Circle of Pain and Weight Gain: Hi, I joined... - Stand Up 2 OA

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Circle of Pain and Weight Gain

shazzyp62 profile image

Hi, I joined HealthUnlocked 3 years ago and up until now I haven't written a thing,what a waste of a great resource!

Having read some of the wonderful,kind words of support people post,I thought it's time to say hello.

I'm a 58 year old Grandmother of one,Mum to two and a wife to my wonderful 3rd husband.

I never realised,in my youth, how much my weight would affect my life in later life. I used to tell the world I was happy being fat - I felt fairly healthy and right up to my early 30's I continued to expand,at my heaviest I was 26 stone. Then I lost my Dad in an accident and it made me re-examine my life.

I lost 8 stone and I felt great. I'm an emotional eater and life became difficult so I'm ashamed to say I went back up to 22 stone.

By the time I got to my late 40's I must have tried many diets and I stayed around 19 stone for years. Then came the Menopause,4 years ago and my life began falling apart.

Gradually, my mobility has declined because of terrible pain in both knees. Osteoarthritis in both,also in my neck and lower back. Fatty Liver Disease,Gall Stones, and a history of DVT in both legs.

The combination of ailments means I take medication,this means I cannot take anti inflammatory meds. GP's won't let me take anything stronger than Zapain,which doesn't seem to do anything. I take Amitriptyline to help me at night, but I am now suffering from Anxiety and Depression as well.

My family are great and try to help but I'm so angry with myself because I didn't keep up with physio exercises once I was discharged and now the pain is excruciating,so I comfort eat and I'm gaining weight so the pain gets worse. I'm now just under 22 stone.

I feel wretched and I just don't know how to break the cycle.

Sorry to go on and on x

13 Replies

Hi Shazzyp62, you `are not alone. I too have struggled with my weight in a very similar way. It really is very difficult, but the worst thing we can do is criticise ourselves- we are our own worst critics!

I have PMR which means taking steroids and Amitriptyline, neither of which help at all!

5years ago I began to have OA pain in both knees and eventually about 3 years ago, in my hip too. Like you, I couldn't take anti-inflammatories and couldn't find anything to help the pain, not even morphine!

All the consultants I saw.said I had to lose a lot of weight before they would operate. Eventually, following their advice I saw a bariatric surgeon as I couldn't lose any more weight ( Ihad lost 4 stone) due to pain and immobility.He wouldn't operate on me because of the steroids- dead end!

Eventually, I was in so much pain that I couldn't stand it any longer. We decided it was worth using our savings to pay any surgeon who would operate. None of my local surgeons would, so I looked online and contacted a few. I found a surgeon in London and he has now replaced both knees and both hips!!Despite being told so many times how risky it was to operate, I have not had any complications from all 4 ops.

I am now 5 weeks post my last knee replacement and I am so glad I persevered. I can now see a life of so much less pain and immobility ahead of me.

My motto is : never give up!

shazzyp62 profile image
shazzyp62 in reply to suzy1959

Thank you suzy1959.

I've had that conversation with a surgeon,and was told I'm too young and too heavy.

If I could unlock the secret to stopping the need to comfort eat,I could lose weight and keep it off.

I'm pleased for you that you've taken the I initiative to get your ops done privately. I hope you continue to heal well and have a long,healthy,pain free future

Shaz xx

suzy1959 profile image
suzy1959 in reply to shazzyp62

Everyone is likely to comfort eat at times, but not everybody is obese, so there's nothing wrong in comfort eating per se.

Losing weight is quite easy in the short term but we have all discovered that diets don't work long term, so why do we keep doing it?. I have been looking at the Obesity Uk website and they would like us to recognise that obesity is a long term chronic disease with frequent relapses. I now believe that this is accurate and it has taken the self-blame away to some extent. The problem is that there is so much weight stigma around, especially among doctors.

We are not greedy, we are not stupid and we don't want to be fat- so why are we? I have done loads of psychological work on myself and have sorted that but I still eat too much, too often. Did you know that obesity is 40-70% genetic?Your body is more in control of it than we realise, often programmed to make us put on weight after we have lost it as a survival mechanism. Scientists recognise that it is extra hard for us to override that. Don't let people fat-shame you because its so" bad for your health"- they think this entitles them to be judgemental- it doesn't. If you're not obese you have no idea what it's like!

