Feel like I'm taking steps back help

[treyjeff]

My health anxiety is not what it was half a year ago, but I still have breathing problems and get winded so easily and I'm just so frustrated and tired of this and I'm just so scared of dying. My oxygen meter will say 94 and I'll get worried. I have a girlfriend who I have a future with and life plans with and it just prevents me from fully enjoying that.

[Hidden]

Hey there,

I completely understand where you're coming from with health anxiety. I have the pulse oximeter, my Fitbit with a heart rate monitor, a blood pressure wrist cuff, and even a portable ECG (for cardiac sinus rhythm). I feel stupid carrying so much junk around, but it's what I need to do. Do you have disease or illness that causes shortness of breath (heart or lungs)? If not, and a doctor has given you a clean bill of help, you could try some CBT training by checking your oxygen less frequently or leaving the device at home while you go do a quick errand.

One of the important things here is 94% isn't terrible, it's actually normal blood oxygen saturation. Below 90% is where a doctor becomes concerned if it remains there. Consider that the room air you breath is usually only about 21% oxygen, your body apprehended 94% of it from that. I really think the CBT type thinking and mindfulness type training could help you. It's helped me slightly as I've been taking less readings from all the devices above. Your oxygen like blood pressure or pulse is going to fluctuate second by second. I saw it while I stared down my infant son's oxygen levels while he was hospitalized for RSV (a terrible virus for infants to get). It would drop in the 80's and then bounce back up to 95%. When we sleep, our oxygen levels always drop due to less breathing which is normal for everyone.

I know what you mean by feeling like you're dying, but we cannot live like that forever...or else what was the point of life? I know that's easier said than done. I'm constantly worried about having a heart attack (I'm 35) and I realize how irrational I sound, but it's hard for us with health anxiety to believe all is well. No matter how often I ask my doctor if my heart is okay, it only takes one day to return to a fear that could be decades away from happening, if at all. Try to trust your body if you don't have issues that cause low oxygen levels. It wouldn't be anxious if it didn't want to be alive...that's why we're anxious...we want to live. It's a positive sign of a body despite how terrible anxiety attacks feel. Then, of course, is the other frustrating part of anxiety in that it can exacerbate or mimic symptoms of the same things we fear. The frustration and exhaustion of the fight from this is completely understandable. Maybe seek out a therapist who specializes in phobias and CBT. As you begin to trust yourself, your body, and that all is well, you can live a more carefree life. Best wishes and I hope you overcome this. I would also toss the tool you use for your oxygen levels away more often...it's like the Google of "doctoring"....the really good instruments are in hospitals and would cost us hundreds or thousands. Many of the cheaper options are for ballpark figures.

Take it easy for now and hope things get a bit better as quickly as possible

[treyjeff in reply to Hidden]

I do have asthma but it's considered mild

[Hidden in reply to treyjeff]

Same here and I swear that can make the health anxiety all the worse. It's like a vicious combo we have to deal with...am I just anxious about my breathing or am I having an asthma related issue that's causing me to be anxious? Then the fact that most of medications can cause "jitters" doesn't help either. I understand where you're coming from. If it helps, you might find investing in a portable nebulizer (available on Amazon and various places) to be a lot of help if the asthma is part of the health anxiety problem. Truly hope you're able to feel more calm with all that you're going through.