I've got time on my hands! Hope you like this one.
The Gadget.
I saw one of those and it was rather good,
Though I couldn't believe it was all made from wood.
I'd never considered one for my own use,
I thought it too large and the fixings seemed loose.
The controls seemed so fiddly, you'd need a degree!
It was far too complicated, I thought, for me,
Yet the chap in the shop seemed to handle with ease
All the buttons and knobs and the black and white keys.
It did all kinds of stuff, all by itself,
But before I could blink, it was back on the shelf
With its legs tucked beneath it. It's bright coloured lights
Would brighten up even the darkest of nights!
It could simplify even the hardest of tasks,
Or put out the garbage in black refuse sacks.
It could cater for dinner, do laundry for four,
Then wash all the dishes and vacuum the floor!
So I asked the nice salesman to give me a quote,
I watched him consider and read what he wrote.
I signed the agreement, arranged for despatch
And on my way home, wondered what was the catch
That a gadget that did all the work of a maid
Should be sold for the measly price I had paid!
I counted the days 'til it finally came,
Then I tore off the carton and clear cellophane.
I plugged the thing in and pressed the right knobs
And sat down to watch as it did all my jobs!
Ironing, dusting, feeding the cat
And plumping up cushions where I had once sat.
Then I pushed some more buttons and pressed a black key
And waited, expecting a nice cup of tea -
But instead, it just spluttered and coughed and then rocked.
So I pressed some more buttons, but they had all locked
And smoke gushed out from it and then a bell rang,
Then finally came an almighty loud bang!
There were springs on the table and cogs on the floor
And a low sort of whirring, then it was no more!
I realised then, it was not any good,
But what did I expect from a thing made of wood?