Ask the Wellness Expert

Fed up and always feeling unwell!

Hi guys I'm new here. I dont normally whinge on about being fed up and in pain. Then I came across this site and thought these are going to be like minded people with possibly the same issues I have and may be able to help me and I them if I can.

Well I'll start that I've been a carer for both my parents since 2005. That was the year that my parents split up, my brother died aged 40. Just went to work one day and 5 mind after arriving dropped dead on the floor and ended with a giant bolt going through the back of his head where he fell onto it. Doctors said that he wouldn't of felt it because he was dead before he hit the floor. He was my dads son, so my half brother. And my dad moved out and I went with him. They say that the 3 hardest things for people to deal with is divorce, moving house and bereavement. My dad had all that within weeks of each other. I decided his need was greater than my mums at that time so I moved out with him. We still came back to my mums everyday (because they stayed good friends after they split up.) Also I was a bit angry at my mum how she treat my dad towards the end of thier relationship. Around this time I started suffering depression, anxiety, panic attacks. A couple of months after my mum had a mini stroke or t. I. A. Her personality changed quite a lot. She also struggled with her left side of her body afterwards. She became incontinent and never really recovered. She became a loner. Never went out. Was always in some sort of illness and disease and suffering. She had a hard life but was the best mum. I went to see her every day to do what she needed which was always alot. Last year she fell 35 times and couldn't get up. She was a large lady. She spent hours on the floor waiting for an ambulance to come I'd be there with her. Sometimes I managed to help her up when I wasn't suffering with my back. I have just been diagnosed with spinal stenosis and damage to multiple discs. The doctors dont want to give you pain relief. My mum died in January of myopic cardiomyopothy. My brothers and sisters havnt really bothered with us so its all been on my shoulders for a very long time. Last November my dad was diagnosed with dementia. He's not too bad at the moment but I know its going to get worse. I have a small son he's 5 now so my times been divided between 3 people. When I first quit smoking I went from 14 stone to 28 stone within a short space of time. So you can imagine how tired I was. Ive lost 6 stone in just over a year but I'm hardly eating. I'm proper depressed and fed up and tired and also in pain with my back. Lost my continence through the spinal stenosis. I suffer with high blood pressure. Low vitamin d. The list can go on but I think that's enough for the fist one. Sorry if it seems rambly. Thanks for reading. Xx

4 Replies
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I see this was written some time ago but just wanted to say it's understandable why you are unwell and fed up you have more than your fair share of hard times, I really hope things get better for you and you can get some help for yourself too

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Thankyou caz046. I'mtrying to get the help I need but as with everybody else I struggle to get appointments and am waiting months to see doctors etc. I hope things start looking up soon.x

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I know it all takes ages and can be frustrating waiting but I hope you get the help you need and can hang in there meantime

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No instant ansqer but a history like that with a series of bad events and consequences - try to keep aroutine for health

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