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Most recent update on hellish few days

Firstly many many thanks for all of your support

It's 3.30am in the uk and I'm at the hospital with dad, mum and I are doing separate shifts!

We will not leave dad because he is extremely scared!!!!

Mum is about to have her first 8 hour break/sleep so far we've been coping on 2 hours each per 24 hours, today I've decided that's stops! We will both now go home at seperate times for 9 hours whilst the other one remains with dad

So update on my beautiful very frightened dad....in A & E on Monday the X-ray they "don't think" showed any blockage but after a serpository (wrong spelling prob I'm v tired) "some" poo came out, a lot was manual pulled out! However there is still LOADS left despite emimas and loads of different laxatives!

The being sick continues bringing up poo (very watery) so sorry for the info!!

So yday morning they decided they needed to insert a tube up the nose down the throat to remove what's coming up to avoid aspiration

Unfortunately this was a truly God awful experience that dad was unable to tolerate and I felt it soooo wrong to put him through that, they said they'd come back later to try again, I calmed dad down

Mum returned and I explained what happened and after speaking to the surgeon he explain it has to be done to avoid aspiration! My dad has refused to have another try and do you know what I don't blame him!!! I've told him he is rather unwell now and without the treatment could become very unwell, I haven't explained the details or the fact that he could die!

The palliative care team have been changed certain meds and have put in an anti sickness drug attached to dads leg with a box....

Last night about 6pm dad suddenly informed me there are 7 cats out there outside that window (the view from the window shows other parts of the building in hospital and Windows, not close enough to see into) initially I was like what? No can't have heard that right and asked dad to repeat it and he said the same thing and that there had only been 3 cats in the morning.......oh s**t, spoke to nurse she said he was hallucinating, before I left he tod me one cat had just fallen down...oh god

Anyway he's now asleep 

We are still waiting for all this poo which apparently there is still loads of to appear!

I've been told we are in for to long haul and that dad is very ill and things will now start to decline further (please dear lord let my dad sleep and rest in peace) I do not want my dad suffering anymore nor does my mum!!

Dad thinks he will be dying very soon

We are NOT God so I don't know but I do know this is totally unfair and I'm finding it hard not to crack!

My love and best wishes to you all and I will update you again when I know more X 

16 Replies

Massive hugs to you all. Having just experienced nearly 6weeks in hospital with Mum I know how exhausting it is. I to wouldn't leave Mum but as only me had to at night so I could try to get some sleep. Good plan for you and your mum to get good chunks of time of rest at home. You need to look after yourselves too. 

I'm so sorry to hear your darling Dad is Having to suffer this poo trauma. It truly is awful having to watch them be cleared out as so uncomfortable for them. Mum really couldnt understand what the hell was going on but said it was so painful. Loads of morphine had to be given. 

I pray that your Dad is soon rid of all this poo and this pain and whatever path this horrid illness now takes for him is not a long suffering one. 

Mum also hallucinated when in hospital. Since coming home that has more or less ceased. Her thing was ants everywhere and strange people talking in groups about her. 


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Awe thank you for your reply

Such a hard time

Stress levels go through the roof

Hugest hugs x

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So very sorry shame the people that did not help earlier can't do a shift at sitting with your Dad they would be so much better at their job afterwards.I send love to you and your Mum.Px

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Lol loopy lugs that is so funny

I'm not joking I'm going to ring them tomw and tell her just that!!

Thank you x


This sounds similar to S's time in hospital.  Although he didn't have the sickness. Just totally blocked.  Eventually an enema did work.  Now on lots of Latulose and regular enema.  That does seem to be doing the trick.  I really hope they don't do more of these invasive treatments, only any good, if they work the first time.

Thinking of you and sending big hug and much love at this very worrying time.

Glad that you and your Mum are getting as much rest as is possible.

Lots of love


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Thx u Heady

Dad actually a bit better today

Poo is slow but happening, hoisting is helping because of gravity 

Dad had never been hoisted til yday so slowly he will get used to it

Finally today dad has had 2 cups of tea, a supplement meal drink type thing n some ice cream

Being sick has not happened for 24 hours

Wish they'd just put the anti sickness box on before sticking tubes up his poor nose!! Honestly I'm so angry at the moment! 

This hospital business is very stressful and tiring and I can't be dealing with any moody staff! I'm knocking any disrespectful behaviour "bang on their heads" straight away! I'm just not allowing it to happen

From now we've moved to doing a 12/13 hour shift each n then 12/13 hours at home, think that will work better as it is the sleep just isn't breaking the surface!

Don't worry my darling I'm not allowing anymore invasive treatment!! It's not on and pointless in my opinion!

The palliative care team are amazing!

The hallucinations are still happening, I've calmed down a bit about that now

So here we are its about 1am n I'm here til 1pm tomw

Time to catch up on the forum I hope (well whilst dads asleep anyway)

Thank again

Love and best wishes X 


Are they just giving enemas?  Or is some laxatives being given as well? I was told they had to treat the blockage from both ends to get it all moving!  S is a lot better now.  Even going by himself.  Hasn't had to have an enema for over a week.  Hospice got a few words out of him yesterday!  His personal trainer can get him to walk and do his exercises.  Me? he just sits there while I try and get food into him, will barely even take the food off the spoon! Hope, even though you are sat by his bed all the time, you are getting some sleep.  Buy a neck collar, that you would use on a plane, no need for you to be awake if Dad is sleeping! And take regular meal breaks.

Lots of love



Yeah loads of laxatives too

I know now if they were to remove the anti sickness drug dad will still be sick n then obviously the worst can happen

Bless you and S it's so bloody difficult when they'll do things for the professionals but not us!

I'm eating ok just s**t lol

Sleep well slowly I'm sorting that out

Thx u heady for all your support means so much X


It sounds horrendous. I can't say anything to help but send my love and hugs.

Jean xxx

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Thx you jean

It helps reading your kind words



I'm so sorry you're all going through this traumatic experience. Your poor dad!

My prayer is that one way or another, all discomfort will end very soon and that you will all be able to sleep.

Love and hugs to you all.


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Thx U NannaB

It is bloody awful for my dad and I just feel it's so unfair to such a beautiful person

We will get through this one way or the other I hope....X 

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Sending love and hugs heart breaking time x

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Thx u black cushion

It's appreciated x


So sorry you are all going through this painful time, I pray your dad will feel comfortable soon x

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Me too thx u x

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