How to work alongside smokers?

[Salamah]

Hi guys, im new to the site after deciding to quit 3 weeks ago. Im struggling this week because I have someone working with me who smokes and due to my job we can smoke whenever we want and its difficult to get away when someone else is smoking. Anyway I ended up asking the person for some and bought a 10 pack today as I felt guilty taking his fags! Feeling quite down about it now because I have to start from day 1 again

Has anyone else had this issue and how did you cope?

Forgot to mention today is the last day im working with him so hoping to quit again tomorrow but im worried this situation could come up again

Thanks

[monky Administrator 35 Months Winner]

Aup Salamah

Firstly I would like to welcome you to this lovely quit smoking site, we are all in the same boat as you, as they say

Emjay is our lovely quith smoking adviser and am sure she will be in touch with you shortly and theres loads of help and advice, you just ask

As for working with a smoker, I live with 2, which dosnt help me at all but am now 9 weeks quit with the help of this lovely site and the people on it Erm you have to be truly focused on your quit, be positive that you want to do it

I've found over these months, that you have to plan your quit, be prepared for any erm, mishaps that might arise

You do sound positive about quitting, cos your not leaving it long before you quit again My advice to you is, feel sorry for them, tell them that you have quit and ask them not to smoke in front of you. But I know from experience, that some smokers, will try to distract you into smoking again, this is probably cos they, themselves cant quit You prove to them that you can do it, and just maybe they will have a try eh

Im not sure whether that makes sense to you Salamah, but I'm the old boy on here, with 1 brain cell

I wish you all the best on your quit journey, and please keep us informed on your progress

Pete

[Salamah in reply to monky]

Thanks for the reply Pete!

I find when I tell people I have quit they want to have a discussion about it which doesnt help with distraction. I might try not bringing it up and if asked just say im a non smoker?

Think ill sit down tonight and make lots of plans!

Hehe You are giving great advice for 1 brain cell And congrats on 9 weeks, I cant wait to get to that point

[monky Administrator 35 Months Winner]

Hi again Salamah, Ive just found this blog from Emjay a while ago, it just might help you

Thinking about stopping smoking, stopping and staying stopped - its all a thinking game...

Posted by EmJay ROY CASTLE

20 Jan 2013

Stopping smoking isn't just always as simple and easy as making a decision to stop, putting out that last cigarette and then that's it, job done. If only.... There's a whole process to get through, not only leading up to quitting (preparing), there's also a 'middle' part (stopping) and then of course there's afterwards (staying stopped)

Depending on your reasons for wanting to (or sometimes having to) stop will determine how the process will leave you feeling - before, during and after.

For some people, giving up smoking isn't necessarily about the positive health benefits it can gain. It can quite often be to try and save money for a particuar reason, a holiday, more clothes, nicer things in life etc... sometimes it may simply be that this habit is no longer affordable and there are other important aspects of your life that the money needs to go towards.. Bills, food, clothes, etc

Sadly, if the reason for quitting is because it's become less affordable, then the person who is stopping smoking will quite often 'miss' smoking and feel that they really have 'given up something', as though they have had to sacrifice 'something' to get 'something' better

I think maybe if we can help this type of person to find another reason to stop smoking, a more selfish (in a positive way) reason so that they want to stop because they 'want to' rather than having to stop because they 'have to'... If that makes sense?

If you are of this kind of quitter, and you are doing it just for the money, say you win the lottery this week (fingers crossed, as you never know!) would you be more than likely to carry on smoking....?

If this is the case, then although we can help you to stop and you may never smoke again, it will be highly likely that you will always feel that your missing your (so called) friend. This means you'll never be totally free from smoking

It's really important to try and think about 'why' you smoke and 'what' you get out of it? What reasons can you think of that leads you to believe that smoking is something that you want to do for the rest of your life?

What do you actually enjoy about smoking? Remembering that the word 'enjoy' tends to lean towards something pleasurable. Is smoking really a pleasure? Some people actually think it is

Thinking about the financial and health benefits if quitting; The financial gains to quitting is quite unbelievable. Smoking is so costly these days. A 20-a-day smoker can save over £2,000 a year. However, the health gains are amazing and you definitely couldn't put a price on these benefits. Physically and mentally, the benefits are endless. Physically, the way your body makes a speedy recovery from the damage that smoking does to it is unbelievable. Within 20minutes things start to happen... Mentally, smoking makes us believe that we 'enjoy' it, it leads us to believe it makes us think straight, alleviates our depression, makes us happier... When really smoking causes us all the opposite of these problems and can lead to you feeling far worse.

Thinking about stopping smoking and staying stopped, it really can be just as simple or as hard as you make it...

Just the way you 'think' about it can determine how your journey goes....

So come on... Think about it ;-/

[jillygirl Administrator LONG TERM WINNER]

Hi Salamah, Welcome to the site. I think I would ask the person if they wouldn't mind not smoking too near you as you are trying to quit. Or you could tell a little white lie and say your asthmatic and smoke effects you. Good luck.