Larry died this morning.: I woke this... - PSP Association

PSP Association

7,028 members9,586 posts

Larry died this morning.

Jeff166
Jeff166

I woke this morning around 5 hearing Larry call me in my dream. I got a call from hospice half an hour later that he died around that time. I went over with his cousin Diane and her husband Michael. I held him, caressed him and kissed him for 2.5 hours as we talked about him. He was still warm when we first got there. It's so hard to lose him but he is free of this ordeal. He never wanted this. Now I get to grieve.

I want to thank everyone on this site for all the support and information about PSP. He actually got off lucky. He never had pneumonia, a UTI or a bowel blockage. Or any of the many other possible things that could happen.

The photo is of us about 14 years ago. I like this photo. Shows him as he was. I am in front Larry is in back.

99 Replies
oldestnewest

Oh Jeff so sad, but at least he is away from this horrible illness, may he now rest in peace. So happy you could spend time with Larry after he passed. Now Jeff grieve for you loved one, cry when you feel the need, your post made me feel so sad for you. Yvonne xxxxx

Larry looks like such a vital, fun-loving guy, brimming with life...what a beautiful smile. My heartfelt condolences.

Jeff,

What a beautiful couple. So happy you found such a wonderful person to share your life with.

❤ Alice

Oh Jeff, I am so sorry. May Larry rest in peace finally free from this evil disease.

Now my dear, it is time for you to practice your hard learnt caring skills on yourself. Grieving is extremely tiring, rest as much as possible, you have the physical side of caring to get over, long before you can even start to think about the emotional side.

There is only one way to grieve and that is YOUR way, wallow in self pity, or paint the town red, anything in between works as well, as long as it's what you want to do. Nothing bar the essentials need to be done today, so if you don't feel ready, then don't do whatever!

No doubt you are in that wonderful numb bubble at the moment, accept and enjoy it.

Sending very large hug and much love

Lots of love

Anne

I'm so sorry to hear about his passing. My thoughts are with you this day as they had been these past days and weeks. This disease we have is hard on both us patients and our caregivers but after we ALL have finished with this disease, you the caregivers are left with an even harder task ahead of adjusting to life without us. Please, accept my sincere condolences and always remember the love and friendship that was Larry as you grieve.

I'm so sorry to hear that Jeff. He was clearly a very special person and you were blessed to have had so many good times together. As time passes those memories become more vivid.

Just go with the flow for the next few weeks.

Love from Jean xxx

He called you. He was with you. I believe in that. That's the most beautiful picture. So much love and happiness in it. My sympathies, Jeff. It's a terrible loss. Warm hugs to you. Be very kind to yourself now. Rest. Love, Sarah

Hi Jeff

You both look great... So much love there.

I'm thinking of you both.

His suffering is over and now, you have more loss to bare.

So sorry.

Wishing you what you need to get through this time.

Warmly

Kevin

That is a lovely photo! Thank you for sharing your story and advice with all of us during such difficult times. Your sense of humor is contagious and I admire how wonderful you were with Larry. As others have said, it’s time to transfer those caregiving skills to yourself now. It’s pretty amazing that you heard Larry calling you in your dream. Keep dreaming knowing that Larry is at peace.

We have a lot of hummingbirds here and when they appear I always say hello to the people I know who have passed. It’s a story that I will share about my mom some day. I’m not ready to do that yet. However, I will add Larry to my list and say hello to him when the hummers hum by.

Jeff, This is heartbreaking news and I will be thinking of you often. I’m so sorry for your loss.

Take care of yourself!

❤️ I SewBears

The day my Henry died, while the nurse and I were dressing him, the aide, all unaware of the hummingbird link to PSP, filled my hummingbird feeder with nectar that she had thoughtfully prepared at her home the night before and hung it for the first time of the year. There was a hummingbird there when I passed the window shortly after. It meant something to me.

...And may God hold you in the palm of His hand. I am so sorry for your loss.

Blessings,

Christine

My heart goes out to you during this difficult time

Karen

You have my deepest condolences. You went above and beyond caring for Larry. He is at peace now.

Ron

Love and hugs to you Jeff, Larry is now free xxxx

Dear Jeff

Sending lots of love and a big hug at this difficult time. Be gentle on yourself

Love Tippy

This site makes me cry. I’m so sorry for you Jeff that you have lost Larry.

In the same circumstances that I lost my David, whilst he was in respite care while I could take a break.

He was obviously ready to go, and as someone said to me two years ago, maybe he didn’t want to put you through the moment.

You have been THE most wonderful carer for him, and he will have appreciated that so much.

Such a nice photo that you have taken the time to post.

Now, it’s the time to begin to care for yourself, as several people have already said. All the jobs will be there whenever, so just stop for a bit and take the time to Grieve and to look after yourself.

