Popped out

[Laniben]

I made a decision to pop out on the bus to the next town, I did it a few days ago. but today I was sort of ok to begin with then was waiting for the bus to come home and started getting very anxious, then when I got on it I felt really nauseous, got in and started gagging. So very different from yesterday. think its mainly because I didnt sleep well. I’m also meant to be going to see someone on at Mind tomorrow after they finally contacted me in the end, but now I really don’t want to go at all. I can cancel as I don’t think they’re going to help, I talk on here and now I talk to a neighbour as well. they can’t magic anything away. After I’d been in a little while I realised again how quiet and lonely it is here. No ones around and I kind of feel like I’m o a desert island in the middle of the sea. I can’t just go randomly knocking on neighbours doors, they have things to do and places to go. If I do see someone outside I open the door because I want to have a chat. Not about all this, just anything, and I’m Still feeling nauseous and a little emotional.

Hardly eaten today but have got to soon.

Sorry I’m having a rant

[JAYnLA]

Rant away! Better to get it out than to keep it in. What is 'at Mind' please? If it's counseling in person, I hope that you do choose to go. Face to face interaction is so valuable.

[Laniben in reply to JAYnLA]

Meant to say someone who’s a counsellor for Mind. They do one to ones and group therapy, not so sure I fancy the group one at the moment, so said I’d prefer a one to one for now

[Funkyfaerie]

You should try and go Sam. They might be able to put you in touch with a talk group talking to those that have been through or going through the same thing could give you comfort. And you never know you might find a friend there to do things with and be brave together.

This nausea thing is a strange on, I had it for a while and couldn't understand how being anxious could create feelings of nausea. I'm pretty much over that now, swapped it for muscle tension, unbalanced feeling and churning stomach! 😂

But I have a fear of being sick, so the slightest sign of feeling sick freaks me out. That's why I sometimes take the antisickness pill Domperidon ( sounds like a wine!) 😊

You should ask your doctor about them, you could take one before yo go out, might give you some confidence.

Talk to you soon xx

[Laniben in reply to Funkyfaerie]

Thank you Jen, yes talk to you soon xx

[Kkimm]

Hi Sam

You did really well to go on the bus. Try to not worry that it made you feel nauseous.

The important thing is that you did it and coped even though you felt nauseous

That is real progress. When you did not feel nauseous when you did it the other day, there was no real challenge so you had your real victory today.

It fits in with the principal of doing it however bad you feel and staying with it so you are not letting the anxiety get the upper hand, you are just accepting it and carrying on, which will take away the power it has over you eventually.

Like you said you probably got it because you were over tired.

Like you I got nausea quite a it at first although I stopped feeling extremely nauseous all the time early on, it would return when I was stressed. At first I kept getting upset each time I got it but eventually learnt to ignore it completely. I never really get it now.

I went to a farm open day on my own today. I was meant to have gone to an open garden because I love gardens but when I arrived it did not look a very big garden and looked a bit formal for me, so Instead I realised I had passed a sign saying farm open day so I decided to go to that. I felt a bit of a spare part being a grown up without accompanying kids but actually I really enjoyed it. I got to cuddle a beautiful kid that was only a few days old as well as stroking adult goats and photographing lots of different animals.

Have you thought if looking up where there are open gardens etc to visit? It is harder without a car but not impossible I would guess.

I really enjoy doing all this sort of thing alone and do not mind at all that I have not got a companion. If I do have a friend with me that is lovely, provided they are enjoying it too, but if they are not it becomes a drag.

My neighbour and her 10 year old are out with me tomorrow afternoon to visit an open garden and in the morning I go to a singing group. I really can't sing but I am made very welcome and really enjoy it. We do performances sometimes which is great fun. There are no auditions and anyone can join. It is a group like the one run by a chap called Gareth something who does it on television, that is what gave me the idea. It is very uplifting.If that sort of thing appeals to you you could try to look up on your phone if you have a group you could get to by bus. You seem very adventurous so I think you could do it. The other thing I do is go to museums and libraries etc alone and am thinking of joining a reading group but have not got round to it yet.

You do sound as if you have really good neighbours who are also friends, so you are lucky there.

Good luck for tomorrow whether or not you decide to do your therapy. If it is counselling you will find it will really help to talk and if it is CBT it is hard work but has proved to be really excellent in helping people learn to stop worrying. I am on a waiting list for counselling now, it will be in 5 months time!

Best wishes.

Kim

[Laniben]

Hi Kim. Yes I think the nausea was mainly because I was stressed out last nights as I havent had it for a few days. normally I’m a very adventurous person, I used to go on demos in London a while back now but don’t do that anymore. the museums are in London which I wouldn’t do on my own right now and there’s none around here unfortunately. IWas just thinking of me singing .... 🙄 I’m not very good at that unless I was miming 😊

There is a farm a little way from here but it’s not a proper one if you know what I mean. A few chickens couple of cows in a field, same with the sheep shame really,I’m surprised it’s still going really. I’m

I don’t think it’s CBT at this place, but if I do go and don’t get on with it I don’t need to go again. Will see on that one. I’m better off talking to people about other things. General chit chat etc.i know the reasons why this has happened to me that’s the silly part of it, there’s nothing they could tell me what they think it is and I’m

Not being unkind to them because I know they do help people. I guess I’ve kind of got in a rut with it because all the things I used to do we’re probably boring to many, buses to shopping centres/grandchildren etc. Sometimes I feel I could handle them sometimes not, there’s so many of them and they can be very noisy like most kids that’s the trouble lol. It does sound like I’m making excuses doesnt it? I’m not, it’s just some days when I’m feeling vulnerable, like today, I find it difficult. Yes I’m lucky with my neighbours but they’re not always here or have visitors. Think my middle name should have been worrywort xx