We fat people have to stick together and care about each other!!!


A number of us seem to be in the club, so welcome! I am 69, mother of 2 girls (now young women) and a lovely 8-year old grandson who is chafing being stuck at home in this time of the Coronavirus! I suffer from arthritis in the knees which started post and injury 15 years ago.

I too have struggled with my weight from the time I had my babies by Caesarean section, and could not exercise. In those days, the 70s, it was crudely done in India, a cut across the stomach muscles which reduces muscle strength hugely.

Well, I tried many things and none worked. In 2019 January, my son-in-law Lamech told me about the LCHF diet, which he’s read about. Both of us started it together, but he stopped after 2 days while I persisted. This is my modified form of the diet: I eat a meal after 12 noon (anything I want incl butter, nuts, peanut brittle which I love), Then again the next meal at 8 pm.

In between, I have 2 small cups of milk tea with a tap of jaggery in the mornings and 1-2 cups evenings. The first 2 weeks of diet were terrible for me- I kept thinking about food. But I amused myself watching movies on Netflix or doing internet search on interesting topics. I stopped thinking about my weight after a few months.

My weight over the past 1 year has come down from 110 kgs to 96 kgs. I feel energetic. I do take afternoon naps, keep moderately active in the home, and read. I dont walk long stretches because that aggravates my knee pain. I would urge you to try this diet, it has worked so well for me, not being as strict as the books say, but evolving my own type of the LCHF. Take care

Hello suryakaizen ,

Thank you for replying to my post.

I am currently struggling with Depression so I'm not able to start a new eating regime - it's kind of you to suggest it though.

I am at home, like many others so I will look at the LCHF plan - who knows, when I can see some light at the end of the tunnel, it maybe exactly what I need

Shaz x

May I suggest you google Bright Line Eating? Susan Pierce Thompson is wonderful and has helped and inspired many of us who are food-addicted. Honestly, this is worth exploring since you feel so defeated by your weight problems.

Thank you for your reply cambridgeborn .I am open to anything,after all life changes all the time,so new thinking and ideas are always worth a look and I certainly will be.

Shaz x

Hi Shazzyp62, I truly hope today is going well for you. I understand what you're going through. I'm facing a lot of the same things and it's certainly a challenge everyday. I've decided that maybe it's time to talk to a therapist for the depression and anxiety. I'm also an emotional eater and night time is the worst time. I started snacking on fruit or nuts when I get hungry in between meals or when i'm stressed and want to eat eat eat. So far it's helping! The challenge is that, during this difficult time we're facing, we tend to eat more. I've been trying to walk a little more so that i'm not sitting all day. I certainly hope things get better for you. I will say a prayer for you. Stay encouraged and take it one day at a time. God is our strength!

Thank you for your kind words clothedinstrength7 , this virus is not just hurting people directly is it? It's hurting people in all kinds of ways.

I am pleased for you that you've made the decision to talk to someone - I truly hope it helps you. Thank you for your prayers, although not a believer myself, I am open to any help and would certainly never refuse it.

May your faith keep you safe x

Thank you for sharing, you have helped me, just by reading your posts and knowing I’m not the only one. My knees seem worse when I am in bed. I don’t know what’s wrong with them as when I went to the doctors I just had a big lecture about weight! It is a viscous circle, I am walking less now as it’s so bad 😬

Anyway thank you again, wishing you well .

shazzyp62 profile image
shazzyp62 in reply to

Hi, I can understand you not moving around as much. My pain level dictates how much I can do and because I move less, I get very stiff which affects mobility even more 😞 I can't seem to get the motivation to get the weight off.

The truth is I am stuck in that circle.

I wish doctors could see that we don't want to be the way we are,it just feels like such a huge challenge, I can't find the path to the Mountain,let alone climb up it 😳

I hope you find some joy in your life,thank you for taking time to talk to me ♥️

I was recently diagnosed with Osteo. I toonhave struggled with weight gain during lockdown. The combination of boredom, pain, stiffness and not being able to go out so often is a recipe for disaster.

shazzyp62 profile image
shazzyp62 in reply to

Thank you ,thekobokid. It's reassuring to know that I am not alone in my struggle.

It seems crazy that, during this time,we have more opportunities than ever to get into an exercise routine, but still not able to maintain it. 🙄I hope you're keeping well otherwise 🙂

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