Can't see any way out.

[formidible]

Can't see any way out. Today has been one of my worst days so far. I'm supposed to be on 45mg Mirtazapine and 10mg Diazepam daily. But the increase from 30mg to 45mg Mirtazapine has not been helpful so I have been chipping bits off and only took 8mg Diazepam yesterday. I've just taken another 6mg today as feeling so terrible. I have no real support here and often feel so lonely. I have developed irrational phobias over past year. I'm not in a good place and am reaching out to anyone who can understand. I don't want to start getting suicidal because that's just not me.

[FriendlyDude]

You could probably try talking to your doctor about the dosage. I’ve heard people say on here that an increase in prescribed dosage has had side effects, and that it’s because the body is adjusting to it, so it might just be a transition period. Don’t take that as fact, I’m definitely not a doctor 😂 I’d just recommend talking to your doctor if it continues to be a problem. I hope it gets better, I believe in you, I’m sorry you don’t feel you’ve gotten support here, I hope I helped somehow

I wish you the best!

[formidible in reply to FriendlyDude]

Hi. Thanks for replying Friendly. I wasn't saying I'm not getting support here. I feel I am and its a lifeline. I don't feel I'm getting more support locally. My doctor is calling me next week so I can talk to him then about the new dose. I'm just worried also about my anxiety. Just doesn't seem to be getting any easier no matter what I do.

[FriendlyDude in reply to formidible]

Oh, okay. Sorry for the misunderstanding 😅 glad you feel you’re getting support here I hope you can have some more local support too!

Many things take time to produce a result. Seeds don’t become trees overnight. Also, you can’t really tell if a tree got taller over 2 days, but with proper watering and nourishment, it will grow. Someday you’ll look at that tree and realize it grew tremendously! The important thing is that you keep trying. Believe in yourself and believe that it’s possible to get better. Do your best, no one can ask more of you.

Good luck with the doc next week!

I wish you the best

[FearIsALiar in reply to FriendlyDude]

Love that “seeds don’t become trees overnight”

[detour13]

Ya I have days like that,, its reallly hard . Not much you can do. You need to fight the beast and hope tomorrow will be a better day, it really sucks we are forever reaching down deep to pull out the strength to deal with it.. I personally don't know how much inner strength I have left, I may have used it all up over the years ..

[FearIsALiar]

Hi! I’m sorry you’re having a rough day. Just know tomorrow is a new day and you can make it a good day 😊

Do you go to therapy at all? It is pretty helpful but if you cannot afford it I recommend looking into some self help book on Amazon. Read the reviews first before buying!

I feel lonely as well sometimes. It seems like a lonely time for everyone since covid.. but that’s amazing you reached out! That’s progress !!!

If you do get suicidal please let those thoughts PASS. Do not act on them or pay any attention to them just know they WILL PASS.

[FearIsALiar in reply to FearIsALiar]

Hope you feel better soon. Let us know how you are!

[FearIsALiar]

Thought I’d mention a book to you. Look into hope and help for your nerves by Claire weekes..Lots of people recommended it to me on here! Great book for anxiefy

[Pat9]

Hi being someone who many years ago used to be dependent on Diazepam and now taking none I know how your mind can make you feel and think only meds will sort out how you feel, they are not the key however I have found to understand the mind and work on mindfulness which is the greatest thing I have ever done helps way more than any tablet does.. there is an app called Headspace it is extremely good and of course Dr Claire Weekes and her books from many years ago are excellent reads.. also now you you tube many good videos on training the mind.. as when you realise that just how you breath can alter what emotions you feel it helps to work on the mind instead of waiting for medication to do it.. for instance just breathing in deeply then a long breath out fools the body into believing everything is well and so anxiety will plummet as chemicals in the brain react to the deep breathing as when we are in fight or flight we breath short breaths.. it is amazing to realise just how much power we have to help us control these horrible emotional feelings.. anyway good luck with this I know how low it can make you feel so keep up the fight and stay strong as you can xx

[formidible]

Thanks Pat. Yes I do try mindfulness and meditation sometimes. Maybe I need to do it more often. I will look up Dr Claire Weeks. Thanks.

[FearIsALiar in reply to formidible]

Please update us! We care about you

[formidible in reply to FearIsALiar]

Thanks so much Fear. I have started reading "Hope and help for your nerves" by Clare Weekes, which is helping so far. I'm still having low mornings. Yesterday was a better day overall though and I was able to concentrate on the TV programs I like to watch. I have a friend with whom I have phone conversations with on some evenings. He has his own issues, but on the whole it helps as it reduces my sense of social isolation. I also go on some regular zoom group meetings. I know mindfulness can help and I'm trying to do more of that. I have gone back to my therapist and next session is next Thursday. I still am worried about how I feel sometimes, still with low self esteem and not enjoying things like I used to. Sometimes I feel I hate myself but never entirely sure why. I suppose healing takes time. Thanks for saying you care about me. I really appreciate that. I'm happy to keep in touch with everyone here, or even to chat on one of the phone apps or the phone. Thanks again.

[Bluemarie]

Dear Sir, you are not alone. Try sitting outside. I am in your shoes each day. This is real. I have found just changing the venue helps. If you can, look at a colorful magazine. Research another country online. Big hug for you from Texas. Hang in there.