Some days it's too overwhelming

[Cinderella80]

Hi friends hope you are all keeping strong. I'm writing this as my mum is sleeping. She will only be asleep for an hour then she and I will be awake all night once again. Her non sleeping seems to be getting worse. Most of the time she is saying stuff that doesn't make sense. It's so overwhelming and exhausting and utterly heart breaking. You have to be alert 24/7 to care for a loved one. I send you all so many hugs and so much love who are doing this hard job. It's hard enough already but seeing your loved ones getting more and more worse is so heart wrenching. Each day brings new challenges both mentally and physically. Hats off to you all. Keep strong. I need to take my own advice and keep strong also. It's so tough but we can do it. Sorry for the non productive ramble. No one to talk to. Just getting my thoughts out. 🌹🌷☀

[David750]

Yes that's how it was for me. So essential to get respite for yourself from time for a few hours at least, to help you cope. Can you get help overnight atleast once a week to give you a night's sleep. Tiredness makes caring more & more difficult. 🙏🙏

[Cinderella80 in reply to David750]

Hi Thankyou for taking the time out to respond. It's funny you should say that. For the first time ever I took the opportunity. Mybrother and his wife live with us he was out with a friend came home around midnight. Mum wasn't sleeping as usual so I suggested he sleep on the sofa while mum is in her hospital bed for a change. He tried to make an excuse but I quickly made my way upstairs in bed. The odd thing is she didn't get up once with him. I am back to being with mum and she only seems to be getting up when I'm around. My brother works nights so it won't be a regular thing. Not to mention his wife who is extremely unhelpful anyway. She had a face like a slapped bottom when she awoke at 2.00pm!

[Hidden in reply to Cinderella80]

’…. his wife who is extremely unhelpful anyway. She had a face like a slapped bottom when she awoke at 2.00pm!’

Priceless Cinderella. Simply priceless.

You are clearly a very sound and strong person. Stay strong.

Your observation about your mother not getting up when your reluctant brother slept on the sofa is rather important.

All I can say really is that your mother likely knows where the real love and care lies. Her up and down habits may simply be her realisation that you actually care. Vulnerability does that to us and so take heart. Your mother knows.

Your doing a good thing and its worthy of respect.

[Cinderella80 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for taking the time out to respond. There's only so much a person can take! Thank you for your kind words. Really appreciate it. 🌹

[LuisRodicioRodicio]

Hi Cinderella!

Follow to David750!

A big hug, luck, courage and a lot of help

Luis

[Cinderella80 in reply to LuisRodicioRodicio]

Thank you!

[emeraldgreen1]

Sending you so much strength and a big hug. You don't realise how strong you already are ❤️

[Cinderella80 in reply to emeraldgreen1]

Thank you for taking the time out to respond. Thank you so much for your kind words. 🌹

[Princess21266]

So sorry you are going through this. Are there any organizations (community care?) that might be able to provide some assistance?

[Cinderella80 in reply to Princess21266]

Thank you for taking the time out to respond. No one is helpful. Seems like everything is stretched. The sad thing is I have a sister in law living with us who works part time. She isn't even willing to help with the housework. And she also has a huge attitude problem which my brother is oblivious to. That attitude makes me dread waking up in the mornings. I've explained everything to her she can also see mum is getting worse but she seems to have no compassion for either of us. 😐

[sammy90210]

It's ok to just vent if you feel like it we've all had moments like these

But please try and find respite for yourself, even if it's for a few hours, ideally for a couple of days

[Cinderella80 in reply to sammy90210]

Thank you for taking the time out to respond. It's hard to get any sort of help. If the people living in the same house can't lend a helping hand or have any compassion then why would anyone else. 🌷

[David750]

Cinderella80, if you are in the UK, phone the PSP Association help desk 03000110122. They can aquaint you with all the support services in your area. Some of these are charities. I had the charity Crossroads (a lady to give my wife her lunch, read to her and paint her nails) for an afternoon allowing me to go to bed for a few hours or go for a walk.