PSP causing angry moods

[Sharli]

Help! My mum who has PSP & I care for has just started behaving very angry, abusive and refusing to cooperate, does anyone have any suggestions how to cope with this

[abirke]

See her dr. tell of the change in behavior and they may put her on an anti depressant.

B has not had a change in behavior but I do hear that it can be a common event in the life of PSP/

Remember your mom is going through this as much as you are and it may be probably is quite traumatic for her. Her feelings are burning out. Pretty soon you'll wonder if she's feeling anything , emotionally speaking

Good luck. Take her to her dr And take care of yourself make sure youve got resources to help you be and stay happy .

AVB

[Sharli in reply to abirke]

Thanks for your reply, mum is already on anti depressants, unfortunately she has refused her meds, food & drinks for 4 days now, doctor says there is nothing they can do as she refuses to go to hospital, it's breaking my heart! It's good to know others know what I'm going through, thank you

[honjen43]

Is she doing things her way, or your way that works better for you? Suggest you use back door tactics and try and get her to think your way is her idea! Try using tactics to deal with a 2 year old! Just don't tell mum. If common sense tactics don't work, get some professional help. Above all, don't feel it's your fault! It is PSP! Others on this site are bound to have be able to help you. Thinking of you. Take care of yourself!

[Sharli in reply to honjen43]

Thanks for advice, will try it, fingers crossed

[tonydixo]

yes i look after my wife whith PSP and get abuse every day

[abirke in reply to tonydixo]

Oh Tony, Im sorry. Sounds like you are the one who needs soem help...No one ,even carers, deserves to be abused. Take mama to the dr and get her on a small dsg. of somethingl

[loppylugs5 in reply to abirke]

I think it is frustration that makes sufferers insufferable.We eventually got the help of a psychiatrist who prescribed one antidepressant which did not work then quetiapine which did the trick so all peaceful here mostly though he doesn't like people crowding him he feels threatened.

If your Dr doesn't offer you a referral you might get help from your local memory clinic.Don't put yourself in danger just out of loyalty.It is not your Mum behaving badly it is this awful disease working on her imagination.

Hope you get help soon,Px

[Sharli in reply to tonydixo]

Hi Tony, well done for taking care of your wife you must be a beautiful person, my thoughts are with you

[tonydixo in reply to Sharli]

thanks sharli

[sammy90210]

Talking to the doctor is very important - remember, PSP patients can get frustrated and cannot communicate pain or distress - patients can get constipated or develop hemorrhoids which can cause pain and delirium, that needs to be checked and avoided too (sorry) - eventually you need to find a way to talk to her like a child without letting her feel patronized - PSP patients' mental age keeps getting less so you should talk patiently and kid around, try and deflect the anger but also make sure you can locate a cause for physical pain, if there is one - check the body for bruises, patients can't tell where they hurt - you should touch each part of the body and ask if it hurts there - best wishes, it's tough

BTW, it's "normal" for patients to develop a temper, hurl abuse to their closest ones and take sadistic pleasure in seeing others in distress (the last one I found funny, I'd tell my dad I'm telling on him to his elder sister, that used to get a laugh out of him)

[abirke in reply to sammy90210]

Well said Sammy , well said!

[Tippyleaf]

Dear Shari

Feel for you, my hubby personality has changed so much, anger physical and verbal aggression were never who he was but the new PSP version sadly is. Like others on the site we sought help from medication antidepressants and night time sedation take the edge off . In addition he started seeing the counsellor at the hospice who really has brought a little calm into our lives. We sometimes see the counsellor together to address issues but mainly it is his time and space, though with deteriorating speech not sure for how much longer he will be able to talk to the counsellor.

Do take care of yourself, big hug xxx

[Sharli in reply to Tippyleaf]

Thank you for your kind reply, will try get a counsellor to come to house to talk to mum, maybe to talk to my children as well as the verbal abuse affects them as well

[D0ttieL0ttie]

Speak to your GP, or Consultant in charge of her care. It might be due to medication she is on. It could also be a symptom of this disease, If it is the latter they can medicate. My husband is on Lamotrigine to balance his aggression and behaviour.

BUT THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO REMEMBER is that this behaviour is a cause of her illness and is not her fault and so you need to work out coping strategys.

When my husband 'misbehaves' as I now call it! I try to use humour. I say things to him like 'I'm such a bad wife' or 'Gosh your looking gorgeous today' that makes him laugh (sometimes). Or if it gets too much make sure she is safe and tell her you are taking time out, even if is just a cup of tea in another room or the garden.

[Sharli in reply to D0ttieL0ttie]

Hi Dottie, Im not sure mum would react well to humour at the moment, she hits at me now & tells me she hates me & to get out of her room, her GP keeps telling me there is nothing they can do for her, but I will ask about changing her meds, any ideas on how to get her to take them?

[D0ttieL0ttie in reply to Sharli]

Oh sweetie my heart goes out to you. If she won't take them whole try putting them in a soft sweet, PSP gives a sweet tooth. Take very good care of yourself. xxxxx

[vlh4444]

Sharli I do sympathise. I think it's THE hardest thing to deal with and does seem to affect a lot (but not all) PSP sufferers. We have found one antidepressant a day does help a bit but it is still a problem. The sad thing is that, although you know it is caused by the illness, you can't help feeling hurt by it when all you're doing is trying your best.

Vicki

[Sharli in reply to vlh4444]

Thanks Vicki for caring

[laila123]

i played music as your mum is feeling frustradted it is hard for us to understand i lost it with jhon once he cried said he didnt mean it but felt it hard to say what he wanted to say i no my advice may not help you but i nno what your going through get as much help as you can take care thoughts with you

[Sharli in reply to laila123]

Haven't tried music yet will give it a go, thanks

[Gracie_Girl]

I, too, am dealing with this with my sister. She admits she likes making me mad. The frustration can be polarizing. I took her to psychiatrist and psychologist. It has helped her and me.

[Sharli in reply to Gracie_Girl]

Hi Gracie, yes will try some counselling, I think mum is giving up, she is continually saying she wants to die, this is hard to hear

[Gracie_Girl in reply to Sharli]

Yes, I know. The first time my sister grabbed me in a hug and said "I'm afraid of dying. What happens when you die?", I just about died. I really didn't know how to answer that question. That's one of the reasons I took her to a psychologist. And it was also a recommendation by her neurologist. There isn't anything about this disease that is easy to deal with, but some things feel insurmountable. Thank goodness, I'm seeing a psychologist too, to keep me sane. He's kept me from jumping off the deep end a lot of times. Lol! All I can do is, keep trying and take a break.

[Sharli in reply to Gracie_Girl]

Thanks Gracie, your reply made cry, it's good to know that others are going through this, thank you x

[Hidden]

I find my husband gets very mad and aggressive when I tell him what I want to do and he will refuse to do it. An aide said to me, "always give him a choice. Do you want this now or later, pills with water or applesauce, and so on." That way he feels he still has some control of his life and is running the show. It's not easy to do deal with this but this helps a little. Good luck. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

[Tttp]

Hi Sharli sorry you are having such a time with your mom, what I understand with PSP is that they can be sad abusive, cry and just not be in a very good mood or they can be happy laugh smile I think it is one of the many things with PSP. Take care. Nettie

[fletchnojob]

My husband is the opposite. He sends me to Coventry and won’t talk to me at all.