Then take a deep breath and give Larry the sendoff he deserves.

We are all here for you if you need to ask anything, you know that, but we also know that you might need to take yourself away for a bit. Do what’s right for you.

Bug hugs for you.

Derek

A kind face you have, Jeff.

The photo is wonderful.....I like

Los Angeles, CA, USA

Dear Jeff, I didn’t log on this morning (I’m in Northern California) because I didn’t want to see your news. I just logged on now and I am so so very sorry for you and yet relieved that Larry no longer has to deal with this damn disease. Please take care of yourself and live with memories of the good days.

Lots of love and warm enveloping hugs.

Caroline

Praying for peace and comfort for you.

JEFF,

Sorry to hear of Larrys passing .You did a great job taking care of Larry

Remember memories will get you trough this terrible time .

Take care of yourself, God bless you and keep you in His loving care. .

xxoo

Maria Elena

Sorry for your loss. Sending lots of hugs xx

Hidden
Hidden

Jeff it just seems so quick,I do hope your heart heals in time.

You are in my thoughts

Dee

Sending you love❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Hi Jeff,

sending you lots of hugs and strength to get through the next few days , weeks , months.

Thinking of you.

Dawn, xx

Very sorry for your loss Jeff. My sincerest condolences to you and Larry’s family.

Kerry

Oh Jeff so sorry my heart goes out to you hope you’re ok you did everything and he was so lucky to have you as his carer

God bless you 💕

I'm so sorry for your loss. Loved your picture, you look like such a happy couple. I'm guessing you have many happy memories of your life together. They will help you through this sad time. It's time now to start taking care of yourself. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Pat

Sending love and cyber support from Ireland 🇮🇪 I’ve read your messages and it’s clear you’ve looked after and loved Larry immensely. My father Harry will transfer from hospital to a hospice tomorrow for Pallative care he’s deterioration has been rapid, his swallow is gone and speech is very difficult and inaudible. PSP is a thief that steals everything but their spirits will soar and hopefully they will meet somewhere over the rainbow 🌈🙏🏻💔🤗

Oh that is so sad. Prayers to you and all family x

Oh Jeff,

May he rest in peace!

Love and light.

Mxx

My thoughts are with you and your families

💕💕

Such sad news this morning.

That's a lovely photo of you both.

Look after yourself xxxx

So sorry to hear your news but Larry is now free of this dreadful disease. Just now look after yourself x

My heart goes out to you. I have been following your posts since cbd diagnosis 3 years ago. I hope My end is as peaceful.let yourself have time to grieve,you deserve that after all you’ve done.big hugsxx

Goodnight, God Bless Larry 💙

You must have wonderful memories to help you along this sad rollercoaster ride.

Take care x

Jeff I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you find comfort that called to you Larry and he is now free from the grip of this awful disease. I'm glad you got to be his spouse again and were able to hold him.

Thank you for sharing a lovely photo, you were blessed to have had each other.

Now please take care of yourself.

Lots of love , Nanny 857xx

I've just read your previous posts of this week.

I can't imagine what you are feeling right now but I can imagine there are many conflicting emotions & deep heartbreak. This is a normal response & grief.

Thank you for sharing a photo of you both & a fond memory.

We are here when you need us.

Hugs 🤗

Keep them memories close to your heart, knowing he called out to you is so precious. Take care of yourself just as Larry would have wanted you too.

Sending hugs and strength to get through this sad time.

Sarah xx

Oh dear Jeff

You have been a rock for Larry. Please take solace from the fact that he is now free from this horrid illness. All your PSPA friends are with you in spirit as you grieve.

Thoughts, prayers and hugs

Anne x

I’m so sorry

What a lovely photo. Sincere condolences for your loss, may you remember far happier and healthier times. Sending love 💗

Dearest Jeff i am so sad about Larry. You had so much love together and to hear him in your dream is remarkable and amazing. God bless to you both. Love Joy xxx

So very sorry for your loss, sending love and hugs Xx

Jeff

I am so sorry, you must feel shell shocked. Thinking of you & wishing you strength to get through the days ahead.

The photo is lovely, gives you a real sense of Larry and shows the love & affection you have each for each other.

Wish I was able to do something practical for you as you have helped me so much with your posts but I'm the wrong side of the pond. Sending you love & hugs

Alison xxx

Xxx

Deepest sympathy.

x

Sorry for your loss take care xx

Dearest Jeff... lovely photo of the two of you...

At first Words failed me this morning as l read of Larry's passing...

But l decided to share a little true story. Years ago in the middle of the day l saw three floating figures... they seemed benevolent... none had facial features but the one in the middle seemed familiar... l asked what they wanted - no answer. I asked why they were there - no answer. Then they were gone. I was puzzled to say the least but not afraid. About 30 minutes later l got a call... my father had died.

