Seeking inspiration: Hi everyone, I'm a... - Weight Loss Support

Weight Loss Support

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Seeking inspiration

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April

Hi everyone,

I'm a night owl I'm afraid! So here I am lying awake as usual worrying about my weight. Is there anyone out there doing the same? I'm thinking of starting a BIG diet next Monday. That is - a very low calorie diet - 800 cals per day. I did do this before and managed to stick to it. I lost 3 stone, but over the years some of it has crept back on . The thing is, can I really stick to it a secon time around?

It's also different now as I work from home, meaning I am dangerously near the kitchen all day, whereas I used to be out at work. I also have to cook for my husband who is poorly at the moment, having chemotherapy. So I need to keep producing interesting healthy meals - which is hard to do when you can't eat them!

But, I want to do this for lots of reasons. I've just has spinal surgery for spinal stenosis, and I need to keep my weight under control to help my back. Both my parents died of cancer, and I know obesity is a risk factor for many cancers. My daughter has a learning disability and I need to be a good role model for her and help her manage her weight. Plus, I'm 58 and on HRT. I want to keep my weight down to stay healthy now I'm through the menopause but taking hormones.

I'm not very keen on exercise but I am active. I walk a lot and use a static exercise bike. But I need to ramp this up. I'm thinking of trying some pilates.

Anyhow, if anyone wants to join in the conversation and tell me about your weight loss plans and worries, please feel free. Its very important to keep focused and motivated. I'll sign back in in a day or two and see if anyone has replied! I hope so!

Looking forward to hearing from you!

Bye for now!

28 Replies
Tall1732 profile image

Hi I was 118 kg when I started my weight lose plan. I loved my food and drink and even though my wife and kids would say I’m fat I just carried on.

This was until December 2017 when after Christmas binge I weighed myself and bmi came up obese !!

This made me decide I needed to act. I had been off work since October after ankle surgery for ligaments and tendon damage the extra weight probably didn’t help. I started using a app called lose it did calorie counting and the weight came off. I hit 82 kg by the summer which was probably a bit low.

My weight stayed stable over the years until I went skiing and damaged my knees causing me to leave my active job and have surgery and take 9 months to recover.

I now walk daily play tennis and will be using the gym again to keep knee strong and hopefully gain muscle mass. I’m 6ft 5 tall and 84.6 kg when I look at my old pics of 118 kg i look pregnant!! My wife says I need to put weight on and should be around 90 kg but I currently eat around 2900/3000 calories a day with a lot of fruit and love 0% fat Greek yogurt.

I find it’s all or nothing with me,if my mood slips I binge eat or get over tired Any want any advice message me

TheTabbyCat profile image

Hello SmileyPerson and welcome to the weight loss forum.I'm sorry to hear that your husband is poorly but this is all the more reason that you need to look after yourself,too. I doubt that eating 800 calories a day will give you the strength that you need. Losing weight isn't all about very low calories, it's also about what you eat. Here are some links which I hope you find interesting.

Please also have a good read of the Pinned Post “Welcome Newbies”.

This is a very large community with lots going on. May I suggest you use the webpage as opposed to the app at least until you know your way around. Take your time and follow every thread so that you know exactly what’s going on.

Here’s the link for a “Tour” of the forum ,if you haven’t already taken it.

If you do decide to count calories please check your BMI on the NHS site and obtain the correct amount of calories for you.

The Daily Diary and the Weekly Weigh ins are very good places to begin. You will find the DD and WI in the Pinned Posts

I find the Daily Diary a very good place to share my plans and get inspiration from other members, too. Once the day’s food is written down I’m far more likely to stay on track.

The key to success is participation, we are all on the same journey.

If you can’t find something just shout, there’s usually someone around.

I hope to “see” you around, Good Luck.🍀😉

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April in reply to TheTabbyCat

That's so kind of you to be caring about me. Thank you. The problem is its easy to 'be kind' to yourself and eat too much. I understand what you are saying. However, that's why I've put on weight. I have done Lighetr Life before and was very good at it. It worked, I lost the weight and felt fantastic so I would like to see if I can mimic that myself with Exante. I haven't got that much weight to lose - only 1 stone - so I can possibly do it in 4 weeks.

