Finding Freedom, keeping Free, and seeking help as and when necessary, Being here for others and understanding their pain.

[Babe1213]

HI I am from the UK, born in west London almost 75 years ago. Now living in the Home Counties As a young child I suffered much abuse, sexual (brother), physical (from dad) mental (from mum) neglect (parents) loneliness and isolation at school - totally friendless for entire 11 years from age 4 - 15. As a young bride at 20 I was offered (outside the church door - £200 to leave my husband to be at the altar) by his parents - then on birth of first child offered £250, to leave my child, husband and his family - with the in-laws. This did nothing for my self esteem. For the next 5 years I took the knock backs. Depression began at age 25. By then I had 3 children. Following trauma in my family - my dad died, mum became more dependant, brother a bastard in every way but the true way, that is he was born in wedlock. At 31 I suffered stroke like symptoms - called Cerebella Ataxia- loads of tests to discover what had happened. Rare tumour, followed by breast cancer (twice) mastectomy. I then spent 35 years hooked on prescription anti- depressants, anti- anxiety tablets, lost all those years living in a bubble. There came a point when I was visited by my then parish priest who recognised my need and understood my situation and suffering. He offered to counsel me, and I got on well, but he then left the parish. I was almost back to square one until another priest stepped in and led me to a place of total healing. I became a Lay Minister, which am still involve in. Today I have 3 children, 15 grandchildren and 4 great grandchildren (2 more due early next year) My husband has been disabled for a lot of the 55 years we have been married, our daughter and 3 of her children have the same condition as him. I was diagnosed with angina and have 2 stents, in my heart. Diagnosed with Atrial Fibrillation in 2016. Nowadays I cope fairly well, but have the occasional set back, which I will not allow to thwart me. My immediate help comes from my faith. I pray. God answers. I joined this forum earlier this year, and try to reply honestly to the comments of others. In most cases I have been there done that, worn the T shirt. If a condition comes up here that I know nothing about, I will investigate and comment, hopefully in a positive way. I firmly believe for every negative there is a positive, and not always through medication but the willingness of other to help themselves. I have many stories to share that may be helpfulI will do this as time goes by

[Roxylox]

Welcome to the site Babe1213. You have been through a lot.

[Babe1213 in reply to Roxylox]

Thank you for taking time to read, and your positive comment. It sometimes seems like a lot, but in fact it has been a privilege to go through some things. As a Lay Minister I counsel many people who have been through similar situations and this enables me to say with conviction to some people, 'I really do understand how you may feel, I don't KNOW how you feel as we are all unique human beings.' But the main thing for me is that I have come through to a point of acceptance and forgiving, thanks to my faith in God. A lot of people won't understand this, but this is who I am. If He GOD can bring me through - He can bring others through, and He wants to bring others through their hurts.

[Roxylox in reply to Babe1213]

I like to go to a church at quiet times. I get peace and comfort there

[Babe1213]

It pleases me to know you find peace and comfort in church. I also like the times when I can meet with the main congregation and sing, preach, teach and enjoy my Christian family. xx

[designguy]

Hello and welcome to the group, you are an amazing survivor and glad you found the help you needed and what worked for you. I hope you find it helpful and rewarding here.