A close friend tried to explain my experience... he said the two figures where guiding him to his next destination... l accepted the explanation in my heart. Personally, l think Larry connected with you in your dream. I hope you Treasure that possibility. Sending gentle hugs to you & Larry... Granni B

So sorry to hear your sad news. My sister died the same way no pneumonia or infection. It was such a shock for us all but at least she didn't suffer and the same for Larry. Take care xx

Jeff, what a wonderful photo to have as you look back on the good times in coming days and months. Larry suffers no more but you have a loss to bear. My sympathy to you and Diane and all who mourn him.

Marilyn

Oh Jeff. This is the news I knew was coming but didn't want to hear. Your love for each other will, hopefully, carry you through the coming times. May he Rest In Peace. Sending prayers and hugs to you all. 🙏🙏💔💔

My condolences. My love and peace to you and your family.

Dear Jeff, my deepest, heartfelt condolences to you in Larry's passing. He and the love you shared will always be with you.

We all thank you and Larry for sharing your journey with us as we traveled this illness road called PSP.

Please let us share with you your grief and know we are all hear for you. You are a remarkable man just as Larry was. Much love to you and peace to Larry.

I am so sorry for your loss !!

May he Rest In Peace !!

free from this horrible disease . so sorry sending lots of hugs

So very sorry for your loss Jeff.

Hugs and prayers - Tim

Dear Jeff,

So proud of you and we grieve with you. Larry is free from the grasp of PSP. You were a stalwart and his strength. May memories of your love sustain you in the days ahead.

We are here for you. Praying for you and your family.

Cuttercat

❤️

Jeff, he was blessed to have such a loving carer as you and you can always remember that in your heart!

Hold on to all the good times you have had!

My deepest condolences. Janet

Jeff ...I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers....So sad for you...

Liz

Jeff,

I am just so sorry you have lost Larry. Rejoicing that he is free of his body that no longer served him. Losing our loved ones is so hard but following this type of disease and this high level of caregiving, it must be a very different experience.

As someone else said, grieve in your own way, no matter what that is. First, I hope that you get lots of rest. I hope you have family or friends close by to spend some time with.

When you are able, please stay in touch with us if it's not too painful. You have been a mainstay since I've been on this site.

Blessings, Joy

So sorry for your loss, he is in peace now. Take care. Nettie

Beautiful sending on- peace at last. Take as best care of yourself as you can and allow others to support you now as you grieve and heal. Do it your way-there is no right or wrong and no time frame for you feelings. If you feel joy in his release from the disease its ok, no judgment. It sounds like you took amazing care of Larry, you were both very fortunate to have each other. Hugs, Pat

Hidden
Hidden

Oh Jeff, I'm so sorry. We all know it's coming but that doesn't make it any easier.

You cared for Larry so well and he knew that. It's his turn to walk beside you and guide you now.

He will be there, every step of the way.

Be good to yourself.

Sending you big hugs and lots of love at this very sad time.

Sue x

Sorry to hear your news..you cared for Larry with love and a good sence of humour when the going got tough. Thinking about you ,..Brenda xxx

Jeff, I love that Larry called out to you as he passed from this world to the next. He was still with you spiritually even though he was not able to be with you physically.

I’m sure there are some tough days ahead for you. I will keep you in my prayers. Just remember the love.....

Hugs,

Cindy

Dear Jeff

I am so sorry to hear this. I think it’s beautiful that he called out to you and that you were able to be with him after his passing. Take good care of yourself now and take head of all the good advice on here. Stay on here as I have found it so helpful through both Steve’s illness and now my grieving for him.

Sending you lots of love and hugs and I love the photo of you both.

Love Sarahxxx

Sorry for your loss.

Dear Jdef, i am not fluently in English . I send you a warm and big hug.

Elena

So sorry for your lost, Larry was very special you,the selective way psp attacks people is so hard,the separation from your love one will hard.

It's time to grieve ,time to remember happy times,renew your strength

God grant you peace in the road ahead .x Peter and Kathy

Jeff, I first joined this online resource because of your posts. You are the most caring individual I have been made aware of and I couldn't help but admire your courage, love and resilience. My heart goes out to you. I will remember you and your fight for Larry forever and hope it will help me through my attempts to emulate you in my care of David.

Jeff, I send my deepest condolences. My dear Steve is on this journey and my heart breaks every day. I hope I have the love and grace you showed to Larry throughout this bitter trek.

wow ~ so sorry🥀

That’s a beautiful pic of both of you.

Let your old memories be your strong support in this time as you bid a farewell to Larry from this world.

May Larry rest in peace.