I do cook lovely nutritious meals for my husband and will continue of course. I just need to wait a few weeks before I can join in eating them. I may not be able to do it - I dont know - but I am going to try. Thank you for being so supportive. I'll let you know how I get on!

N-o-r-d-i profile image
N-o-r-d-iMaintainer in reply to SmileyPerson

Hi, I had lost loads of weight on Lighter Life about ten years ago. I think I was 122kg when I started and 6 months later I was about 63 kg or so. I was very happy not to think about food and thought I found my way of dealing with my weight problems. I think I would happily stayed on meal replacement for life, only you have to start eating food eventually 😊 then the weight started creeping back up, and I would turn to Exante to try and somehow manage it, but didn’t really work for me anymore. I still think it can be a good way to lose weight when it’s required for medical reasons or so, but for me personally it didn’t solve the actual problem. I kept gaining weight and then I was diagnosed with endometriosis and given hormonal treatment, which didn’t help at all. In July 2019 I found myself weighing 135.4 kg. And then I decided to address my food and my habits rather then weight. I started looking for a way how I can stop gaining, rather than desperately trying to lose like before. I was looking what I can change daily and incorporate long term as habits and generally - how I can help myself to deal with the problem that I had. The weight loss came almost like a by-product. All those months later i am now at a healthy weight. I’m nowhere near finished, because I need to figure out how to maintain. This is a life long project for me now. You have a lot of challenges as it is, and I wish from my heart that your journey to a healthier you will be filled with self-compassion. And you will always get the support from us here. All the very best!

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April in reply to N-o-r-d-i

Hi, Thanks for telling me about your weight loss journey. It's interesting to find someone else who has done Lighter Life and knows the reasons why these very low calorie meal replacement diets work. You lost a hell of lot of weight on Lighter Life - totally amazing! But I also understand how it slowly went back on again. We all have to live on real food and learn to deal with it. I know LL is not the whole answer. But I figure the first step is to lose the weight, the next step is to keep it off. I have got incredible will power when I want to have it - ( my father was in the Army and you must never let your commanding officer down! )I will say, seeing as we are talking about ways to lose weight, I also lost loads of weight with slimming tablets - diethylpropion. They block your appetite and stop you thinking about food. I thought they were really fantastic. However I am not allowed to have these right now as I am taking mirtazepine - an antidepressant - not because I'm depressed because I'm not, but to help me sleep.

I'm so glad you have found a way to deal with your diet and are a normal weight again. Many congratulations. That's so good to hear. It's very difficult to develop a healthy realtionship with food ! Thank you again for messaging me. Much appreciated.

N-o-r-d-i profile image
N-o-r-d-iMaintainer in reply to SmileyPerson

I did lose a lot of weight on LL, but this time round I lost even more (I went from 135.4 kg to 66.5 kg) and it didn’t even cost me anything 😊 The idea of losing weight first and then learning to keep it off is very familiar to me and LL seemed like a perfect way to achieve that. But as I said, sadly, the second part didn’t happen to me. So I tried from another direction - learning to deal with food here and now so that it gets me to a healthier version of me at some point in the future. I can’t yet be sure this is the right way. If ten years from now I find myself at 150 kg, I’ll know that this current way was not a long term solution either 😁 however, I’m hopeful, as this time I was eating regular food throughout, so I believe there’s a chance that I formed at least semi-permanent habits by now 😊

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April in reply to N-o-r-d-i

Sounds like you've cracked it! When I've lost the weight I'll quiz you further on how I can keep it off! I remember seeing this guy on TV who had lost loads of weight with great difficulty. What he was doing to maintain his weight was shop every day for food for 24 hours at a time, so he never had more than 24 hours worth of food in the house! He was so worried about losing control. I was amazed - but I can undertsand why he did that. It's a shame food becomes the enemy. Anyhow, guess we all need to find whatever works for us! Let's stay in touch!

