I thought it would be fun if some members wrote a funny poem about afib using ChatGPT. It's easy to do. Just sign up and ask it to write a funny poem about afib (or a serious one) and put a few keywords you want it to mention. You'll have a tailor-made poem in seconds. Here's one I put on Mark's thread.
Great Jean. Your poems knocks ChatGPT out of the water - I think you missed your vocation in life! You should have been a programmer for ChatGPT to write the poem algorithm heheh.
Love this Jeanjeannie, must have missed it first time round. This is me too. I have drawers on castors under the bed but they don't come out very often. The last time I found 7 pills - and lots of fluff!
My neighbour started banging on my wall at 3:20am this morning, can you believe it? Fortunately, I was still up, listening to music on my new speakers.
I turned it up louder to drown him out but he kept banging and shouted “can we have a little respect please?”
I shouted back “I’m not a big Aretha Franklin fan but I'll put on Lulu's Bang a Bang Boom instead”.
I've never thought of taking the drawers out of the bed to look for pills dropped. Knowing my luck they wouldn't go back and spiders would set up home there!
Here's the silly story I put on here a few years ago:
A fantasy story for those with AF and living in isolation
Written by JeanJeannie 25/3/2020
Escape to the Planet Ayef
The world was in turmoil, it had been several months since the virus outbreak had started and caused worldwide panic. More and more people were suffering each day.
Then early one sunny morning, quite unexpectedly, people awoke to the sight of something more than strange, if not a little sinister, large domed and circular space crafts were dotted around the world. Absolutely no one had witnessed, or even heard their coming. They sat quietly and by mid morning, on the day of their appearance, armed soldiers were guarding their perimeters.
It must have been 2pm before the first contact was made. People watching their tv's suddenly saw their screens change, colours became more vivid and then suddenly a man appeared. He looked about 40, was slim and had a calm, peaceful vibrancy about his person that no one quite understood. His hair was long and tied back and he wore a simple kaftan.
“Earth friends, we come in peace and aim to help you recover from the predicament you find yourselves in. Unfortunately, you have lost your way on this earth and veered greatly from the basic rules of caring for your beautiful planet. I am sorry to say that your greed and uncaring nature has brought this about. While half of the richest people in your world struggled not to eat too much and grow fat, the other half starved and lived in extreme poverty and you gave little thought to them – if any thought at all. You continued to destroy large areas of wild forests and the beautiful rolling countryside, with no thought but for your own profit. Plastic and other waste now litters and pollutes your seas and land. I have to tell you that nature intends to take drastic action and eliminate every one of you from this world before you destroy it completely.
There is no need to fear us, we come only to help and if you will listen we can save your planet and everyone that lives here. The cure is simple, you must begin caring about other people, more than you do about yourselves and gathering possessions. You must discard all electrical gadgets that work through airwaves and start communicating, with people face to face in a loving and kind way. You must adopt a simpler style of living and please, please remember that all that is needed in life is healthy food, pure clean water and air, shelter, warmth and the love and caring of all the worlds people. Remember too that you are one race – the human race! You have it in your power to stop this virus, but unless you adapt to simpler living you will not survive.
We are here to help those on this planet that are of our descent, we placed you here two centuries ago to try to show these people the right way of living. You have tried your best and failed, now we need to take you home.
All those who have a heart that beats at what earthlings call an abnormal rate are our people, though of course they have never known this. They are the only ones who can live on our planet as our atmosphere is very different to yours. I ask all you people with this condition to report to your nearest spacecraft, you need bring no possessions, they are not valued in our world and you will be provided with a simple kaftan on entry to the craft. Do not bring any medication as you will not need it with us, the air on our planet is pure. You are going home friends, home to our beautiful planet Ayef”.
Maybe when you wus a child. Spaceship lands in Central park NY and huge robot(Tron) gets out and stands silently. Michael Rennie is a handsome alien and has come to destroy humanity for bu**ering up Earth.He falls in love with a resident and changes his mind until the army start trying to destroy Tron and his spaceship. Can't remmeber how it ended.
I think we first had a t.v. in 1955 or 56. I don't remember that film, but do remember the actor Michael Rennie, there have been lots with spaceships landing. We had to go to bed before 8pm and were only allowed to watch the children's programmes.
No you don't need to take anything. You wont need pills in Ayef because our hearts beat the way they do and that's what's required to live in their atmosphere and there it's called normal rhythm.
Poet laureate I am not, so I’ve cheated by adding a slightly different version of a well known ditty which I hope will bring a smile……great post and even better replies!
Thanks Paul for setting up a great thread! I'm doing a short online poetry course so it's been great fun reading everyone's rhymes - digital or otherwise. Clever stuff! Last week I wrote a poem about my childhood heart murmur (hole in heart) and a second about getting mended, age 15 and feeling "normal" whatever that means! Still waiting for inspiration on 3rd verse - the wonderful Afibs. Will post when I've found it!
When all of a sudden for no reason at all it goes completely berserk leaving you breathless and dizzy and totally unable to function or concentrate on anything not even knitting or television and there’s no time to even remember punctuation
Hi Jenny yes it is hard to add punction when you are in afib the knitting is not a problem as I don't knit but people have said I'm a big knit have a lovely day and I enjoyed your poem
Didn't have the time/ For a very good rhyme/ But did my morning read/ With this morning's New York Times news feed/ And while I thought I knew AI/ It was just slice of the Pie/ Article by Kevin Roose/ Which unfortunately only rhymes with "Moose"/ Something everyone should read/ Something everyone should heed/ Just don't read before going to bed/ Hard to get out of your head/ AI is a very hot topic/ But don't get too myopic/ Remember Hal in 2001/ He was not a lot of fun.
Clever poem James. Hal was short for Heuristically programmed ALgorithmic computer. Trying saying that 10 times very quickly. Shall we start a tongue twister thread heheheh.
I’d love to have a Mini-Maze Cos Afib puts me in a daze. I can’t do nowt when it’s about, Can only shout and shout and shout. “Oh not again” I do despair, I clench my teeth and pull my hair. And then I take my Flecainide And creep into my bed and hide Until it goes away and then I’m back in sinus once again. I worry too I’m old and grey And this darn thing won’t go away. It comes and goes relentlessly With never a warning I can see.
My EP is a lovely chap He sees what I am getting at. Life quality is all my choice And oh he has a lovely voice When pointing out the risk of stroke. He really is a super bloke. I understand we can’t agree. And am grateful he indulges me. I showed him pictures of my clots So he could see that I bleed lots. He understands I bleed so much That I can’t take such awful stuff With dripping blood from mouth and teeth That makes me shudder as I speak. I tried so hard but all in vain, It really is an awful pain. And I admit to all of you that anticoags are taboo For me.
I’m planning to book privately. To get advice so I can see If I’m a suitable candidate. And then I know I’ll have to wait Because I can’t afford to pay. But maybe there will come a day For NHS to come up trumps And help me get out of the dumps. So even though I’m past my prime I hope that there may still be time. So fingers crossed, the dye is cast A Mini-Maze might come at last,
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