I really need help

[mindovermatter03]

Hello Ive been on this forum for a long period of time and I have been feeling pretty normal the past 5 years but now I am really struggling, Im at the this point where I dont even know if its anxiety anymore or if im just depressed. i found out I was pregnant about two weeks ago and it should have been the happiest moment of my life but I was bombarded with fear. Fear that I would be a terrible mom and that with this baby I may get postpartum depression. I tried to push away the thoughts but than other thoughts started to come in and get worse and bigger. Now I fear that I will have a depressive episode and that I will go crazy or do something bad to myself to harm myself. I never would want to do any of that and that is why it scares me so much. Im scared hopeless and unmotivated all day. I feel like im in distress and dont enjoy life anymore. Im trying to make an appt to see a therapist but everyone is booked and so far out. I dont find enjoyment or peace in things like I used to before. Anxiety makes my whole body shake constantly and these negative thoughts are constant and overwhelming. Any advice is appreciated

[Agora1]

mindovermatter03, please talk with your OBG. These emotions youare feeling are not good for you or the baby.

I wish you well and to stay safe. xx

[mindovermatter03 in reply to Agora1]

Thank you Agora I have an appointment next Wednesday so I will definitely be letting her know of my concerns. Thank you!

[lawdog in reply to mindovermatter03]

I think you are a good mother already by planning to discuss your particular concerns with your physician. Wednesday is only several days away now. Together, you and your doctor can make an excellent plan for your care throughout your pregnancy ...because you are brave enough to share your emotional situation. Wishing you the best! 😍

[mindovermatter03 in reply to lawdog]

Thank you so much for your kind words I truly needed to hear that

[lawdog in reply to mindovermatter03]

You are more than welcome! Best wishes.

[OO8OO]

Our minds are flawed predictive machines.You are trying to anticipate the future, but it is impossible to plan and control all circumstances of future events. Instead, future is created at each current moment,step by step. Do what you can, and don't worry about what is not in your power. Become aware of the difference between an actual crisis, and a manufactured crisis in your thoughts.

[mindovermatter03 in reply to OO8OO]

Thank you so much for these words. I know these are my thoughts causing a catastrophe in my head and I am not and will not be any of those things. Its just trying to silence all the bad talk which causes all of my negative emotions.

[OpenWindow]

Hi. Yes, talk with docs and nurses. I would recommend a complete Thyroid checkup at some point. This won't be permanent. Pregnancy can sometimes bring about some strange things. I had carpal tunnel syndrome for my first trimester. Couldn't shake hands during "Peace be with you" at church. Try to focus and make positive notes to yourself, find a buddy and share your heart. Because you asked about and stressed taking care of your baby, I know beyond a doubt that you'll be a great mom!

[mindovermatter03 in reply to OpenWindow]

Thank you so much for these words I truly needed to hear that!!

[cbgrace1980]

You are doing the right thing by beginning work with a therapist. Good for you for reaching out for help. I promise that you will not be alone through this process. It was very brave of you to reach out here, and I'm thankful that you did. Congratulations on the little one on the way! I was very overwhelmed when I discovered that I was pregnant, and big changes like that can feel hard to process. I will pray that your baby will be healthy and that you will feel peace as you begin to move through your emotions and feelings. Share how you are feeling with someone close to you that you trust so that you can have some support. We are here for you!

[mindovermatter03 in reply to cbgrace1980]

Thank you so much cbgrace i truly appreciate your kind words. I hope that with time I can start to feel like myself again