Hi everyone. I cannot go into details here but I am not ok.
I feel in need of some sense of caring and you have always all been wonderful.
Pity Post: Hi everyone. I cannot go into details... - LUPUS UK
Pity Post
Written by
CecilyParsley
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156 Replies
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Take care. Always here if you want to message, chat or call.
Sincerely Kevin 💜
Thank you Kevin ❤️
Virtual Big hugs coming your way Cecily. It’s ok not to be ok. ❤️🫶💐xx
Thank you so much Chris xxx
thinking of you CP, glad that you reached out xxx
Bless you thank you xxx
Sending love 💜Gentle hugs🤗🤗and a couple of 🥄🥄Cecily. Thinking of you 🤗💜🌈🦋 xx
Sunflower
Thank you Kat. I just needed some kindness xxx
oh hunni . Just seen this . I am so glad you’ve told us you’re not ok . Please please reach out to Samaritans if you feel like you can’t talk to anyone . They are fantastic , don’t judge and just let you talk . You’re so precious , we all love you 😘. You will get past this and you aren’t on your own xxxxx Tiggy sends you a pat on the head
Thank you and Tiggy too. I cannot say things out loud so this safe space is wonderful. Xxx
It’s good to let others know you aren’t OK, well done!
If you want to chat, please do. I’m here xx
Thank you so much xx
Glad you reached out but of course concerned about you. Know you have friends and lots of listening ears no what the situation.
💐🌺🌸🌹
Kay
Thank you Kay, I was in desperate need of a kind word. Life is harsh currently and for once I don’t know what to do or where to turn. I usually know what I want. Xxx
Sometimes the best thing to do is to just take a breath and do nothing for now. Sending love xx
Thinking of you CP and sending you love & strength to get through this. ❤
Thank you so much xx
I've not been around here very long, but have found people to be great support too. Sending love & best wishes and hope you're ok. And if you feel worse, please reach out, whether that's on here, private message (that's me included) or like Tiggywoos says, the Samaritans or professional help ❤️
Thank you so much xx
Just look at all these wonderful messages of support CP! All these people care about you and what you are going through. Try to use that to give you strength to keep going - and you will get through. We are all rooting for you. xxx
Thank you. I am struggling so badly. Hard to acknowledge but true xxx
sending huge cuddles and my very best wishes.
Take your time, but we’re here if/when you want to talk.
🥰🥰🥰🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
Thank you so much Neg xxx
💖💖💖💖💖🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
Meg oops. I am having to type left handed 😫 xxx
Oh noooo 🥲
Bless you 💖💖💖
I’m always free for a chat if you wish xxx
❤️ Xxx
you’re not alone , we’re all here, we all understand, we’ve all been there , we’re all thinking about you and wishing you better times. Tomorrow is a new day and things will be different, maybe not better but different so use all these hugs to keep you safe today and if you need more tomorrow there’s plenty more here CP xxx
Bless your heart. Thank you so much xxx
Sending a big virtual hug ….always if you would like to chat 🫶💕
I really do appreciate your kindness thank you xxx
Hi CecilyParsley Sorry to hear that you are not OK.
Sending you huge hugs and lots of love ❤️ xx
Thank you so much xx
🌷🌻So sorry to hear you are not ok. Sending you virtual hugs. Never feel alone as you can always turn to here. Always reach out. Take care xx🌺
Thank you so much xx
It’s very very tough not being OK and I’m glad people like you have the courage to say when you’re not. Please know that this will pass, bathe yourself in what makes you feel better and above all keep talking.
Wishing you lots of wellness xxxxx
Thank you Rosa xxx❤️
a morning hug CP 🤗
Thank you Stills. I managed to sleep three hours last night so that is a bonus 🙂 xxx
Afternoon tea then a nap due x
Sounds good to me xxx
Afternoon hug CP 😉🤗
Early morning hug CP, hope you are feeling brighter today 🤗
Morning Stills. Thank you, not sleeping a lot with pain but I am going to my pottery class today and will have to try and paint left handed 🙈😂. I will have a laugh with the ladies..the best pain relief. Thank you for asking. I hope that today is good for you? Xxx
Enjoy the pottery and you may find your left hand makes even better pots snd things 🤣
Coukd not be worse to be honest 😂😂😂
Oh my darling. You've told us now and we care. Looking at your responses, all I can offer is my grandma's words.
