please help me!

[amadahy032]

Just wondering if anyone on this forum has had to make the decision to put a loved one in a care home. And if so, at what point was it the right thing to do?

[sassy59]

Hello amadahy032 yes we did that last year for my mother-in-law. She has dementia and wasn’t doing well at home even with carers coming in. She kept falling so we took the difficult decision to place her into care.

We did lots of research and visited many homes before finding a place to meet her needs.

You will know when the time is right. Xxxx

[bantam12]

It's the right time when independent living becomes to difficult for all concerned, my Mum had dementia, we organised carers and I visited most days but she wasn't safe on her own and she would forget to eat and drink. She already attended a day centre once a week at the home she eventually went into so we made the move by her going in for a two week "holiday" then moved her in permanently, best thing we did, for her and us !

[MAS_Nurse]

Hi amadahy032 and welcome to this caring forum. Sassy59 and bantam12 have posted some helpful advice. You may find the following website helpful----

care homes/information and advice/Age uk

ageuk.uk/information-advice...

This can often feel like a difficult decision and the advice on this website covers the main things you need to know about. I hope this is helpful to you. Please stay on this caring forum where members can continue to support you. Thank you and best wishes.

[LilypOps6]

Good morning, i really feel for you & your family,i had the unfortunate task of assisting my beloved Grandma to live in a happy & safe place as she was very confused becoming a danger to herself & others. After doing so i did not feel guilty as i knew this was the best thing for her. She soon settled in the care home & lived her life safely.

You must do whats right for your loved one think happy , think safe. Your family will feel better too, not worrying about your loved one. Good luck in your decision.😘

[lKeith]

armadahy032,

Hi, there is never a right time without a lot of heart wrenching. When the loved one is unable to look after himself/herself, they leave the hotplates lit on the cooker, they can't wash themselves or dress themselves. They give up dignity and don't dress or wash just put a long dressing gown on to cover it all up. Their memory completely goes and they don't even recognize who you are. Also they may get to falling over and injuring themselves. They need care and attention almost constantly. time you cannot devote to them.

It's all very hard.

IKeith