Please HELP: My boyfriend just came in to visit... - Quit Support

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Please HELP

ickytoots profile image
ickytoots10 MONTH WINNER
20 Replies

My boyfriend just came in to visit iv been totally fine not much craving. Don't want to smoke again. My bf has stated he will not be giving up smoking EVER fair play to him I love him. But he kissed me good bye I had to lie about why I pulled a funny face he stank of smoke. I've turned into a hypocrite what can I do help!!!!

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ickytoots profile image
ickytoots
10 MONTH WINNER
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20 Replies
Briarwood profile image
BriarwoodAdministratorLONG TERM WINNER

Hi icky toots, errrrr maybe get a new boyfriend😂😂😂😂😂

No I'm only joking but unfortunately us non smokers really have an acute sense of smell when we quit😷 even more so I think than people who have never smoked. As smokers don't know how bad they smell, it's pretty hard to convince them. Get the mints ready for the next kiss😏 and a large bottle of mouthwash👍 you're not a hypocrite but things are different for you now and you can't help that. Talk to him about it and I'm sure he loves you too and will be understanding and make every effort to support you💕😃x

ickytoots profile image
ickytoots10 MONTH WINNER in reply to Briarwood

Jeezo I could never ditch him he put up with me doing it even if he can't smell it. I was honestly ok with him smoking in front of me but kissin was BIT STRONG I'll need to brooch the subject xx thank was just a big shock to turn into a hater so quick!!!!

Briarwood profile image
BriarwoodAdministratorLONG TERM WINNER in reply to ickytoots

There are quite a few of us on here who quit but our hubby/partner/ or whatever ya call them still smoke👎 of course I'd prefer it if mine didn't, but he does and that's not going to change any time soon😱

You just got a shock but it will all be fine, so don't worry and remind yourself how well you're doing😃x

ickytoots profile image
ickytoots10 MONTH WINNER in reply to Briarwood

I did I got a big shock.. I don't like the smell of smoke. How good am I gettin SMOKE FREE FOREVER...

monky profile image
monkyAdministrator34 Months Winner in reply to ickytoots

Aup Icky :) defo a hard one this gal :o

I'm with Briarwood and Glolin on this :) just let Jeezo know how much you love him, but also let him know that he stinks of fags too :o and try to work something out between the two of you eh, maybe you give '' HIM'' a couple of mints or the mouthwash before he kisses you goodnight :D :D

Icky, I ask you please not to get onto him toooo much, cos he will just smoke even more if you do eh :o just let him know how you feel and how well your doing :) :)

Good luck :)

glolin profile image
glolinLONG TERM WINNER

Hi icky toots,

It is a hard one, but you don't want to offend your boyfriend either. Like briar said, have a talk to him, and explain how your feeling as he wouldn't realise how much he stinks 😫😫 it's not till you quit that you really smell it.

Hopefully he will support you through your quit journey💟

ickytoots profile image
ickytoots10 MONTH WINNER

Bad thing is I know he supports me I'm just going to have to grin and bear it ain't I xxx

monky profile image
monkyAdministrator34 Months Winner in reply to ickytoots

Icky, this is your incentive to quit and quit for good :) :)

Your job now is to do a good job at quitting, if you see what I mean :o You show Jeezo that you CAN quit and although its hard, it can be done :) even by a mere Woman :D :D I know its early days for you yet, but let him know how better you feel, how better you smell, etc :) but dont moan :o just sort of little digs here and there eh :|

Please just give it a bit of time and you never know, he just might decide to quit himself :) :)

ickytoots profile image
ickytoots10 MONTH WINNER in reply to monky

A mere woman lol ;-) your funny he might quit I can always hope

monky profile image
monkyAdministrator34 Months Winner in reply to ickytoots

Hay Icky, one never knows gal, one never knows :) :)

You take care now and try to keep focused and positive on your quit and keep reminding yourself WHY you want to quit and become FREE again :) :)

shantimar profile image
shantimar

Hi there icky toots 😄

My hubby still smokes but I don't care that I offend he knows his place and that's it 😜😜😜

Seriously it is difficult I've said before I even smell smoke on him even after a shower 😕

Like the other two lovely ladies have suggested have a heart to heart with him and explain things. I'm sure he'll understand and carry mints 😃😃

Good luck to you with your boyfriend and your quit

Keep in touch

Xx

ickytoots profile image
ickytoots10 MONTH WINNER in reply to shantimar

Thanks it's so help ful I think it was the initial shock of the smell god I spent most of my adult life smelling like this Ew xx

roneo profile image
roneo

There's an old "churchy" saying...."hate the sin, love the sinner". He's still the same bloke as he was before you quit. If you value your relationship, whatever you do, don't put pressure on him to quit because you have. By all means ask him to respect your decision to quit & not to impose his smoking on you. The was a pastor in Argentina who challenged new converts NOT to tell anyone.......unless they asked. If you can demonstrate the benefits from quitting & how much happier you are, believe 90% of smokers will want to know how you did it. If you're grumpy, miserable & critical of smokers you sending a message that smokers have more going for them than non smokers. If his smoking is a deal breaker, that's OK, but if you love him, love him unconditionally, stinky breath & all. He may never change, but if he quits because you pressured him, he will harbour some resentment which will ultimately destroy the relationship anyway.

ickytoots profile image
ickytoots10 MONTH WINNER in reply to roneo

You make so much sense I DO LOVE HIM SMOKE AND ALL I don't want to get the bad name of the nippy non smoker. With all derogatory comments so hear is to day 4 for me NOPE XXXXX

roneo profile image
roneo in reply to ickytoots

For what it's worth, there's an ole bloke down in Aussie who is very proud of you & your progress.

Briarwood profile image
BriarwoodAdministratorLONG TERM WINNER in reply to roneo

Hey Ron, I'm proud of you too 😘😘x

roneo profile image
roneo in reply to Briarwood

Thanks Briarwood. You just gave me a surge of oxytocin. Hugs to you too!

ickytoots profile image
ickytoots10 MONTH WINNER in reply to roneo

Oh my your so sweet ... Can I ask you one more question is it normal to go off your food at the start of quitting?? I can't stomach much at all just now?? That's been for 3out of the 4days iv quit? Xx

roneo profile image
roneo in reply to ickytoots

You're blessed! It's not uncommon to mistake nicotine withdrawal for hunger. It can be very easy to substitute cigarettes for food. If you are abstaining from cigarettes without increasing food intake, that's great! As long as you're meeting your minimum nutritional needs, you'll be fine.

ickytoots profile image
ickytoots10 MONTH WINNER in reply to roneo

I'm meetin the needs of my body but just when iv been having snacks iv felt sick!!!

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