Advice and help please for my Dad

Can anyone please help me with words as my youngest daughter is sad and doesn't want to talk about her Grandpa as it makes she upset and sad .she goes quite and switches of to a different subject and hates talking about it .

She surprises me as she is a very very happy free spirit young daughter 9 years old but extremely sensible and more like a 12/13 year old as she looks up to her eldest sister with much love and admiration as her eldest sister is truly a wonderful magic beautiful young lady .

My youngest is very sensitive and can cry a second if something upsets her and very hard to calm down like myself. She is very like me however she is very strong too like myself I'dlike to believe.

We have a opportunity to go and see him at the care home this Saturday and surprise him .She would especially light up his world and make his day I know he would keep smiling at her and just be so happy he asks after her all the time when I and my eldest daughter see him it's heartbreaking. I don't want my youngest to regret not seeing him when the end is here and she has been brilliant with seeing him up too some time ago as we have had much family trauma at home but alas I'm so happy we are working hard and pulling through and together as a family so much as we all love each other to bits and pieces forever. I know my youngest daughter and Grandpa love each other also dearly of course .It's heartbreaking .Encourage yes that's what we are doing not saying to her you must you have too that would be unfair to make any human do something they don't want to do especially children however in our situation with Dad her grandpa I feel it's so important she's sees him .I feel torn guilty and heartbreaking to see my daughter not seeing him and especially of course my dad not seeing his youngest granddaughter. I know this is a long post and feel blessed I can talk to people on a psp journey we are going through in unique but many similar ways .

I need to look after myself as previously mentioned I've just had a very big operation and need recovery time and also having Bipolar disorder and ocd feel trapped and crippled in this way .my health rapidly and had a ripple effect with other many family members going through this journey also their health I'd imagine greatly affected physically and emotionally and I take my hats to the elder ones having to care for your partners in every way WOW if possible depend on your each and every individual personal circumstances.

So sorry but please if you can take all this post in and process my word I don't think I can ADVICE AND HELP PLEASE I'm desperate to keep them both happy and do the right thing xxxx

I'm at home so have a little more time on my hands than usual as having to rest and think about life hence been on this forum lots xxxx

4 Replies

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  • I want to Respect my daughter and we all do but encourage sooooo much even more and more but I can't do the impossible and my mum says to me 'theres no right or wrong way '.

    Oh my gosh what can I do ? X

  • Oh and me again wanted also to say obviously as any one as a PARENT wants to protect their children always but at the same time not wrap them in a bubble .Life is life so good and bad will always happen in life.

    And children need to learn to make them strong for life .

    Xxx

  • Hi if your dad can talk maybe you could record a message on your cellphone and replay it to your daughter

  • Our youngest grandson was 9 when his granddad was diagnosed. They were really close. He was devastated when his granddad could no longer play football with him. Now, like all our grand children, he kisses him and likes him to be around but they don't really talk to him. Chris doesn't talk.

    They all understand the disease and I always answer any questions truthfully.

    Have you thought of your little girl talking to a school counsellor ?

    I often think it would have been easier if Chris had died suddenly and they were left with memories of a vigorous granddad.

    xx

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