N-o-r-d-i profile image
N-o-r-d-iMaintainer in reply to SmileyPerson

Indeed, I actually went through that stage myself, when I bought food everyday for that one evening only and had nothing else in the house 😊 now I can shop for weeks and it doesn’t bother me anymore 😊

N-o-r-d-i profile image
N-o-r-d-iMaintainer in reply to SmileyPerson

Don’t get me wrong - I’m not trying to discourage you or anything, I fully appreciate how restful it can be to take a break from the decisions you have to make about food all the time. I’ve experienced that myself and it was such a huge relief for me. I simply shared my story and my experience. The meal replacements do include required daily nutrients and vitamins, so in my opinion they are better options than to drastically reduce the amount of calories you get from food. I wish you all the best achieving your goals!

Tgostswimmer profile image
Tgostswimmer2020 August

Hello! When I read your post I hear a person who is providing a lot of care for other people, someone who is shouldering a lot of responsibility and worry. I wonder if you need to reward yourself with food... I don't mean having a "good" day so you can eat a mini Mars bar in the evening... more trying to look at food as nourishment for lifes challenges.

Those healthy meals you are lovingly preparing for your husband as he recovers - you need that care too. Maybe in an appropriately sized portion. Think about the minerals and vitamins you would wish him to eat, and give yourself the same advantages to keep your mind alert and your spirit strong.

I think pilates would be a fabulous addition to your activity. It will strengthen your core & improve your posture. Would it be worth checking out with someone how to do it safely so that you are not putting pressure on your spinal issues. I'm not a medic! But there are experts out there who can reassure you and provide motivation.

Taking some action, small steps and focusing on that while you are night-owling will help to remove the worry. Keep positive! And check in with us - there is a lot of support for you here on your journey x x

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April in reply to Tgostswimmer

Thanks so much for being so kind. You are right about needing to look after myself, but I feel I've given in for too long and had too many treats - I need to find ways other than food to reward myself. I think you are right and I am looking into pilates! You must have read my mind! I'm getting organised, watch this space ... Thank you for your lovely message!

BridgeGirl profile image

Good morning, SmileyPerson :)

I agree with Tgostswimmer : you could be eating "interesting, healthy meals" with your husband, rather than depriving yourself when you have so much care and responsibility on your shoulders: preparing separate meals is just one more job you're giving yourself. Some people find the 800 cals gives them a quick start which they find encouraging but you need to be thinking now about where you go from there so you don't have the same result as before. It's "interesting, healthy meals" that will keep you going.

You've been given several links to follow up and they're all useful: I can see you catching up with them in the early hours, tomorrow. I'll give you one more: a simple, straightforward plan built around real food that I'm thinking could work for you and your husband

The Daily Diary and weigh ins all run for 24 hours so you're welcome to drop at any time of day and night. Take a few minutes to chat to others and you'll soon feel a part of the community :)

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April in reply to BridgeGirl

Thank you for taking the trouble to message me. It's so kind of you. Yes I agree real food is the best option - but - I know from my previous efforts at losing weight, what I liked about Lighter Life was that it took choice out of the equation. I didn't have to decide what to eat or just have a bit of this or a bit of that ... I only had my milkshake or bar - and it worked - and I lost 3 stone. I felt good - and I really want to have that feeling again.I only have a stone or so to lose so if I blast this I can possibly do it in 4 weeks. I dont' know if I can - but unless I get out of this mindset, nothing will change, and in a month I'll be a stone heavier.

I'm planning to get organised this weekend, and start on Monday. So Ill keep you all posted. I am very grateful for all your concern and suggestions of course. I know it won't be easy and I might fail, so we will have to see. ! I'll look at the Daily Diary -- Thank you!