Anshuman

Jeff, Deepest condolences on your loss.

You were such a steadfast, caring, dedicated partner for Larry!

What a beautiful couple the two of you were! My condolences on your loss.

You have been a wonderful spouse to Larry, your sorrow will be great, in addition to perhaps relief, give it time.

I hope that by the time the bulbs in your garden flower, your sorrow will be reduced and that only the beautiful memories with Larry will prevail.

Thanks for being an example for me with your responses on this site.

a warm hug, Elvira

A big hug.

Luis

Sorry for your loss man. Lovely photo.

Richard x

❤️ XxxX

So sorry for your loss. Sending you love & hugs at this sad time xxx

So sorry jeff. What a long journey you have had.

You both look lovely in your photo. Happy smiles to remember always

Sending so much love to you . Rest a little while now dear man

Love lynda ❤

Hi Jeff I know what you are going through I lost my husband 8 weeks ago from psp and have cried everyday since we were married for 53 years and have a pain in the pit of my stomach as you must have. They say that time heals I'm not sure if it will sending you my love x

🎈❤️Our prayers are with you as you grieve his passing.

Our condolences are with you. Please let me know if we can help in this difficult time in any matter.

We are in Philadelphia.

Take care, Rita

Jeff,

My most sincere condolences. You have been an awesome carer. I really mean that. I hope I am half as good as you have been these last couple of years. And you guys made a great couple. Larry looks like a great guy with a lot of character.

Take care of yourself now and take the time to grieve. I know you haven't had much time to yourself in a long time.

I will be thinking about both of and sending love and prayers your way.

Sincerely, Dick

What a beautiful photo and memories so dear. Larry may now fly high but he will never leave your heart. Sending you much love and thoughts

Denise x

Jeff.

Such happy memories. What a beautiful photo. So sorry for your loss and how special that Larry visited you in your dreams. What a special connection you both had

My friend lost his young daughter a few years ago and I remember her saying to him. Daddy when I die my pain will end but yours will just be beginning. How true and such an special words from a 9 year is girl.

It’s true our pain begins when someone dies and as others point out now it is your time.

If tears are diamonds we are all rich beyond our wildest dreams. So catch each one, it’s a precious memory. Larry lives on in your heart.

Be strong. Look after yourself.

Hugs and love

Caz x

Jeff, I know you don’t know me but I have read your posts since joining this group. I am so very sorry for your loss. You have created a very vivid picture of Larry and it was so obvious how much you love him. Thank you for sharing your experience and life with us.

Dearest Jeff. I only just got back from a few days away with my family and was so very, very sorry to see this post. He was so lucky to have had you and all the wonderful care and support you gave him when he became ill. What a lovely photo of happier days. I hope that soon happy memories will take over the deep hurt and loss that I know that you are now feeling. We are all here for you as it is you who now needs the love and support. Big hug. AliBee xxx

Jeff, I don’t come in this site very often but when I do, I am always so impressed to see your devotion to Larry. I am so sorry for your loss.

xoDorie

I’m so very sorry for your loss, Jeff. There are no words that help, but you can tell how much this community cares for you and Larry.

Peace, healing and hugs for this sorrowful time.

❤️❤️❤️. Anne G.

So sorry for your loss. He looked a lovely happy chap. You will have lots of lovely memories I am sure. I lost my Ken 2 months ago. Know how you must feel. Best wishes. Pat

So sorry for your loss,take care,Acorneater.

Dearest Jeff

I have just read your post and send you love. I am so sorry that Larry has left you but know that amongst the grief you will be pleased his (and your) ordeal is over.

It won't be easy but you will cope knowing he is out of pain and struggling.

It is 2 years this month since I lost Les. I am slowly coming to terms with it now. I have a grief counsellor to thank for how I feel now. Take however long you need to recover. I have been lucky to have support from everyone in this forum and I am sure you will find the way forward.

Love and hugs

Pat xx

Oh Jeff!!! I’m just seeing this news - I’ve been offline the past week! I am so very sorry! I’m trying to wrap by brain around this .... I was so happy to see that you were getting a week, and that Larry was in capable hands to offer this much needed time for you.

I pray that you can find yourself again. Larry had his angel on earth, having you to care for him so selflessly —- now He’s resting without pain.

I will be praying for you friend on this new journey ... surround you with angels. Xo

Love the picture too Jeff. So sorry for your loss x

I have not been following this site closely the last few months since losing Kurt but am always touched by the kindness and love in the posts I read. Sending you hugs and Light, to bring you peace and healing as you recover from your loss. Kathy

Dear Jeff. Just wanted you to know that i am sending you lots of love and a virtual hug. Love AliBee x

So sorry for your loss, Jeff.. thoughts and prayers for comfort and peace

You may also like...