' if you don't know what to do, do nothing'
You are such a kind lady, we see that in your words on here. When chatting with you I feel like I'm sat on the sofa with you having a cuppa. Not many folk have that warmth.
Much love x
Oh that is so kind of you to say and means the world right now Bonny thank you. I always try to be kind but sadly recently kindness in my own life has been lacking. I rarely ask for help, I just needed some kind words, no judgement, no advice, no criticism and I got it xxx
Hope you are OK, thinking of you x
I am getting there Bonny thank you for asking. I hope that you are doing ok? Xxx
Good girl!! Pleased to hear it. I'm ok thank you x
Thinking of you and always know we are here for you regardless of the distance, Cecily... lots of love and hang in there, please... xxx❤️❤️
I will, your wonderful posts made me smile for the first time in days. I needed it and you all took the time to make me feel better. Thank you so much xxx
I've seen your posts CP in the past. Know that there are so many people who care and are thinking of you. xx
Thank you Lulu xx
So sorry to hear you’re struggling, sending you my very best and like so many others on here love and support.
Thank you Pippydo xx
It’s good to talk and that’s what you’ve already done my lovely ❤️ keep us all updated 💐🌸🌼🌹🪻hugs sent to you xx
Thank you so much xx
Sorry to see this. Please take care. sending a hug. xxx
Thank you Pinky xxx
Sending you a big Scottish cuddle 🥰. It’s ok to be not ok. X
Scottish cuddles are just like Welsh Cwtches so thank you xx
Lovely CP 🥰🌿🌹
Hi my sweet friend. I’m so sorry you’re struggling so much hun.
I’m not able to interact with your posts like I used to, but I have seen the many posts you’ve written and know you’ve been through a lot.
I have always been across the pond with you in spirit thoughts and prayers sweetie. Most of all I really do care about and love you so much.
Try to feel my loving supportive hugs and this reply when you are struggling especially.
I keep you in my prayers…and I just ushered a special one just now hun.
Please take care and never give up lovely.
I love and care about you so much. 🤗🤗🤗
EvaJo/EJ 🤗♥️🥰🙏🕊🌿🌸🦋
🌿🌹🌿🌹🌿🌹🌿🌹🌿🌹🌿🌹🌿🌹
💕🤗💕🤗💕🤗💕🤗💕🤗💕🤗💕🤗
🌈☀️🌈☀️🌈☀️🌈☀️🌈☀️🌈☀️🌈☀️
🦋🌸🦋🌸🦋🌸🦋🌸🦋🌸🦋🌸🦋🌸
💐🌿💐🌿💐🌿💐🌿💐🌿💐🌿💐🌿
♥️🥰♥️🥰♥️🥰♥️🥰♥️🥰♥️🥰♥️🥰
You are so lovely. I felt the hug and the warmth and care and it gave me comfort. This space is such a blessing to us all. We share good and bad, happy, sad and hilarious because we understand the issues that the world at large doesn’t. I am trying to pick myself up again. Thank you for the kindness and love, it means so much. In my situation everyone has an opinion, judgement or criticisms but really all I need to help me up is the kindness I have here xxx
I am always here for you. PM me anytime lovely.
Hugs and kisses.
