my brother has stage 4 and my elderly dad cannot cope any more we are looking at care homes but they are all so old, he is only 61

[jennifer_eccles]

Anyone else been in this situ

[Hidden]

im sorry about your brother,is he on oxygen? as he no respitory nurses to see him,there are members at stage 4 on the forum, thay will be along to help and give you advice, also ring the blf up Monday at 10am, 03000 030 555,you will get lots of info and advice of the blf nurses,please ring them,in the meantime try to do what you can fir your brother,keep him active,light exercises,make sure hes eating no matter how small ,its hard but try,and ring the blf up Monday,the forum is open 24/7,keep lookin in fir other replys, wishing your brother well also his family,xxx

[stone-UK]

Hi

I am single 67 stage 4 22% lung function , I am on Ambulatory oxygen 2lpm recently completed pulmonary rehablitation course,

I go every day shopping do all my own cooking and cleaning although very slowly.

Personally, but not knowing and no need to know you personal situation, you brother appears to have aloud the condition to take control.

Can you not be referred to a pulmonary rehablitation course which will give your brother a more positive outlook.

[Puffthemagicdragon]

As stone says. It seems he is letting the COPD take control. I am 63 . Also Stage 4. Only on 1/2 L/min oxygen. I do most things " normal " people do. I just take longer and sometimes plan ahead. He must keep active. Get him to get his doctor to arrange PR. Best of luck. If he isn't a member here, try and get him to join.

[huggs]

You have had lots of good advice here, and you should definitely phone the BLF helpline, and, encourage your father to come on this forum and he can read for himself what people at his stage are doing. If he can realise that he can do lots to help himself and take heart from the others on this forum then I am sure that will help him a great deal. A PR course sounds just what he needs right now, and while I know this condition affects everyone in different ways sometimes, it sounds like he needs further medical help and support. Wishing you and your family all the best. hugs xx

[peege]

Hi, welcome to the site. As the others say, do ring the BLF helpline on Tuesday. They are wonderful and the experts on the medical side, have counsellors and benefits advice.

You're right, care homes do seem to be full of people older than your brother and some can be quite daunting. Again, BLF may have some advice here 03000 030 555 cost the same as a local call.

I'm sure your poor exhausted Dad is entitled to some help, support and respite. Sadly, it's unlikely it will just be offered, we have to be proactive in asking and searching for it.

I wish you all the very best and I'm sending you a private msg. Check on the envelope sign above in a few moments. Peeg

[Hidden]

Welcome to the forum,I'm sure you will find help here,or advice on where to get it.You have plenty of it already,people are so good.Good luck to you,Wendells xx

[jimmyw123]

welcome to the site jennifer, i am 68 and on stage 4 of copd,and on oxygen, i live alone in a large mobile home in a beautiful residential site,which i love very much, i have done so for the past 14 years, i have underlying illnesses, which cause extreme pain, i have council care each morning for half hour , 45 mins wed. i could have had more care if i had accepted it, this care began through the occupational therapist on coming out of one of the many hospital stays, which for the first 8 weeks was ambulatory care [hospital care] they then assessed me for a council grant care, which i got, which in turn gave me the care i get,, more importantly this occupational therapist contacted the red cross to visit me, this red cross lady opened many avenues for me, bus pass, taxi card/ benefit check, a volunteer to do shopping [for a period] a volunteer for computer lessons [help me shop online and prescriptions on line,, help in my own house etc etc, also community resp nurse who visits regular, and is there if i want to phone,, so all great help. BUT,,,,, she also got the council health housing visitor who has put me on a high priority, for this new" extra care home", , i have seen the place, all looks good , an apartment within a" home" where i would have my own independence,but ,doctors, physios, occ therapists on hand etc,, but of a lot of older senile folks there, i was told i could get word for this place, at any time, but this could be anytime up to a year for instance, in fact to put it bluntly when someone passes away, a council decide who goes in, there are a few on this high priority list,,,,, although i agreed to this, i am dreading leaving here,l love the place, i have worked on my garden for years,and still trying very hard yet, i am determined by the summer my garden will look good., but i know it is getting too much for me, so its a bit at a time when i am able,, but im stubborn enough lol,, to give it my best shot,

my advise to you jenn. is to get your brother to join this forum, ask all the questions himself, i feel for your father so much , it must be terrible to watch your own son going through this, off course i feel for you and your brother also, i would advise him to contact the red cross, its simply amazing what they can do, help in many ways, support housing etc, also would advise him to contact the b l f [on the red balloon here]. also one last thing for him.. he must have goal , an interest etc, to keep him ticking over, i know how difficult all this can be, daunting is an understatement, but theres help out there if he seeks it himself, i wish you, your father and your brother many kind wishes,, god bless jimmy

[onamission]

I'm sorry your brother has COPD does he get the right medication from his GP is he having yearly or 6 monthly breathing tests the reason why I ask is I'm 53 and I'm stage 4 COPD we are always hear to help