Coping with anxiety: I think I should... - Positive Wellbein...

Positive Wellbeing During Self-Isolation

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Coping with anxiety

Roukaya profile image
20 Replies

I think I should try to refrain from airing my anxieties on this site .

If I am troubled I tend to think of the worst case scenario and as I live in isolation , I have no one to talk to

I realise I have anxiety issues and it is for me to learn how to deal with these problems as abs when they occur .

This is why I kept away from the site before my exam results came out because I did not wish to repeat myself.

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Roukaya
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20 Replies
Midori profile image
MidoriVisually impaired

Hi Roukaya,

Don't suffer in silence, this is what we are here for. If you are troubled it is better to post about it, rather than suffer on your own.

Cheers, Midori

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to Midori

Good evening

I hope you are well

Thank you for listening

It is was not for missing one exam and leaving my home over Christmas I would have gone away for Christmas

But now we all have to wait for the end of Lockdown

How did Hallowe’en go for you

I remember you said you had your costume

Midori profile image
MidoriVisually impaired in reply to Roukaya

Normally I would set up a grotto for the local kids, but it is my first year here in Wales and I was unsure if it might be disapproved of.

As the weather was appalling, wind and torrential rain, I chickened out and set up a smaller one than usual in the bay window of my house!

Heard several admiring comments from folk passing, but my candy cauldron remained untouched, as we had been asked by the Welsh Government to keep the handouts to a minimum as we are in lockdown until Monday.

Firework night seems quite lively though, been watching a few of the local displays!

Cheers, Midori

Hi Roukaya, It's a great ideal to say that you realise your problem and that you are going to resolve it for yourself, but please don't withdraw from the community if it helps you. We all have good days and bad days. Periods when we cope well and other times when we struggle. So don't feel that you are in any way a failure if you need to post and get some support. That is why we are here when all is said and done... to help each other! 🙏

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to

Thank you for your understanding

I will continue to seek support from this invaluable site

Counsellor profile image
Counsellor

Hi

The worst thing you can do is keep all your feelings inside. Maybe you could see if there is a listening service or counselling charity in your area?

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to Counsellor

I am quite a religious abs spiritual person

I can try counselling but really the power to change from from deep within

Midnight-Blue profile image
Midnight-Blue

Hey, do you are the only one who “vents” here? This is a safe place: if we’re interested & can help you (similarly problem, similar thought process, etc) we will send your a reply. And, just by sharing yourself (Which in itself is a giant leap for a lot of people.), you might be helping something else. Do, please stay, grab a comfortable chair and relax & talk to us whenever you would like.

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to Midnight-Blue

Thank you

I will continue to seek hope and understanding from this site ad and when necessary

ddmagee1 profile image
ddmagee1

It has been my experience, for over 60 years, that if I have anxieties, troubling issues, it makes all the difference, as to how well I can cope, when I have somebody to talk to and/or write to, concerning my anxieties and troubling concerns. To keep it all in, I found, is not helpful! With this COVID-19 self-isolation, it has not been easy to reach out for help, when I have felt overwhelmed with anxieties! Then, when I have an empathetic, understanding, non-judgmental person (s), that I can discuss things with, who I trust, it helps lessen the burden, and can help solve some difficulties that are bothersome to me! I enjoy and treasure my HealthUnlocked.com forum friends! I learned long ago isolating myself completely from sharing some of life’s problems, can create a heavy burden, where I may not see a solution to help myself with anxieties, and/or problems. I hope you will reconsider your approach to dealing with anxieties, and thinking of a worse case scenario, where you can reach out to others, like on this forum, for example, to help ease your difficulties. Perhaps, talking with your primary physician, about your concerns, could be an additional help for you! Wishing you the best, and hope you will find a comfortable solution, which will be beneficial, for you and your well-being!

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to ddmagee1

Thank you for your understanding and much appreciated

It is a valuable site for those who are alone and isolated or who just lack motivation

Many on here are kinder than my own relatives

ddmagee1 profile image
ddmagee1 in reply to Roukaya

Yes, I know exactly what you mean, in reference to relatives!

Jenpow profile image
Jenpow

Please let yourself air your anxietys. I live alone and know how hard it is if you cant talk out your feelings. If you tell them it can help.

Sending hugs and hope you have a good day today. Take it one day at a time. X

MaggieSylvie profile image
MaggieSylvie

Hi Roukaya, What Midori has written is true. Do keep in touch.

I haven't seen any postings from you for quite a while and just went off searching for you. You have so many "ifs and buts" in your life at the moment that I can well relate to how you're feeling. I have been having dreadful problems too, and was wondering whether you can answer a legal question for me.