EJ 🤗♥️🥰
Thank you xxx
It is ok not to be ok. Well done for recognising that you are not ok. Even bigger well done for reaching out to say that you're not ok, as today, some of us on here can be ok for you and you will be ok for us when we're not ok at some point in the future. So now all you have to do is recognise that in yourself and be like you would be to your best friend when they feel like this; so be kind, gentle and listening and acknowledge. There doesn't necessarily have to be a reason. Even wrap your arms around yourself and give a big hug. You're welcome to a very big and warm virtual hug from me btw. Peace, love and light. Namaste 🙏 P.S. I always light a candle and look to my symbol who is an elephant called Ganesha - the overcomer of big obstacles at times when I feel like this. For me as a yoga teacher, it just helps a teensy bit. Also Julian of Norwich, "This to shall pass!" Oops, P.S. overtaken everything, so once again, Namaste 🙏 xx
No need to reply and make more work for yourself 🙏
I have to reply because I am grateful that you took time out of your day and your ill health to try to make me feel better. It has worked. I have read each comment and smiled or cried but happy tears, tears of relief that there are kind people in this world and I am so grateful to be a part of this wonderful group.I can no longer be flexible enough for yoga, indeed I do get on the floor quite frequently but sadly never on purpose lol. I also need a raiser cushion to get me up. I did try Mindfulness but it just wasn’t for me. This crisis is actually not physical or mental health related but it has knocked me flat. My mind is a jumble of conflicting thoughts and of course sleeping is almost impossible. I will get there it might take some time though xx
Morning. I hope today is slightly brighter for you. However I hope your impression of me particularly as a yoga teacher is not too skewed. I'm not the standing on head, om-ing, meditating, perfect pose kind. In my head I am, but in practice, today, I'm teaching my chair yoga to an average age of about 70. My yoga for me is very slow, almost restorative. To be honest, I feel, it's the only, now, authentic part of me so I'm fighting for it, for as long as I am able. As you obviously know, us Lupies are good at fighting in so many different ways. The way you're feeling is part of the fight. Anyhoo, I'm off to yank myself up by the bootstraps, and bend some old ladies about because today, I can. There is no shame when you can't. Btw, the old ladies know I'm bending them. 😉 Sending you peace, love and light for a better day and tomorrow. Namaste 🙏 😁
Ha ha that is so hilarious, I have images of old ladies being bent into a downward dog, needing a crane to be lifted 😂. Good for you for doing something you love and helping others in the process. I am getting there thank you xxc
michaellasmithAdministrator
Good morning Cecily,
I am so sorry you are not feeling okay, please do call the national office on 01708 731251 if you would like a listening ear, a chat or some advice.
Take it easy ❤️
Warm regards,
Michaella
Thank you so much michaella. I really appreciate the offer but my not being ok is not AI related for once. I just had nowhere else to go for the sort of kindness I desperately needed. It sounds pathetic but is the honest truth xx
Hi Cecily,
It is not pathetic at all, sometimes just knowing people are out there ready to listen and support you, makes all the difference.
Keep us updated on how you are doing ❤️
Michaella
Thank you Michaella ❤️
When life gives you lemons, make a gin and tonic! Hoping you got a good night's sleep.Dont forget, "This too shall pass."
Thank you I really hope so xx
Keep reaching out. People genuinely care about you. You are very important in this world. Lots of love from me and my little pooch! Xxxxx
Thank you Monica. It really has helped I had started to believe that I was useless, worthless and a burden which hurt me so much as I spent 27 years as a Social Worker trying to make a difference. Xxx
So sorry 😞 to be reading this, I am sending 🙏 you so much ❤️ and catches, bless you xxxxx
Thank you so much. Cwtches are the best sort of hug xxx
Sorry for the typo, I meant cwtches 💜💜💜
Sending you lots of love and hugs dear Cecily❤️❤️ xxxx
Thank you so very much xxx
Oh Cecily, you are always the first to offer support, love and your wonderful cwtches when somebody needs them, so it is sad to see you need some care and kindness when you are such a caring and empathetic person. I‘m far from the first (late as ever) but I offer my love, support and healing hugs while you are down for whatever reason to one of the kindest people I’ve come across. We are all here for you lovely Cecily. You are in my thoughts and prayers. 💝🙏🏻🤗😇🌸💜 Xxxx
That is so very kind of you to say. I wish more people were like the wonderful folk here. Real life is so hard sometimes and I sit and wonder what on earth did I ever do to have no one in the “ real world” who gives a damn about me. When someone tells you often enough that you are pathetic, stupid, useless, worthless and a “ sucker of joy” you start to wear those badges. I have been getting sadder and sadder lately and my health issues have made everything so much more difficult. I am trying very hard to hold my head up but it is the hardest thing I have ever done. Thank you so much for the support, it really does mean so much xxx