BridgeGirl profile image
BridgeGirlAdministrator in reply to SmileyPerson

When you said an 800 calorie plan, I didn't realise you meant meal replacements. I was thinking you meant 800 cals of food. I hope all goes well for you with the losing phase and the maintaining phase/returning to eating your Mediterranean meals :)

It sounds like you have a huge amount going on at the moment. Ultimately, your weight loss strategy is down to you. Such a restrictive diet may work for some but it could add unnecessary pressure at an already stressful time and I'd suggest a longer term healthy eating plan which you could perhaps adapt so that you're not having to cook completely different food for everyone. Personally, I just cut out/down on the unhealthy/ processed/ refined foods without counting anything, whereas a lot of people here lose weight by counting calories and/or carbs.

Good luck, I'd suggest using the different threads on here such as the daily diary and weekly weigh-in as they offer a lot of support. They also show how many people balance healthy meals with cooking for the family.

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April in reply to Greendream123

Thank you for taking the time and trouble to reply to me. I really appreciate your comments. The thing is we never eat processed foods - I cook everything from scratch. We eat very healthily - its pretty much a Mediterranean Diet. I don't drink any alcohol. We don't eat red meat, just chicken, and fish. It's just probably portion size, eating puddings, and treats that are the problem. Anyhow, I would like to try the Exante 800 and see how it goes. I only have a stone or so to lose and might be able to do that in a month if I can stick to it. It will be very hard I know, and the transition to normal food is hard too, but I'll keep you all posted. Thank you again.

Jinny1234 profile image
Jinny12342021 April

I think your Wonder Woman with all you have going on.. I find we can expect too much of ourselves too soon, especially after surgeries- I recently had surgery & although the need for weigh loss wasn’t too far from my mind, I have only started again on Monday (12weeks after surgery)

Without expecting too much - I started with the plan to be better than I was eating wise, rather than the perfect plan and guilt ridden Myself if I slipped up.

Currently getting on so well - I have cooked a few pinch of nom recipes & went for the handier choices on busy days, like pork chop, beans & pots.

Had extra time spare on Monday for batch cooking - it was brilliant having Tuesday evening off cooking, made a soup for go to lunch & chicken fajita that was tasty lunch.

On Monday I did plan roughly what I was eating a few days ahead & got the groceries in to suit.

Have quite a bit going on health wise but it can only help my arthritis being healthier😊

A friend recently lost 2st over a 3mnth period, approx 2 lb a week, so that inspired me & it visualized what can be done in that time...

That’s my aim - 2stone by the end of June.🤞

Good luck on your journeys

BridgeGirl profile image
BridgeGirlAdministrator in reply to Jinny1234

Welcome to the forum, Jinny1234 :)

Planning is definitely way to go. Have a look at the Daily Diary where members share their meal and exercise plans: it's a great place for chatting about food choices and pinching ideas and recipes. I'd also recommend joining a weekly weigh in: the team support is great.

You'll find them both, and all our other activities, in Pinned Posts Have a good look through them all so you know what's on offer.

Active participation is the key to success around here so I hope we'll see you joining in and making the most of it :)

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April in reply to Jinny1234

Your cooking some really interesting dishes. Sounds great. I just want to blast off a stone, then transition to healthy recipes. I know the Pinch of Nom recipes are really good. Slow gradual weight loss is best I know, but I've trying that forever and just putting on weight, not taking it off. If I do the Exante 800 for a few weeks I can set off my weight loss as I mean to go on. But I know its only a short term solution. In the long term healthy eating is the solution for life. Thank you so much for messaging me. Thank you!


Hi Smiley Person,

I think you are amazing.

You are so inspiring and reading that has helped me to keep going.

I am not a healthcare professional so I won't even try to give advice.

But would it be worth discussing your plans with the medical people who can?

I think they will be really supportive and they may be able to help you.

I wish you and your loved ones every success.

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April in reply to Jared71

Thank you for messaging me. I'm really not amazing - though it's very kind of you to say that - anyone would do what I'm doing in the same situation. It will be good when my husnband's chemo is over - he is having a stem cell transplant - and he feels well again and our lives can resume some sort of normaility - Covid permitting etc ... We love ballroom dancing and I can't wait to go dancing again! And I want to fit into my dress and sparkly shoes!Thanks for the suggestion. I'll let you know how I get on.


