chronic nail biting (new here, warning graphic descriptions)

i've been biting my nails since i was 4/5... i want to get answers quickly so i'll keep this short.

it's like whenever i see or feel any growth or length or white edge on my nails my mind is screaming at me to bite, bite bite. i can't stop. the bad-tasting polish does not work as i can ignore the taste and i will continue to bite subconsciously, or somethings consciously, out of compulsion. i CAN'T feel any uneven ridges in my nail ends. i bite the skin around it, strip pieces of my nail off, i have to bite bite bite until it feels like they're not there. even just tapping my hands on the desk can signal me to bite because i feel them there. whenever i think about them, i have to bite or i am overwhelmed with uncomfortable feelings and i try lightly scraping the nails with my teeth them without breaking them off, but that just weakens my nails and prevents the beds from growing, and eventually i give in and just chew them off.

nail polish has not done much at all. i don't like drawing attention to them anyways- and when i feel the urge to bite, i HAVE to, and i end up ignoring the nail polish.

before i have put tape over the ends of my fingernails, but they fall off very easily. acrylics too, i'm a very hands-on person and they end up coming off very easily. to the point of putting bandaids on all my fingers (they just get nasty after i wash my hands) or marking my fingers with sharpie or just sitting on my hands. it doesnt work. i have to bite.

and while they're growing out the nail beds don't follow until they've been growing out for a while, so there's an excessive amount of white parts and i feel the urge to bite it. they're down to about

i can't bring myself to stop. after i do it i feel terrible and unclean and disgusting, because my nails are all cracked and broken and the skin is damaged and it HURTS.

my nails are too sensitive. sometimes they've been growing and i feel the need to press them down into my skin because they feel like they're growing away from the nail beds (they aren't)

i've grown them out once before. but there was so much white parts showing that i ended up biting off one or two... i designated these as my chewable nails and whenever they'd grow out i'd bite them. but it got too much. i had to destroy them.

please help me, they're in terrible quality and if some of you could suggest some nail care products or ways that have helped you... i can do any kind of embarrassing stuff, like probably paint them since i have a break during summer where i will not have to see anyone. please help me find a way to ignore them. furthermore when you first start growing them out the nail is terrible weak so if i could get some suggestions on oils that could strengthen them that would be nice.

surgically removing my nails will be terrible for me and is NOT an option.

this is killing my mood and confidence.

anything is well appreciated.

[Hidden]

Hi, I’m sorry to hear of your struggles with this.

You seem to have tried the products I am aware of to try to help.

Maybe a trip to your dr would bea good idea to see what he or she would suggest for this. It maybe that getting to the reason why you feel the need to do this is what is required, which may require some therapy, with some self help suggestions. Or maybe other options are available your dr could suggest to help you. Certainly in my opinion some professional help may be a good idea as it seems you have tried the other options available.

I wish you all the best.

X

[DeeM3]

Do you have any other obsessive type thoughts?

[Hidden in reply to DeeM3]

yeah im sorry its been so long