I totally understand how you feel Cecily. We have no children and the closest family members and friends have all passed on. I also feel that nobody gives a damn about me and I worry how I’d ever manage if hubby goes before me. Not pleasant thoughts but we have to be realistic. But here on this site we do feel cared for and folk like you are SO kind and offer warmth and love to those feeling down. As you say I wish there were more folk around like those on here - especially you. You are a special lady Cecily and I wish we lived near to each other. What a laugh we’d have and we could exchange our wonky crafts/pottery to make each other smile. I’m sorry to hear about your health issues and mine has been lousy this year too. Hoping I’ll be able to tolerate a lower dose of MTX injections and that they will help me get rid of this on-going lupus rash and other symptoms Sending you sympathy, love and more hugs with the reminder I’m thinking of you. 💕🤗🙏🏻🥰xxx
I am so very sorry I never even asked how the rashes were. My head is cotton wool currently. Is there any improvement? It must be so painful for you. Big Cwtches love and sympathy back to you. My last creation was a highland coo. I was so pleased with it until I got it home and Neil said what is it 😫l Neil managed to smash my Little dog I made too. I was gutted as they are the only two things that I have made that looked anything like they should do in my opinion lol. I am working on painting my version of a carriage clock at the moment but I have missed a few weeks due to my health. I am looking forward to going this week. Whilst I cannot achieve much with my poor hand I miss the ladies there, we have a good laugh and put the world to rights, we have Even gone out for lunch which I organised and was a disaster but even that made us laugh. I am supposed to be organising a Christmas lunch out for us, not easy with three vegetarians, one meat eater, one pescatarian, one doesn’t like Indian, another doesn’t like Chinese 😬It will be a Big Mac at this rate. What are you working on now? Thank you for making me smile not easy lately and my frown lines are entrenched. I need a Lotto win and I would buy a hotel somewhere quiet by the sea and everyone coukd come and stay fir free so that we coukd all meet up…pipe dream I know but it is good to dream xxx
Sounds a wonderful dream Cecily. I’d be there like a shot! 😉 What a shame Neil broke your pottery doggie 😫 and didn’t recognise the Highland coo. 🤨 But it is great you meet up occasionally with your pottery group outside of classes. 👍🏻 That’s going to be a real challenge for you organising the Christmas lunch with so many diet restrictions. Might be easier to hire a village hall and have a ‘bring our own’ lunch with tea/coffee made at the hall.😆 I’m working on a multi-coloured crocheted throw at present. It looks pretty until it is opened up and then you see how wonky the sides are - in and out all the way up and down. 😂 I’m just sewing in the ends and crocheting a border around it. Hubby says “it looks warm”, but “it looks lovely” would have been nicer. 😉 So it will be one we just use at home and won’t be given to anybody as a pressie I’m afraid.
My rash keeps reappearing every time I get below 12mg Prednisolone. It isn’t painful in the slightest, just itchy at times, but shows I’m still in flare. ☹️ At least now the rash is restricted to my hairline, behind ears and scalp. But I can’t stay on steroids for ever, especially not at 12 mg, and having been on them since February yo-yoing and tapering between 30mg and 12mg Rheumy and Dermy want me to try MTX injections. I started a month ago on 15mg jabs but after the 2nd developed awful side effects. So I’ve had a 3 week break from them and will start 10mg jabs on Wednesday to see if I can tolerate it better. Fingers crossed because I don’t want to have to go onto torpedo-type pills of other steroid sparing drugs with my GI problems 🫣 and I’m getting sick of the puffy face and undyed hair! But apart from a few other on-going symptoms I’m not too bad and am still walking around the block I posted a while ago!🤣 That keeps me fit!😉
Enjoy your pottery class this week and keep smiling. I hope we get to see your carriage clock when finished. Love and hugs.💜🤗 Xxxxx
I do hope the 10 mg works for you. I will post my wonky clock when I finish it. At least with a clock face you can recognise what it is eh? Huge Cwtches, you have made me smile twice today thank you so much xxx
Thanks for your kind wishes Cecily and I hope you are feeling a bit better today and that whatever was the cause of bringing you down is resolving. Looking forward to seeing your wonky clock when finished. I don’t think I’m brave enough to post my wonky throw, although if it raises a laugh it might be worth it. 😉 Take care lovely Cecily and huge hugs back to you. 🤗💕xxx
