Sorry but I have to rant…: This is a... - Fibromyalgia Acti...

Fibromyalgia Action UK

59,469 members66,515 posts

Sorry but I have to rant…

PenelopeClearwater profile image

This is a long post, so I apologise in advance. I’m absolutely at the end of my tether with the NHS - I’m exhausted and in pain all the time and I just expect some level of care from medical professionals in my local surgery and from NHS England, but instead they’re causing me so much stress and upset 😤😢

I am so so angry at my 🤬 GP surgery. I had an appointment with their physio in January, to “help” with my chronic pelvic pain. During the appointment, he asked about back pain and I said I wasn’t sure if it’s related to the current pain, or due to bra pain as I have a large chest. He was saying how good it is that I’m so flexible - he’s a physio, so I didn’t think anything of it. The pain is in my lower pelvis and hips, so the stretches he was doing on the table were placing me in a vulnerable position… again, not a problem - he’s a physio! While I was on the table, we chatted about the fact that I can’t work because of all the pain and exhaustion etc. I’m a classroom assistant for a reception age class at a primary school (4-5 years olds) and we chatted about the physicality of the role not being practical for me right now… So when he’s printing off some exercises for me (because he diagnosed it as a muscular problem), he said out of the blue that I could earn money selling my farts online (apparently it was in the news that week) so again, I let it slide and just brushed it off saying I don’t fart. I figured that would end the conversation. THEN he said “you’ll just have to embrace the boobs, then… or some women sell their underwear online - you could do that” I was mortified and sarcastically said “right, so the kind of work suitable for a woman” and he then said “actually a colleague has a sister who rates penises online - you could do that for money! I do t know how these women make more money than me and I have 3 degrees!” I just got out of there asap, feeling bloody mortified!

Friends and family all said it was sexual harassment, I’ve had sexual harassment at work in the past and it’s never taken seriously. I’ve also been in abusive relationships, so I’m cautious these days - but I don’t expect this kind of thing from a medical professional.

Anyway, so I reported him to the GP surgery. At first, they cocked it all up and sent me an email from him explaining to me that he’s never had a complaint before and he was just joking around, but that he sees it as a good experience because he won’t do it again. He also said it’s a shame I won’t see him anymore because he accurately identified my problem and thinks he could help (he didn’t identify it at all). I know about harassment law and some health and equality legislation, so I checked their policies online and they are at least 14 years out of date, as they all referenced government legislation from waaaay back and most of their policies had a 2008 date on them.

I replied that their response was awful and I was not happy. The GP managers and senior partners then took over and agreed with me that it was totally out of order, the Practice Manager had not followed proper complaints procedures and that they would review it asap. They reviewed it. They met with me and assured me they were taking it seriously. Then I had a letter from them saying he’s got a written warning and telling me that it’s my fault they didn’t follow procedure because I apparently requested that… which was a lie.

So… this week I contacted NHS England to complain about how awful their policies are and the fact that they do not treat patients with respect. I got an email back today saying they can’t help me because the complaint about the physio has been dealt with by the surgery. So I’ve had to send ANOTHER 🤬 email explaining that they clearly didn’t read my complaint and that it’s about the way the place is run.

I know there’s a pandemic on, but this is just pure horse💩

Ok, sorry - if you’ve got this far, kudos… I just needed to rant, otherwise I’ll scream. 😅💙

Written by
PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
Read more about...
34 Replies
desquinn profile image
desquinnPartnerVolunteerFMAUK Trustee

I have dealt with complaints (not always directed at us) within the charity and as part of the process I try and ask the complainant what they are hoping to achieve. I know you are venting but it is always good to take a step back and wonder what it is you are wanting to get out of this and what the cost in energy or effort will be.

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to desquinn

Thanks Des

I got the very same advice from citizens advice, so I’m very grateful.

I have outlined what outcomes I’m after… but they have not read the email properly 😅

The surgery is currently working with out of date policies and are unaware of the Equality Act 2010 and the NHS constitution, so I’ve raised it as a problem with NHS England, as the surgery aren’t bothered about it.

I won’t be like a dog with a bone, I just find it so frustrating that the buck is always being passed.

