Comfort zones

[Laniben]

After I was ill in September my anxiety returned, I got myself into a pattern of going to bed really early, not always to sleep but to just be in what I called my comfort zone because when I’m up there I feel more at peace and yet it’s only upstairs 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’m still doing it, and I need to break the habit and get back to where I was before. If I’m in a position where I think I might not be able to go to my bedroom at the allotted time because I might be at my daughters for example, I panic, it’s like I can’t wait to get back home and upstairs and I desperately want to break this because it’s affecting me right now. Anything planned ahead of time I panic about the thought of it. Can anyone relate or offer any advice so I can break it please? Sam x

[Lovefrance]

Hi there. I fully understand your problem . I have anxiety issues and know that if I leave my house my mind will be telling me that I am not safe. Could you try going to bed a little later each night. Do you have a family member in the house that could be on hand to give you support. What about sitting downstairs and doing some mindfulness if you have a laptop. If you are not already doing mindfulness or headspace, have a look at these. They should help. Do some breathing exercises too. Have a look at The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund Bourne. This is a great book. It has helped me a lot. You can overcome this. Hope this helps.xx

[Laniben in reply to Lovefrance]

Thank you yes I do mindfulness when I can, theres no one in the house with me. I’m going to try stretching the time out. Doesn’t help that I’ve been with family during the daytime lately and gone shopping with them and it’s not too bad. Today however I’m on my own and I went to the next town on the bus, was ok to start then felt nausea and got the bus home. when I got in the nausea went, had a tight head for a short while then that went as well. Now I’m feeling annoyed with myself about it. When I go out with family in the day we’re chatting so it takes the edge of everything. Sometimes I come home with a tight chest and tense back muscles. I do need to change the routine I’ve got myself in, and if someone was here most of the time it would help but my family have their work and kids etc so can’t be here 24/7. Yesterday I had a really good day, so I feel I’ve let myself down in a way

[Lovefrance in reply to Laniben]

Hi Laniben. Please don’t think you’ve let yourself down. Just think what you achieved. You got on a bus and went into town on your own. Even if it wasn’t for too long, you achieved that. You should congratulate yourself for that. Some people cannot leave the house because of anxiety. So well done. I had a panic attack in Sainsbury’s a while ago but I managed to get through it. When you go to bed, have you tried some calming sounds like the ocean. This may help. I usually read until I start to doze off. Try and consent on your breathing too. Think about making a mantra for yourself and when you feel anxious keep repeating it.Write it down and leave it around the house so that you see it often. Carry something in your handbag that you can touch when you are anxious. Something that is dear to you. It could be a piece of jewellery, a scarf or even a photo. Above all, believe in yourself. You can manage this and when you feel the need, don’t be afraid to message me and we can talk you through the bad times. The people on this site have helped me get through times when I’ve needed it. We are all here for each other. Stay strong. Xx