I am getting there thank you, my head is raising slowly. It will take time I think. In pottery we all love the things each other does, even if the potter is less enthusiastic lol. We made them, spent months on them and when we finish there is always a small celebration. You would be surprised at how well your work will be received you know.I could not in a million years cast on, knit, crochet. My Nan who was an excellent knitter dubbed me “ cack handed” and she was right . Let me know how you are getting on xxx
So pleased to hear you are slowly improving. 👍🏻👍🏻 My lower dose of MTX is delayed yet again - wretched cold came back with a vengeance this morning - shivery and high temp - so won’t be starting MTX tomorrow after all.☹️ It further delays tapering and coming off the steroids which is a nuisance. Yes, like you and your pottery pals I love the items I knit/crochet/sew even if not up to standard. They are fun to make and keep me occupied, so that’s the main thing. If they look great that’s a bonus. 😆 I’ll send you a few pics. Xxxx
Thank you. I look forward to seeing them xxx
I sent them just after writing above. Hope they arrived. 😘x
.. I am so so sad you are feeling like this, please know I am thinking of you & if I could make it better I would
.. take care lovely lady sending a huge hug 💕🩷xx
That really has made it better thank you so much xxx
I am sorry that you are feeling like this. Sending you positive thoughts and lots of gentle hugs. Xx 🤗 ❤️ 💐
Thank you so much xxx
Sorry you're feeling you've hit the floor. It's a real struggle dealing with what we have to and not knowing where our illness or the complexities of life in general will hit next. Cling on to the hope that there ups and downs and you sound like your due for an up. There is a small community of fellow empathisers here even if no one else understands in the big wide world, we do. xx 💜💙
So very true thank you so much xxx
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Oh no!I haven't posted here in quite a while, but I just had to respond to this. Sending love and hugs, hoping you will be OK, and all my most positive thoughts are winging their way to you. Much love. X
just reading your message & my heart goes out to you. It’s hard to say “ I’m not ok.” Well done for reaching out. Life is hard & sometimes it just just feels better to say it out loud. Putting on a front is bloody exhausting. Send massive hugs & I’ll add to that collection of virtual spoons 🥰 xxx
That is wonderful and gratefully accepted. Thank you so much xxx
I am so sorry that you are struggling, jus t reaching out to everyone was very brave, so well done. If and when you feel up to it, maybe you can seek some counselling.in the meantime keep reaching to us. I am sending you lots of virtual hugs.
Thank you Lily. I honestly do not need counselling I just need life to give me a break. I am not responsible for not being ok. Hopefully I can get more care hours which will really help me but kindness is what I needed and I got it here in abundance. I am very grateful for that xx
I am so sorry that you are struggling, jus t reaching out to everyone was very brave, so well done. If and when you feel up to it, maybe you can seek some counselling.in the meantime keep reaching to us. I am sending you lots of virtual hugs.
Hey Cecily. We all get that feeling sometimes. That’s when a good comedy. A nice ‘chunk’ of cake & a cuppa. I love to sing jazz. So i put on Nina Simone or Ella Fitzgerald on my tablet. (Instrumental) & i sing. Or i wrap up & go for a walk. I felt low yesterday. Went for a walk & there was a guy playing drums outside my local Sainsbury’s. He was great. It really cheered me up. Hope you feel better soon. Good luck x
Hope you feel bit brighter today 😘well done for getting out for the walk xx
Hi Vixen, oh I agree with you. My dogs bring me sheer joy. I love them so very, very much. I love to walk too but for me it is a huge struggle. I normally walk with two sticks, mostly for balance but now I can only use one because of a hand injury and it just isn’t safe for me. As soon as I am back out with my boys life will be so much brighter. I am so pleased for you that you managed a walk and listened to the drummer. Littke things mean so much. You take care of yourself too xxx
Thanks Cecily. As i’m getting okder (52). I find i like the autumn more. Great walking weather. Walking is so tiring. My joints ache alot after. But it’s really worth it. Hope you can stroll with your furry friends soon. Take care. X
I understand only too well. I used to walk miles and miles and loved it. I miss it so much. We have a dog walker now and he takes my boy out with up to 11 other dogs, running, jumping, diving in puddles, it is amazing. Each day he sends me beautiful photos and videos and I live vicariously through those. I had a eureka moment about two months ago where I managed to paddle in the sea with Finlay. I laughed, I cried it was so beautiful xxx
Finlay
What a beautiful boy!! I love dogs. (Cats too). But i’m a dog person at heart! I lost my lovely mum 6 yrs ago. Miss her so much. We went to a lovely old hotel in Norfolk the last Christmas before she died. Wells next the sea. With a village green. Gorgeous food. Loads of dog owners & their dogs. The dogs & owners had a separate dining room. The dogs were allowed to eat at the table. My mum & i were in the bar 1 night & a guy asked what breed of dog had she come with? & my mum paused. Said ‘my daughter!’ We all laughed!
