Was doing better, even laughed at myself a... - Anxiety Support

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Was doing better, even laughed at myself a bit. But, now I'm thinking I have something seriously wrong with my health again. ALS scares now.

Mrworrymaster profile image
7 Replies

Hello,

I was told I have serious anxiety issues. So, I went to therapy and was prescribed 10mg of Lexapro. Took it for a bit, and I did feel better. I was led to this point because I was afraid I had COPD, then Heart Issues, Then Parkinsons, Then Lung Issues, then MS...and now....i'm onto thinking I have ALS.

Looking over all my previous health scares, it's just silly and ludicrous; I know that. But, with each of these scares I actually had the symptoms. I was short of breath, I was shaking, I was puking, I was off-balance. Basically, whatever fell in line with the disease I had the symptoms.

Now, after an MRI, a CT Scan, a Stress Test, an Echo of my heart, blood work, and numerous other tests.. I accepted it was anxiety and it was time to take medication to fight it. Worked for a bit, but the doctor bumped me from 10mg to 15mg and here I am.

My hand has a twitch on top-between the muscles. It maybe twitches for no more than 1-4 seconds, about 1-3 times a day. My arms feel a bit fatigued, and my coordination is off sometimes. To be perfectly honest-it was more off when I was worried about MS instead of ALS. My legs feel a bit tired to, but I'm always bouncing my legs nervously so maybe that's it.

So I did the worst thing possible. I ran to my old friend: MR. Google. I'm obsessing with research again. Each post convinces me more and more that I have a problem and should be worried about ALS or Motor Neuron Disease.

Do I have clinical Weakness? Not really...but I feel a bit clumsy. Is my hand twitching all the time, or anything else twitching? No..not really, just that one spot. I don't really know what I'm looking for here, besides support and some kind words. As most of you probably know, this feels very real to me because my anxiety is an issue.

Thank you,

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7 Replies
Agora1 profile image
Agora1

Hi Mrworrymaster, please stay on the Lexapro and continue therapy. Work with the therapist on your health issues. Mr Google is not your friend in this case. You seem to be rationalizing what is real and what isn't. You have come a long way since we first heard from you. As for Lexapro, I have been on 15mg a day for several years. Take care.

Mrworrymaster profile image
Mrworrymaster in reply to Agora1

Thanks Agora,

It feels like I haven't made any progress at all. Peaks and valleys I suppose. I think the root of my issue is my two little girls. In terrirfied something I can't control is going to take me away from them.

I try to tell myself that a normal person with pain in there wrist and hand, and an intermittent muscle twitch, would conllclude that they work on a computer all day and need to give themselves some rest. But my anxiety keeps having me ask the dreaded question....but what if????

Agora1 profile image
Agora1 in reply to Mrworrymaster

I know what you are saying Mrworrymaster. What we worry about isn't written in stone unless a doctor diagnoses a problem. We can only do so much, we can't control what may happen from day to day. The "what if" use to keep me from going forward until one day those two words turned into "why not". It starts to open up a lot more positive thoughts in our life. And oh yes, pain and intermittent muscle twitch in your wrist and hand can very well come from the computer. Carpal Tunnel produces a nerve like pain and some muscle twitching due to the position of our hand while on the computer. I've had that for a long time. Give your 2 little girls a big hug, it's the best medicine :)

elatan profile image
elatan

Google is not our friend! Stay with the Lexapro and it will help. I suffer from similar issues, researching non-stop, totally convinced I have something seriously wrong with me, and then realize it is my anxiety. Honestly, staying busy helps me so much, but sometimes I really don't feel well from my anxiety and I completely get that. It's the worst feeling, but sometimes you need to take a step back and stop yourself from researching. Best of luck, and feel free to PM me if you need someone to chat with ever. I completely understand.

Mrworrymaster profile image
Mrworrymaster in reply to elatan

Thanks elatan,

The researching makes me feel better temporarily. But then my mind mullsnover the hours and hours of research I've done and before you known it I'm a nervous wreck.

salsagirl20 profile image
salsagirl20

If you had a serious condition your doctor would have found it on all the tests you received. Its your anxiety doing all those symptoms. Anxiety plays tricks with our heads it can make you believe anything, and it looks like anxiety is making you believe you ALS or MND. I feel you though when I hear a story about someone getting a heard attack or stroke and dying I start to get all the syptoms possible then it makes me actually believe this is happening to me. It's so frustrating. If it makes you feel better go back to your doctor and ask with all the tests that I have done would the tests have shown if I have ALS or MND. It will really make you feel better. Don't be ashamed about going back to see the doctor if it makes you feel better then I say go for it. Don't go on Google instead come straight here for support. I hope this helps.

Mrworrymaster profile image
Mrworrymaster in reply to salsagirl20

Thanks for that. Of course, I've never been to a neurologist so my anxious brain makes me think..."oh wait..that's what I've missed!" But over the past 7 months I didn't think I had any nuero problems. Just problems with lungs, heart, and brain. Now that all those have checked out it's almost like i'm looking for other things it could be.

The crazy part is that when I have these thoughts I fully believe that them. I'm a logical person in all other areas of life, except for this!

I have the same odds of having ALS or MND as a 32 year old male, as I would have as going outside and being struck by lightning. But, if it's raining and I'm taking the trash out I'm not huddled in a corner, researching frantically about lighting attacks, symptoms of attacks, or what people being hit by lighting first felt before being hit.

With these health scares I just hone in and get overly focused. I read somewhere that a stressed system basically begins to shutdown after prolonged periods of anxiety and stress because the nervous system can't operate at heightened levels all the time. It's far more probable that's whats happening.

Again, thank you for taking the time to respond. This website does wonders.

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