I am not normally lost for words, but I have had two situations recently that have tested my ability to bite my tongue and make sure I say the right thing that won't cause offence.
The first incident happened recently when I was waiting for my back exercise class at one of my local hospitals. A friend called me up and was scared that her daughter has breast cancer (she had skin cancer and beat that some years ago). She has been very kind and supportive of me, which I really appreciate. But then she started quizzing me about what the doctors said to her daughter and did they say the same to me? What does a 3-D mammogram involve? What does it mean to have dense breasts? I started getting flashbacks to what I went through earlier this year when this whole nightmare began. She then asked if it was OK to talk about my experience and I told her it wasn't. She was apologetic and felt awful, but so did I.
The second incident happened today. A different friend (who lives in America; it's been years since I last saw her) emailed to say her mammogram was all clear. She knows about my diagnosis. I haven't responded to her yet. It just feels like I have been kicked in the teeth. It's not that I am not happy to support friends or wish them well, but it just reminds me of my situation. Does anyone else feel this way? I feel so selfish right now.
Thanks for listening,