I’m going through the menopause. Having horrible hot flushes, feeling emotional. Massive mood swings. I miss asking my mum’s advice. She was 82 when she died. The dreaded c word. Died within 2 months of us finding out.
Oh I am so very sorry for your loss. The loss of your Mother is huge I know, I lost my Mum aged 62 from cancer when I was 26. I miss her every day. She loved my dog Crockett, my first cocker spaniel. He came everywhere with us.It sounds as if you have such wonderful memories but when you feel emotional memories cannot hug you. Are you getting any support with the menopause? I went through it at 40 after my hysterectomy and I wish I had had the care I needed as I ended up with relearned UTI’s and vaginal atrophy. Have a chat with a professional who can advise and support you. Always here is you need a chat and I send you huge Cwtches ( Welsh hugs) xxx
Aah. You’re lovely Cecily. Thank you. You’ve had some health crap too! I don’t come on this forum as much as i used to. I lost my dad when i was 17. (He was my age now 52). He had a massive heart attack. He was a Journalist for the BBC. Left home to go to work. I never saw him again. My mum was a nurse. Went to the police to report him missing. Spoke to an awful policeman. Couldn’t be bothered to take my dad’s details down. Or even his car’s no plate. A dog walker found him, alone in Epping Forest. He had angina. His meds were left in the car. Because of that crappy policeman. He was left in the morgue for 5 days. My mum made a formal complaint.
Then i got married at 21. 6 months after. I started getting the most awful pain in my joints & left eye. Went to a&e. They kept me in for 5 days & told me i had RA. I found out i had an STI. I had been a virgin until i met my then husband. (Divorced 3 yrs later). He was the first man i’d ever slept with. I caught chlymidia from him. But as there aren’t any symptoms. We had no idea. We had a row. But i believed him that it was before he met me. I was 21. Hobbling around on sticks like a 90yr old. I had RA in every joint. Plus my eyes. The Iritis was so painful. All the injections in the eyes & steroid drops. Steroid tablets, anti inflammatories. I was so ill. Felt awful. My lovely mum was a nurse. She’d finishing nursing her patients. Then come home & nurse me. Such an emotional time for all of us. I still get emotional thinking about it. So i’m so grateful for the NHS & my INFUSION!!!
PS. U went through the menop quite young 40. UTI’s are horrible. I had cystitis last Christmas. I felt so ill. It really knocks u out. I nearly had a kidney infection. Thank God for antibiotics!!! You sound like a very kind woman Cecily. You’ve cheered me up. Thanks. X
Oh my goodness I cannot imagine how awful that was for your poor Mum and for you to not see your Dad again. Sadly some public sector workers should never be in the job, others are dedicated, compassionate and stay in your mind for life. My Father walked out when I was four, he had gone bankrupt, days later my Mam and I were evicted with just what she could carry. She brought me up on her own but loved my worthless Father until her dying breath. He was a cruel, selfish man who had so many affairs and only ever saw me as blackmail to my Mam not to take him to court for maintenance. He drove a Jaguar, holidayed abroad whilst my Mam put newspaper in her leaky shoes to ensure I had enough to eat. She was a wonderful, kind, funny, beautiful woman so I was blessed.
I am so very sorry to hear about your husband. STI’s are not always apparent until they cause damage. Of course you believed him. You have suffered a lot of emotional trauma in life. I hope now found happiness and peace?
Talking always helps me. It is only when you speak to someone who listens without judgement that you can make sense of things. I am always here. Be kind to yourself today xxx
Aaah Cecily. You’ve had a traumatic upbringing. Your dad sounded like a very selfish, arrogant man. We were very lucky to have such such strong, loving mothers! I hope your dad didn’t put you off men all together? There are some kind, loving men out there.