Nesterlom profile image
Nesterlom in reply to PenelopeClearwater

Hi there,

I am shocked to hear what happened to you at your physiotherapy appointment. This is unacceptable and is serious misconduct on the part of the physiotherapist. The Health Care Professions Council (HCPC)is the regulatory body for Allied Health Professionals including physiotherapists. Their role is to regulate the profession and protect the public. I would strongly encourage you to contact the HCPC (you will find info on the web). They will take this very seriously and investigate. It is unprofessional, breech of the codes of conduct - and needs to be looked into. I am so sorry you have gone through this - and I am very shocked - I hope you can take this forward as this is not okay.

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Nesterlom

Thank you! I have taken it to the HCPC now as well. It really helps to have this feedback, as their reaction has left me second guessing myself

Arymretep profile image
Arymretep

Good for you for making a complaint , his behaviour was totally out of order , I’m glad he’s given you an apology and he got a written warning, though I don’t understand why the surgery said it was your fault that they didn’t follow procedure , as Des says you have had an apology from him , but if you aren’t happy with the way the surgery handled it, you can take it further, good luck

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Arymretep

Thank you 💙

Piddlysmam profile image
Piddlysmam

Wow, that sounds like a horrible experience. I don't blame you for being angry, it sounds like they didn't want to take any action at all. Good luck with your complaint, don't give up. It takes courage to stand up for yourself in this way. Nice rant, I managed to read it all. 😀

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Piddlysmam

Thank you - and well done 🤣

chicolini profile image
chicolini

What a total creep! He sounds like a right slimeball. Hopefully his next victim will slap his face and call the police. That's what ld do.

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to chicolini

🙌

Whiteclouds profile image
Whiteclouds

Hi so sorry to hear you had such a bad experience you did right by reporting the physio he was extremely unprofessional with you and the surgery too. I recall many years ago I was much much younger then and naive I had a physio visit me at home as my leg had been in full plaster for a long time and he told me if I did not kick my leg up further he would kick me up my big fat arse . I reported him to my care workers at the time who defended him said he was a lovely man . So I reported him to my surgery and he never came again. After that I got an ambulance picked me up and took me to hospital for physio. The NHS cover up when it suits them.

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Whiteclouds

100% for an organisation that supposedly places patient dignity at the top of their priorities, they definitely cover their arses…

Spider1 profile image
Spider1

Well I tell you what, GOOD ON YOU for taking this further.Absolutely disgraceful and disgusting.👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Spider1

Thank you 💙

Sally444 profile image
Sally444

Wow, what on earth is wrong with this guy??? What a weirdo! The fact that he mentioned 'embracing your boobs' and 'selling your underwear' is sexual harassment and you should not have to put up with that. I would definitely report him as goodness knows what he'd do to somebody else that was more vulnerable. I would write to the surgery and tell them that if you don't get the response you want (and in theory, he should be investigated) that you would be very happy to speak to HCPC and post it onto social media and speak to your local MP etc.

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Sally444

All this support is definitely helping me keep going with it - it’s draining when you keep being gaslit by your own GP

BlueTofu profile image
BlueTofu

Absolutely appalling.

Cristianaldo profile image
Cristianaldo

You MUST report this to the Society of Physiotherapists! I went to a physio and he started massaging me inside my thighs and my lower abdomen, despite me saying it was my upper back. Later I went to my Chiro and she asked if I had had any problems with the physio as someone had been made to strip naked and he used to watch women undress by the cunning use of mirrors! He was struck off but still practiced privately from his mum's house. Where in the country are you? Sounds like coercion as well. He should be banned.

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Cristianaldo

That’s appalling! I’m in Essex and I don’t believe for a second that this behaviour was a “one off accident” or “totally out of character”, like the GP kept saying. I’ve reported him to HCPC… just hoping they take it seriously

Daisydrawing profile image
Daisydrawing

Hi Penelope, This is absolutely shocking and gross misconduct. I totally agree with the comments Nestalom and Cristainaldo wrote. He needs to be reported to the Society of Physiotherapists and struck off. He has broken serious codes of professional conduct. Well done for perserving with this, though it must be absolutely draining to pursue. You need an advocate to help you. At the hospital they have PALS, (patient advisory liason service) not sure if it includes the GP practice. Keep us updated. I hope you are able to get more support with this.

