan of action. Honestly, I am WAYyyyy past all the yoga, long walks, grounding, meditating... I'm just "past that", I guess? Don't get me wrong - those things DO help - some. But... It's kinda like the stress and constant barrage of ca-ca is overwhelming me, you know?

[AllTimeLow in reply to Aspiegurl]

BURNED THE HELL OUT. Me too.

[Kevash]

It can be very scary feeling burnt out and low and then having to think of job hunting when your mind is all over the place (wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy)

Guilt, anxiety, OCD, Depression, low self esteem, anger all these things are manageable when they happen maybe 2 at a time but all of them at once is just hellish.

Do you find it difficult to focus on a task? I’ve found it really difficult without obsessing/ racing thoughts x

[AllTimeLow in reply to Kevash]

You're right about it being hellish. It is hellish. Please be well.