It doesn't rain it pours?

Last week was basically a right-off. I did not manage to go to the gym once and my diet and mood were terrible also. Something that I have not really mentioned before is that I have been dealing with a lot of pressure from management in my hospital who are being overly harsh on me since I have had my shoulder problems. I have been subjected to an audit of my work and things like bleep tests to ensure I am answering my bleep within a certain time. This is the sort of treatment that doctors are getting across the NHS and we work in quite a horrific environment these days with extra managers being put in place to audit us all instead on focusing on the quality of patient care. its so sad that instead of providing me extra support to help me do my job properly, the hospital are constantly grilling me to see if my diagnosis and problem are leaving any cracks. By the time it came to Friday, I was really down mentally and all weekend I have felt so terrible about it all.

My consultants and people within my department have been so fantastic and supportive. I am thankful for this but if this sort of treatment continues I may look for another department to work in. There are a lot of political issues going on in the NHS and I don't really want to get into it but the mood/energy has been so so negative for sometime and it is getting worse by the day.

So this week I will need to try and resolve a lot of these problems as its an extra layer of stress that is really affecting me right now. Outrageously, they have also moved me so that I am oncall over Xmas weekend despite OH and my GP recommending that I should not do any oncalls for 3 months. Fan-dabby-dossie!

It doesn't rain, it pours right?

Hope you all had a better week than I did!

Surely next week will be better! It has to be!


6 Replies

  • Wow, Adam. I've read through your posts, and you are really going through the mill. aren't you? As if working in the NHS these days wasn't so horribly stressful enough... I've no words of wisdom to offer (especially not to doctor!) but I can offer my support. I would say don't be too hard on yourself as regards the diet etc - you're in enough pain and stress already without you adding to it by beating yourself up over a burger and a well-earned GnT or two. It's hard to summon up the will to do anything when you're in serious pain, so I applaud you for trying as hard as you are.

    Be kind to yourself!

    PS Some people swear by turmeric/curcumin for inflammation. Believe me, I'm as sceptical as the next person, and it did s*d all for my husband's arthritis, but I know some folk for whom it's worked wonders. Just a thought.

    All the best.

  • Hi there!

    Thank you so much for your kind words of support. It really does mean a lot to me. Its in my nature to be hard on myself as I hate being unproductive or being unable to be the person I want to be and know I can be. I wish I wasn't like this but it does push me to constantly better myself I guess.

    Will definitely check out the turmeric/cumin idea - you are not the first to mention that! It just slipped my mind. I wonder cooking it reducing its anti-inflamm. properties?

    Please do keep giving me gentle nudges along the way - I really do need it!

    CUDOS to you,


  • Hi Adam

    Just a thought have your employer's ie OH Department completed a risk assessment whilst you have this injury. Employer's no matter where you work have a duty of care to protect you and them.

    The risk assessment will identify the risk/s associated with your job and your ability to fully complete your job and it is a record of any agreed temporary measures that need to put in place to support you during this time - much like a maternity risk assessment during pregnancy. It affords clarity.

    As your condition progresses then the RA can be updated as required.

    Just a thought 😀

  • Very good idea, I will speak to my OH co-ordinator now about it. I just would not feel comfortable leading a crash call and doing cpr when my shoulder at rest is so painful. I have a duty of care and it totally shocked me that they would want to put me in the kind of position. Classic NHS, I tell you! The workforce are bled dry and then thrown away when we can no longer perform.

    To give you another story: My father (a total sweetheart who would die for his patients) is a single-handed GP in Scotland and the abuse he got from the health service and council during/after he got infective endocarditis and was in CCU for a month was an absolute disgrace. He still has bouts of fast AF and since it happened over a year ago, he was offered no help or support but rather they have been trying to force him to resign early and move all his patients to another practice. He works in an extremely deprived area in Glasgow and there was no consideration whatsoever to the impact that would have on his patients' lives who would have to travel a long way to see their GP. This is one of the main reasons I actually pursued Wecudos - without the public knowing, it is being totally destroyed and regardless of what they say, patient care is NOT the top of their agenda and the doctors, nurses and all allied health professionals are working in a culture of negativity and fear. The foundations are however ethically glorious but its just being managed by the wrong people unfortunately.

    My story is just one of thousands I am sure that are happening everyday. So sad. Anyway, Rant Over!

    Hope you are well and thanks again for your genuine offers of support. I will not forget this and my journey through this all will be dedicated to you and everyone else who needs a source of inspiration.

    Best wishes,


  • Hi

    It is terrible how doctors and nurses are treated now, i really do sympathise, and there are alot of people on your side. I could start ranting about the current government...grarg!

    Try not to beat yourself up, you really are doing very well. If i was dealing with as much pressure and stress as you I would probably be eating chocolate mousse for every meal, with tiramisu for pudding.

    Somethings got to give, and sounds like changing jobs might be a good idea, if possible.

    Wishing you all the best

    Hedgehog x

  • Hi Hedgehog,

    Thank you for your kind words. I will certainly look into changing hospitals if the harassment continues. It has been a ridiculously challenging past few weeks but I am still standing and fighting towards reaching my goals. You are right though, sometimes you need to let go and not be so hard on yourself when it comes to your diet.

    Keep in touch!