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Daisydrawing

Thank you - the support here is just amazing 💙

Broadfield profile image
Broadfield

Is the apology, the written warning and the fact that you will not have to see him again not enough to clear up the situation. Stress is not good for your condition so being angry will make you worse. It's a shame it has caused so much angst.

Midori profile image
Midori in reply to Broadfield

I understand, but good on you for reporting him, Maybe it will prevent someone else from being harrassed,

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Broadfield

The apology wasn’t a real apology to me - it was a “sorry you took offence to what I said”, which just means “I didn’t do anything wrong and you’re too sensitive”

A real apology and a genuine written warning would have been enough, but the way the rest of the staff have behaved, the fact that their policies are all out of date, and the fact that I wasn’t allowed to see their disciplinary procedure, all lead me to conclude that real action has not been taken.

I also worry that he will just go on to behave this way with other clients - potentially younger and more vulnerable than me. I have let things like this slide in the past because I was too naive and scared to say anything - and then other things happened/continued.

I won’t continue to the point that I get too stressed… I think I’d be more angry with myself if I didn’t at least ensure my complaint has been genuinely taken seriously.

But I definitely see what you mean about getting myself too worked up over it and he isn’t worth my health ☺️💙

Ladame profile image
Ladame

This is atrocious ! The behaviour of the physio was totally out of order. Well done for complaining. They should have a complaints procedure to follow and train their staff to use it. Either another staff issue or training issue. No excuse regardless of Covid. Best wishes

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Ladame

Thank you - I totally agree!

Maggie1920 profile image
Maggie1920 in reply to PenelopeClearwater

Hi Penelope you are 100% right to complain. It was terrible how you have been treated. Just keep going and get satisfaction for that physio using such language to you. He has probably been doing this to others i dont think its been 1st time hes done this. Good luck and big clap for being so brave.

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Maggie1920

☺️ thank you, Maggie 💙

Butterfleye profile image
Butterfleye

That's disgusting behaviour for a professional and someone who you should be able to put your trust in. Good on you though, this sort of thing shouldn't be allowed to just slide by.

Sorry you had to go through it, fingers crossed you get somewhere with your complaint.

Sending hugs 💙.

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to Butterfleye

Exactly - you put yourself in their hands and it’s such a shock when they take advantage like that.

Thank you ☺️

KimiJay profile image
KimiJay

So sorry you have had this experience especially in this supposedly enlightened era. Just want to say good for you for not putting up with that bad behaviour and fighting your corner with those who should know better and support you. To do that when you are already undermined with fibro takes much resolve and courage. Rant is good. You are awesome!

PenelopeClearwater profile image
PenelopeClearwater in reply to KimiJay

Aw, thank you - that’s really made me smile 😁

Eastermary profile image
Eastermary

There is a book called 'a complaint is a gift' and if the practice were unaware that this physio was being inappropriate and their policies were out of date your complaint gives them the opportunity to rectify his behaviour and their policies. One way forward with appointments with professionals you don't know is to ask if you can have a chaperone ( until you have the measure of how they behave) either your friend/family member or a member of staff and then if they question it tell them you had a bad experience with somebody you had to report, and see how they respond to the information.

Purplebluebell profile image
Purplebluebell

Completely unprofessional and may get struck off for this. Keep going!

You may also like...

Having a rant sorry in advance !!!

now with this horrid illness, I am on pain medication that just doesn't seem to have an affect, the...

Sorry about the rant...I've snapped.

completely impossible because your back will collapse. When you appear so rude because you have to...

Sorry to be a stranger, but I have a very good excuse :)

would remarry. We met just 3 months ago & just fell in love, he is 60yrs & I am about to turn 53...

I need a little rant!

club AGAIN! But that's not what I want to rant about. It's 'The Fog', now usually I make light of my

Having to have a moan, sorry guys

which I won't take and had have never ever given to me anything for the pain, I've had fibro for 14...