I’m hungry. The weather’s grtting greyer & colder. I think this is soup ‘weather’. Take care Cecily. You sound kind. Just like your lovely mam. X
Thank you I like to think I am like my Mam. Soup weather indeed it is freezing out today. Look after yourself and wrap up warm xxx🥶
You defo sound kind to me & to all the other ‘forumers’. You wrap up too Cecily. Get a nice warm stew on the go! Take care. X
Veggie chilli for me. Enjoy your stew xxx
👍🏼👍🏼
Hey Cecily. Me again. (Soz). I read your post again, about paddling in the sea. Must have felt wonderful. Really free. I’ve got a friend that had a health scare. The evil c. But thank God it wasn’t. She’s 62. Really loving life at the mo. She’s very independant. Goes on holiday alone. She went to Hastings recently. Stayed in a lovely Edwardian hotel right opposite the sea. We were laughing about her getting a ‘post menopausal’ swimming costume. (So a sack basically). But she didn’t care. She’s very descriptive when she writes. Very witty. She explained how since her ‘scare’. She never takes a moment for granted. Lives life to the full. AS WE ALL SHOULD. X
What a wonderful outlook on life. I wish I was that brave. Good for your friend. She sounds like a fabulous positive person to have around xxx
She helped me emotionally when my lovely mum died. My friend liked her alot. Xx
Hey Cecily. I’ve been trying to upload a pic of my lovely Sidney. But the bloody thing won’t send!!! Anyway. He’s brown, big ears & a lovely white chest. Big twinkly eyes. Looks a bit like a mole. HeMs my 7th hamster. They’re all so funny!
Oh what a shame. He sounds gorgeous 😍 xxx
Dear Cc, My prayers and peace that surpasses all understanding are with you in this time. Sometimes we all need the worlds hugs, and peace. Sending all my Love, and blessings for your days ahead, as these things too will pass. Bunches of cyber love, The stormy sunshine Xxxxxx
sometimes we all need a hug
Thank you Stormy . What a beautiful photo of Storm too 😍. Dogs, laughter and hugs are the best of medicine aren’t they? This lovely safe community has lifted me with kindness that I so desperately needed. I am bowed but not out. How are you doing? I send you huge Cwtches and lots and love and woofs and slobbers from Finlay and Skye ❤️🐾🐾
Finlay and Skye ❤️🐾🐾
Dear Cc, those babies are just soooo ADORABLE 🥰 I may say this often, but every time I see them, huge smiles for miles or kilometers over the pond there, lol.... This community, is just as you say, loving, caring, safe, and so very supportive to us all. Sunshine on a rainy day always. I have so much going on here, I don't know where I am most days. Sweet spotty has been my rock, even with all she is going through, a truly dear sister, one I never had. I hope you pass this hardship season you are enduring there dear Cc. I pray for you and the many here every night. That is my promise to you, and I try my best to support everyone here..Our roads are long and twisted, so our fur babies are our horse's pulling us up, and always true on the paths we must take. Thank you for the huge Cwtches, and love, anf for sharing sweet Finlay, and cutie Skye. You take care of yourself, and they will always also dear one. Bunches of loving licks back to you.xxxx. The Stormy Sunshine 🌻
thestorm. What a beautiful dog. Keeps you warm in the winter i bet! I only have my chunky little Syrian (hamster. Sidney) to cuddle up to. He’s not very affectionate. He just puts up with me. Eventhough his meals come to him. He never has to use the bus or tubes. He never has to go out in the rain. Everything comes to him! But he still makes me laugh. X
Thank you Vixen, Storm is our love, such a unique dog. We had no idea what he was when we rescued him.He just loves people, we share him with everyone we can...That's his purpose in his minds eye. If I were not so unhealthy, I wanted to take him to visit the people who have no one here, in homes for the disabled. He keeps me very warm and loves to snuggle 🤗. Sidney, although a Hamster, is a great company and companion I bet. You can say or share anything with him, and he'll never tell lol .. I think they are cute....To be waited on hand and foot, our pets have it made, don't they.....All of nature's creatures are special, and all have purpose. I love nature....and all the good people here.Take care, be blessed, peace and love to you for all your care here. Love, The Stormy Sunshine 🌻
Do share a new photo of Sidney. I would love to see him xxx
My funny little hamster in his fav vase
Cecily, you are so far from useless and you are a bringer of joy (not a sucker of joy!! 😠) . You also bring compassion, insight and care - all priceless qualities. Just look back on this thread and see how many people you have cheered up in the process of reaching out for help. No one here feels that you have taken anything from them or spoiled their happiness - quite the reverse.
I can imagine the type of person out there in the world who has used language carelessly or cruelly and triggered these feelings, which cut us deeply as we have bodies which we are no longer in the driving seat of. I bet many of us here have received such treatment and have got to feeling hopeless and hurt at some point in our journeys. They are the ones who are lacking, however, not you.
