So you hurt, and want to know why, that's a big question to answer- fibro will hit anywhere anytime- so here are my thoughts-(As lived thru by me) first don't think its only you, it's not-- - Fibro gives pain where irritation was, a slight twinge is a twisted ankle- a headache turns into migraine- everything is mulitplied by x10. So next time you stand up and your ankle feels like its broken, rest for ten mins and try again. But don't stop trying- Pain is your bodies way of saying something is wrong, but the message to the brain is wrong- its telling you lies, going back to bed is the worst thing in my opinion, don't fight to be active, just sit and read, do a crossword, paint a picture, try writing a story on the computer or on paper, do something simple to keep the mind alive..keep to a set morning and bedtime clock.. I go to bed 11:30pm and try to rise at 7:30 to 8am every day, and yes even on Sunday- and being tired at 4pm in the afternoon is a pain but I resist the temptation to sleep as it would stop me sleeping at night time- if I wake early (4am) like I do sometimes, I still stay awake until bedtime comes, shattered and zombi walking to bed makes me sleep longer and better.. However; if I can't sleep properly for three days running, I will take 1 sleeping tablet. They are called 2 a night Nytol,...... I take 1 tablet at 9pm, this means going to bed at 11:30pm gives me a good nights sleep and I feel better the next day- I do this for no more than 3 days running and stop the sleepies to see if my body clock is working again.. As for house chores, do what you can when you can, don't force it, but don't make excuses to stay in bed or do nothing, this just makes it worse- feeling sorry for yourself is part of the illness, the way I see it is- Smile and the world smiles with you... Cry and your on your own-... People ask "how are you.? ", but most ask out of politeness, not because they care- don't cry on friends or family shoulders for ever, it gives them the reason not to be around.. Smile and tell them things are good.. even if they're not- convince yourself your on the mend, not getting worse- set a goal to reach and set yourself the task of doing and finishing it- no matter what, if you fall down exhausted, That's good- it will strengthen you- not kill you- be positive and you will stand tall once again- I have been ill with Crohns and Fibro since 1994 and can speak from bitter experience- to the point of not being able to walk for a year and wheelchair bound to walking small lengths- now able to do more but still struggle to keep up- its your life, its your decision, its down to you to either drown or fight to stay on top- Being kind to yourself by not doing anything helps the illness, not you live a life-
Great words of advice Karen, I believe 99% of the battle with fibromyalgia is staying positive. We have to be extremely strong and determined, and learn to live our lives in a "different" way xxx
Excellent post. It is so true that we battle on each day and something new always seems to rear its head. I can relate to your post and sincerely wish you a good day. It always seems to be an uphill struggle. Take care. xx
Be lucky in life, and lucky in love sunshine- life is full of traps, we just fall into one all the time.!
Wow. I disagree with most of what you said there, but especially this bit; "don't cry on friends or family shoulders for ever, it gives them the reason not to be around.. Smile and tell them things are good.. even if they're not".
If your friends and family don't want to be around for you when you're not well, you might need to get some new friends and family.
Mine give a damn. They want to know when I'm struggling because they want to help me when I need help.
To be honest, your post just pissed me off. Sorry to be so blunt. I'm happy for you that this attitutude helps you and works for you, but it doesn't help me and wouldn't work for me. I love hearing about how others manage their pain and cope with life in general, I love hearing what works for others. It's just when it comes out sounding like "this works for me therefore it WILL work for you too" it makes me feel like even you, who are also ill, are judging me and don't understand what's going on.
It's condescending and arrogant, even if it isn't intended to be that way.
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As I said, my thoughts are for my life- not yours, I suggested what I have lived thru and done to survive- and do you really think your friends will want to hear about your pain and horror stories for 10-20-30 years or so.? Really..??? if they do, then good luck to you and your friends for sure they really are saints..!!! But, would you want to visit your friend just to hear the same old moan and groans..for soooo looong.? I certainly don't and had a friend in that same frame of mind, I told him not complain so as to bore me to tears as I've heard it all before- BTW, your the only one to have a moan about my post...get the point.?
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Yeah, I get that I'm not afraid to disagree.
I get that some people don't like when people disagree with them, but that it's still OK to disagree.
I get that you can't please everyone and 4/5 ain't bad, so you did all right.
I get that my friends really are amazing people.
I get that if they really didn't want to hear my problems they wouldn't keep asking me about them.
I get that being told not to share with them is bad for my mental health.
I get that everyone is different, and as I said, I'm happy for you that this attitude helps you and works for you.
As I said, I get that your post wasn't intended to be condescending, but that doesn't take away my experience and feelings about your post. That is my response.
I hope you have a great day, and that you CAN share that with your friends.
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have a good and happy life hunny- life is there for living isn't it.?
I had vrry similar feelings to ukwahine on reading your post, i dont regard a difference of opinion as a good reason to insult someone or imply they are in the wrong as your last sentence clearly states. This site is for everyone who lives with fibromyalgia, and we all cope in the best way we can. I believe thinking positively is definately helpful towards any illness, in fact to life in general, but do not agree that pushing oneself to exhaustion is at all helpful, in fact i know to my own cost how detrimental that has turned out to be. I would also not advocate lying to family and friends, there are ways of saying things without boring the pants off of people, a good sense of humour goes a long way...
Who said anything about telling lies? I said nothing of the sort- please don't throw insults without foundation. And as I clearly said, its MY thinking, MY way of dealing with my life- MY way of pushing the boundaries- No where does it say I want you to do what I do.. read things more carefully and it will prevent you from throwing wrongful accusations around- regards, kazz
Smile and tell them things are good, even when they are not... i only read what you wrote. I will not be replying further i do not wish to aggravate anyone.
I do agree that a positive mental attitude is extremely helpful, and dwelling on what you can't do any more really doesn't help to lead a fulfilling life. AFter a year of being able to do virtually nothing (not due to lack of motivation but complete lack of physical strength) - I am so grateful that I can push my body a bit every now and then. HOwever, my nearest and dearest often have to pick up the pieces after I have pushed myself, as I enjoy the moment and then may not be able to do much for several days. We are all very individual, with very differing levels of physical ability and differing symptoms. I too try not to overburden my family with my long list of symptoms - for a start I bore myself, let alone them, and I don't want my children or my partner or myself to label me as unable (despite the fact I often am).
This could almost be myself speaking. I am in perfect agreement with MJD14. I am afraid when I get that extra bit of energy. I try to see how much I can do. Not so much in a sick way but just because I then know the job is done. I to, often pay for these actions later. I have a good husband who helps a lot which surprises me. He did not seem that way years ago. My biggest delight as sad as it sounds is to make his evening meal and keep his clothes washed and ironed. Yes, I do feel slightly down if I am struggling. Good luck to you all out there. You all sound to be doing the very best you can in your own different ways. I do answer as honestly as I can when asked. I always end with " it will go soon tho" so as not to worry folks. My hubby has his own plan. While i sleep he either walks or goes watching footie in the pub. As a joke he will say " there is no chance of sex then? which makes us laugh. Hope I have not offended anyone. This is just our way of dealing with it.
Thank goodness for a positive honest post, found your comments refreshing and food for thought. It gave me optimism for the future, sometimes posts can be so disheartening that I stop looking on the site. They make me dread the future with this illness. But glad I read yourS and feel that many of your comments were valid and pertinent to coping with this cursed disease.
I speak what I think, be it right or wrong.. but mainly right- most see me as too much into their faces- but I say what some won't, - or can't- for fear of being bullied or shouted down- or be embarrassed.. But glad you like- and glad you read- best of wishes, Kazz
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