Feeling terrible

[JDB_78]

Hi guys 1st post, will try keep it short as poss as have a tendency to ramble. Basically coming up to 4 weeks ago woke up middle of night room was spinning million miles an hour thought was having a brain seizure. Panic set in, tried to go for a walk to calm down, legs went from under me. Rang ambulance, checked vital signs all ok. They didn't want to do anything but docs wouldn't take me or local walk-in so they had no choice but to take me to hospital. They just done basic checks, ecg, blood test, blood pressure, said it was just vertigo. Luckily the major dizzyness passed within about a week but since that day I started to get chest pain, heart palpitations, chest flutters. Lightheadedness, crushing headache + nausea everyday. Pressure where your diaphragm is, pain under ribs on left hand side. Ive had days where it feels like I've been kicked kicked half way up my chest on left side. Food just seems to stick in my chest or belly + feel sick. Some pain comes and goes in seconds some stays for hours or even all day.

Called the docs, who wouldn't see me prob coz of covid rates in area. Basically said over phone that the chest pain will be acid + heart palpitations due to anxiety. Wrote me a prescription for anti acid tablets. 2 weeks later, still feel terrible, chest flutters, headaches, pain under ribs comes and goes every few days, at least not getting pain in centre of chest at the min. Im tired all the time, feeling sick constantly on edge thinking I've got something seriously wrong or even that I'm going to just drop dead. Partner thinks its all in my head or that anxiety is causing a lot of issues.

Want to ring docs back + insist on seeing someone, but just got a feeling they will either minimise the issues + send me away or not even see me at all. The only thing keeping me going is the fact this all started with a health scare and am hoping things will settle down but nearly 4 weeks later and if anything I feel worse. I've said to my partner a few times in the past couple of weeks that I think I'm not going to wake up. Have 2 kids + its absolutely killing me thinking am i seriously ill but at the same time, trying not to panic them.

Sorry for the long post, but dont have anyone who I can talk to as partner tries to play everything down + doesn't really like to talk about it as think she thinks it will make things worse. Absolutely petrified to being alone in case something happens.

[JDB_78]

Thanks mate, I only found this site yesterday and as soon as I read a few of the posts, it was quite comforting knowing lots of people feel similar to me. I know it doesn't necessarily mean there is nothing physical behind the feelings but, I know the obsessive thinking and worrying isn't helping at all.

I just feel everything is clouded at the min and can't tell what is 'real' or not. I guess the vertigo episode may be causing a residual lightheadedness and headaches. The chest pains and digestive issues are not going to be helped by the anxiety. Some days I feel like I've turned a corner, only for it to catch up with me later in the day.

Will see how things go over the weekend and then ring the docs on monday. Where I live you have to have a telephone appointment then the doc decides if you need to come in. Got a feeling however that they are trying to restrict any face to face meetings where possible. We also have a local drop in centre where you can normally just go down + wait, but even that is now telephone appointment 1st. I'm not normally good at it but guess just need to be more forcefull and insist on getting checked out properly

[JDB_78]

Knowing how I feel, I really feel for you. I'm not in any position to offer any advice as I feel lost myself.

All I can say is hang in there, keep talking to people on here and seek medical help. I've seen people say listening to music can help, maybe go for a walk- anything to take your mind off things.

I'm really struggling as my mind won't switch off from the thought that I could have something seriously wrong. People might say you'll be ok or its probably nothing, but whilst I've got physical symptoms I just can't settle. Even when I'm not in full 100% anxiety mode its still 24/7 of wondering what is wrong? why me? what am I going to do if I am seriously ill? I'm constantly thinking about the pain + how I feel, am I ok right now? 5 mins later, the same thoughts.

Like I said just hang in there hopefully people on here will offer some advice to cope with how you're feeling. It looks to me like there are a hell of a lot of people all feeling similar things.

[pmspaul]

Hi Anxious_78,

This is long too, so sorry in advance.

I understand what you're going through. I have health anxiety myself, related to my heart. I have a lot of the same pain symptoms you list, just not headaches, nausea or dizziness. I also understand how frustrating it can be when you feel like the medical professionals aren't taking you as seriously as you'd like them to. And how hard it can be to get someone to have a look at you and come away feeling like they just really cared about getting to the bottom of what you're experiencing.

Wy wife also handles this similar to your partner, playing it down for me and not sure how to talk to me so she won't make it worse. That part is frustrating, but it can also be reassuring, if she's not worried, should I be worrying so much? I don't know. Plus she's got her own stuff that I don't want to make worse either by piling on my stuff. So we talk with and support each other the best we can, but having people to talk to who are experiencing the same thing we are can be helpful.

Now, the good and bad news from my perspective. You can make changes that will make all of this less bad. Maybe even it's possible that it goes away some day. I'm not far enough along that I can say that happened for me. But over the past year, things have definitely improved for me to where I experience fewer symptoms and am more prepared to deal with the ones that pop up. But it requires effort and energy every day. It can be mentally tiring sometimes and I hate that it's different than I used to be. But at 46, I'm at the age (and probably you too if 78 is your birth year) where I begin to realize that as my body ages, nothing feels or works the same as it used to 10 or 20 years ago. The bad news at this point, it hasn't just gone away and it's taken months and months and daily effort to get to where I'm at.

Here is how I approached this issue. I attacked it from 3 directions, medically, therapeutically and spiritually. I had to be persistent with the doctors to get tests done and see specialists to make sure I could rule out everything that could be medically life critical. I don't mean everything I imagined could be wrong (and there were a lot at times), but things that logically based on my symptoms should be considered. My GP wasn't wrong about what I'm going through (he always thought anxiety), but he didn't make me feel like my concerns were legitimate or worth pursuing. I eventually got him to do the testing I wanted and give me referrals to the right specialists. Which is good, because the endocrinologist found some things going on with my thyroid that hadn't been caught since I went on Levothyroxine years ago for hypothyroidism. It also took time and research to find a cardiologist who both seemed to give a shit and spoke good English (I live in Germany). My first one didn't, but this one does. I'm also seeing a therapist to help where she can with CBT. Again, took a few tries to find one I felt comfortable with (and spoke good English). And finally, spiritually meant reconnecting and getting more serious about my faith in God. I don't know what you're faith/religion is, I'm a Christian and the faith side of this equation has been the most important component to my overall improvement.

Once I could confidently rule out life threatening medical causes, I had to try to accept and treat this for what it is, a condition caused by the mind. That doesn't mean it's in your head, it just means the solution is more complicated than a magic pill or surgery. You can do this! And if you want/need to talk, just shoot me a private message sometime.

-Paul

[JDB_78 in reply to pmspaul]

Thanks Paul, that's really helpful, just sent you a message as well. Think I've got to do what you have said and sort through things logically. Rule out one thing or another. I guess the only concern I have is being able to get the right help. My experience with docs isn't great + with covid the way it is, I'm not that confident of being able to get to see specialists any time soon. All I can do i guess is start off with my doctor + work from there. Like you, I think once I can cross a few things off my list, I'm hoping I'll feel a lot more positive about things.

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Sent an update message...hang in there...you can fix this.