I hope you are feeling a little better now (sorry I'm late to this thread). I'm also hoping that you can manage something small that makes you happy, that you get back to your pottery soon, and that you enjoy planning the Xmas meal with your friends.
I was about to say shut out those negative voices, but actually on reflection, why don't you just stick up two fingers (on your good hand) the next time someone makes you feel that way. Terribly rude, I know, but probably feels a lot more satisfying at the time 😁😆🤣🤣.
Sending virtual hugs and warm wishes to uplift you 🤗
Ha ha you made me giggle, also priceless. A two fingered salute is perfect. You are so kind. I used to be a different person before becoming sick, someone who would have poured scorn on the sheer cruelty of the words repeatedly said by the person I love the most. But now I have begun to believe it to the point where I was actually considering going to Dignitas nkt to be a burden anymore. I guess it will take me a long time to find the real me again, to not accept what is being said and find my worth again but I am trying. This hub is amazing. Thank you so very much for taking time to make me feel better. It is appreciated more than you will ever know xxx
It's difficult when something is said repeatedly because the repetition itself pushes the message into our brains to some degree whether we want it there or not. Hence the effectiveness of advertising!!! So we are all vulnerable to that process as humans and the fact that you are feeling the effects of repetition is definitely not your fault.
I don't normally go in for the affirmation type thing, but I do wonder if repeating positive statements to yourself can help counteract the negative words? Or keep re-reading the positive messages you have received in response to this thread. Obviously, those negative words should not be spoken in the first place!
Does the person telling you these things understand the impact their words are having on you? And that they cause you pain and stress, which in turn will only make you physically sicker, not stronger?
Some people (entirely wrongly) behave in bullying, accusative ways when they actually feel powerless themselves. Far easier to strike out at you and call you the problem when actually it is the invisible , unknowable, uncontrollable illness that is the problem. You know the person saying these things best and I wonder if you think there is an element of this going on with them?
If so, any chance of getting them to talk to a professional about it? Could be a G.P. or carers support group etc. depending on their relationship to you. What's paramount is that you do not continue to be treated that way.
There are people I have to stay away from now because of how they view me now I'm as ill as I am. My heart has been broken over again because some were close friends and others are family members, and many are people I have helped (and one still do help to my own cost) in their hour of need.
Others are friends of my partner who have been shamelessly pass- remarkable without actually reading up to get any proper factual idea about my conditions and the pain and limitations they cause. It's caused pain to my partner and not just to me because these are his lifelong friends from childhood and he now feels conflicted.
I understand the impulse to sometimes feel your suffering and confinement has reached a pitch where it would just be easier for all involved if you just didn't exist anymore BUT PLEASE DON'T EVER ACT ON THIS FEELING! It will pass, and you have all of us on this forum to support you, appreciate you and cheer you on.
And another thought - next time in your pottery class, maybe you could make something dispensible to actually throw at the wall yourself should the urge arise! 🤣 Or train your lovely dog to recognise offensive phrases spoken to you and reward the speaker with a nip? 😆 Ah...the possibilities are endless, if only in my head ...
Hang on in there 🤗🤗
Ha ha another giggle, my Finlay would lick someone to death. Strangely I am nkt depressed just tired of everything ( except my dogs). I think you are very perceptive and the low self esteem thing and it is so hard to not respond but if you do it never resolves anyway. I am so sorry that you and your partner have friends that are that insensitive. My once best friend told me “ no offence I just cannot deal with illness”. It is a good job I didn’t have the same response when he became paralysed five years later. He asked why are you being so good to me when I neglected you for years. I told him because we are friends. Strangely we have the most bizarre conversations now about incontinence pads and accessible restaurants and hotels lol. Odd how life turns out isn’t it? Xxx
Yes life is capricious and unpredictable. But there's just another example of how wonderful you are- you stick by your friends, you stay true to yourself and your values. That takes real strength 👍
I totally agree with you Hoofprints. Cecily sounds lovely. The type of person you would go to for comfort & good advice. Someone with empathy & warmth. (Just how my lovely mum was). X
Oh CecilyParsley, I am so sorry you are going through this. Sorry for my late reply, I have been on a 1-week online sabbatical. I know what it’s like to go through recurrent episodes of not being OK. We’re here for you, as always. I’m so glad you reached out to us here when you felt like things were overwhelming. Please keep doing that, as much as needed.
Thank you so much xxx
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