1vern0n profile image
1vern0n2020 August

Hello SmileyPerson, Like you I have spinal stenosis and joined this forum for ideas and support. I started doing the Mosley 800 diet this time last year for three weeks and lost 9lbs and then calorie counted 1000-1200 calories a day from then onwards. I have found that due to my limited activity I do not need many calories but have found intermittent fasting helpful, so I do not eat until lunch-time and usually have homemade soup and then eat "normally", albeit it smaller portions of whatever my family are having. When you have dependants it is exhausting meeting different dietary requirements so try to simplify meals. I have cut down alcohol and do not eat again until the next day. I'm not perfect and slip up at times especially with birthdays and other celebrations which is fine as long as you are aware of that. Fortunately, I have never liked ready made meals and always cook from scratch. Tabbycat has pointed you in the right direction and I hope you find something which you will be able to sustain. Good luck.

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April in reply to 1vern0n

Hi, I've met someone esle with spinal stenois! - How are you? How does it affect you? I know what you mean about not needing many calories etc... I just had to have spinal cord decompression in January and it has helped me enormously.I agree that intermittnent fasting is a great option. I've been trying to do this too. I don't eat until about 2pm when I have a homemade smoothie. Then we eat dinner about 7pm and I always cook froms scratch and we eat very healtily. Your home made soup sounds a great option. But despite doing all this I'm still gaining weight. I don't drink alcohol either. We do have a pudding- as my husbnad loves puddings - although it's usually fruit and yoghurt for me - and we do have chocolate in front of the TV most nights and I find I can't say No!

So all this has to change somehow.

As you know with spinal stenosis its crucial to control your weight. So this is a major incentive. I'll let you know how I get on. Thank you for taking the trouble to send me a message. Much appreciated.


san_ray70 profile image

I joined S.W. two years ago, I would recommend it, they give you an idea of what is good for you. It is harder to maintain as I have found out. I am still trying and when we can go back to sport i.e. table tennis, short mat bowls, dog walks in a park not full of people. I hope to continue to lose weight. Good luck to you, I used to have trouble sleeping, but lately since the clocks went forward, I am getting 6/8 hours. I do not go to bed until almost midnight.

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April

SW do you mean slimming world? Yes, I'm all in favour as its a great diet and super ecipes but I can't lose weight on it. I agree being active is vital. I hope you can get back to all your activities soon as lockdown eases. Glad you are still losing weight. Thanks for your message!

Mildred1 profile image
Mildred12021 January

Hi, 800 cals would be way too low and not sustainable . A very low calorie diet like this would slow your metabolism right down and signal your body to store fat and burn muscle for energy. You need around 1200 to 1600 for healthy and sustainable weight loss. I'm using nutracheck for calorie counting and lost 9 lbs in a month. There's also my fitness pal and other free apps. The app gives you your daily calories and mine are just over 1500 per day. I would starve and be malnourished if I only ate 800 and no way could do that long term.

Dianenonebutme profile image
Dianenonebutme2021 March

Hi SmileyPerson

It’s frustrating, when you know what to do, but for reason unknown you just can’t. Be kind to yourself. The simplest root, don’t count calories. Eat heathy tasty food and try intermittent fasting.

You are on the right track reaching out to your community. Don’t stress!

I used to weigh 90KG I am now 64KG

I will be 45KG by the end of the year, with tweaks to my eating.

Don’t think about the weight, think about small changes!

SmileyPerson profile image
SmileyPerson2021 April

Wow -you have done so well I'm really pleased for you! I'm sure that's very good advice.The thing is - I feel I want to shift some weight first, then keep it off - so in the future I will do exactly as you suggest. But right now, I've paid for it and I'm trying to do Exante 800. I started today ... so it's very early days ... but I'm determined to try for a month and see what happens. I have done a similar diet - Ligher Life -before and it suited me really well. So I decided to give this a go. But I only have a stone or so to lose and when I've lost it, I will be on the healthy real food diet for sure. Thank you for taking the time and trouble to message me! And many congratulations to you again!

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