Ptsd const

I have been a member for a while and chose to write something for once. I was almost murdered on July 3rd 2015. It all came about after I'd slept with a guy of whom told me he was single. I found month's later he was almost married and settled down. He got caught cheating because he passed several diseases to this woman who I later found out had MS. I got the full blame for this and was unknown about the situation for months and was mentally terrorized by this guy and my next door neighbours for 7 months who knew him well. They used the adjoining attic to enter my home when I wasn't there at first and we're very clever the way they slowly drove me to a nervous wreck. I called the police on several occasions and I was taken for nothing more than a lunatic until 1 occasion I left an old phone on record while I was gone and I got the proof I thought would prove with several people talking about what they were planning. That "proof " became the need for me to be killed. The rest of what happened will take too long to tell. But to this day I have flash backs n night mates everyday/night and I feel nothing will make it go away, despite me on medication and often abuse it to knock me out at night time. X

2 Replies

  • Firstly, I'm so sorry you had to go through that. Don't ever think you deserved that. I completely understand the flash backs and how much that can dominate your life. I hope you are in a safer place now. If you can, I suggest trying out a free app called PTSD coach. I started using it and it has helped more than I can explain. If you can't get it, another thing to try is when you are having a flash back try breathing really deeply in your belly and try to slow down your thoughts. Easier said than done, I know, but try practicing it. You should be able to get better at it with time. When you're in the middle of one try to even say stop and freeze that thought and breathe your way out. Your brain likes to try and protect you by showing you your fears so it won't happen again. The more you understand your fears the easier it can be to live with them. I also understand wanting to "knock yourself out" at night but realize that avoiding it will only make it worse. You will get stronger, I know it. Take steps to help yourself now and you should get to a better place. I believe in you :)

  • thankyou TheaQ. It means alot 😊

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