Can my partner change the executors on our mirror wills without discussing the change with me? We've talked about this before and it is something I heard he had done just now while speaking on the phone. This is one of my lesser problems but I would like to know what is going on.

Hopefully, your tenant will recover quickly and the rent will not be affected. This is all you need after the trouble she gave you moving in. I would think the least she can do is to reassure you.

Regarding your job application, perhaps they want to open up "offices" outside London but need staff before they can do that. I hope you sent off your CV to them in London. Stay safe and don't be a stranger. Big virtual hugs.

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to MaggieSylvie

Good Afternoon

I hope you are well

I have read your post with interest and I think I am going through the premenopausal stage and I am beginning to realise may be why I am feeling very tired and anxious

Thank you for asking

I took two exams I scored 42.5 percent in Admin of Estates and 61 percent in Wills and Succession

Therefore I have the resit to do in Jan

I would have liked to have visited Mum during Christmas but I do not wish to leave the flat alone during the Christmas period as my neighbours are envious of the car I inherited from my Father

As I hardly use the car, they had wanted to buy it for next to nothing

Even though they are now polite and well manners , they have not always been so

As for the Mirror will it should be identical to your Partners and one party should hold their will for one another

Ideally if one Partner changes their executors they should consult you as you are holding each other’s Will for one another

You will need to ask as to why he is changing executors and also is he changing the contents of his Will without your consent

As it is trust document holding for the benefit of each other , he should consult you but he can change the executors and even the contents of his will without your consent or knowledge

If he changes Executors, you will need to know why as you should both have the same executors

Secondly if he changes executors and even the contents so can you

I think you should ask him why he is changing Executors and if I were you I would check his will

As you are Cohabitee , it is essential that your Partner safeguards your interest in his Estate should he die before you

Cohabitees are not protected by Statute and there is nothing to protect you as you are not legally his Spouse

Essential for you to determine why he is changing his Executor and essential you see an up to date copy of his Will as this is the only provision in wrong which can provide for your welfare and protection in the event he dies before you

I hope you found this advice helpful but always seek Professional advice as I have given you a guideline

The tenant is recovering but I will wait in two weeks as this is when the rent is due

But the tenant is under an agreement to pay the rent as this is a contractual obligation

I hope you are keeping well

MaggieSylvie profile image
MaggieSylvie

Thanks for getting back to me Roukaya. I have a Deed of Trust that was drawn up by our solicitor when we made our mirror wills. He cannot have visited the solicitor recently; it may be that what I heard on the phone was not true as he seems to make things up as he goes along. We did decide to change the executors about three years ago but recent events in the family have made this more important to do. I still would have liked to have had a say in who was appointed as I would like to be kept in the loop about everything else that I'm being kept in the dark about. Thank you for giving my problems so much thought.

I can understand how your hormones are affecting you. I went through a really bad time with mine when, as I was only in my late thirties, I had no idea I was perimenopausal, and it affected my whole life. I didn't even have hot flushes, but I was very "off centre" emotionally. You have the advantage of expecting this to happen, so do get help from your doctor, as your reactions to events, as well as your struggles to get this final paper passed, and being on your own are bound to make you feel out of sorts. You can have a GP appointment over the phone and be safe. Good luck.

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to MaggieSylvie

Good evening

I hope you are ok

I still think you need to see a Solicitor and speak to your Partner one to determine why the change of Executor and to see the update copy of his Will

I told my Mother I am having tiredness from premenopausal symptoms she replies by saying I am causing her worry

I explained to Mum I am by myself and I actually had the choice to stay with Mum over Christmas prior to Lock Down as I sat the exams at the end of September but I knew I had scored short of the pass mark so I said I would prefer to visit in January once I sat for the resit

Can I ask if you felt tired during the premenopausal period

I hope you resolve your problems

MaggieSylvie profile image
MaggieSylvie

It was a long time ago, and I have fibromyalgia, so yes, I felt tired, but whether that was anything to do with being premenopausal or not, I don't know.

During that time, I was pregnant for 24.5 weeks and some of the time I was tired because of that, and still working, but after I lost my baby I also lost my job. I definitely think it is all - yes - all due to the menopause, although I was only 37. I was pretty much "off my trolley". No-one recognised what was going on because of my age. It was all very cruel.

I would suspect that any of your symptoms are due to menopause but recognising that means that you can treat it. Just ring your surgery. In any case, it would be good for you to talk to someone.

I'm sorry you still have to resit that exam. Getting help with your health and wellbeing should have a positive effect on that as you are likely not concentrating well at the moment either.

Ghounds profile image
GhoundsReading Rabbits

Good evening Roukaya.

The menopause can be tiring and the hormone changes can cause emotional difficulties and anxiety. Worth having a chat with your GP.

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to Ghounds

I hope you are well

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