Hi wants your opinion please. My son,bless him, worries about me. Wants to wrap me in bubble wrap to stop me getting covid. Live on my own and have IVIG treatment. Issue is my daughter is due her 3rd baby and as it will be during half term i said I would have my grandson of 6yrs and my granddaughter of 5yrs. They live in wigan England and I live near Aberdeen Scotland. My daughter's partner will drive them to Dundee and I collect from there. Then end of week I drive back down to wigan planning on staying in hotel for 2 nights. Firstly to get over the tiredness and secondly to see new baby as who knows when will see her. Have not been able to see my grandchildren for a year.
My son is convinced doing this I am going to catch covid and die.
I will be careful. No adult will come into house. Not planning on taking children anywhere. Am I putting myself in that much more danger or is my son just worrying too much.
Stoo fir long winded post but would be interested to hear what you say. Thanks
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Frodo21
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My daughter says they can still travel and this would classify as essential travel as has no one else to look after them. Not sure if full lockdown. Thanks
Hi Frodo, I would keep an eye on the news. Wigan is high alert at the moment, the same as Greater Manchester. There is talk of it going into tier 3, so this might have a bearing on your plans.
Hi Frodo21, I think your daughter is missing an important point here, in that Wigan is locked down because of a huge rise in infections. She is maybe looking on the bright side because she needs you to take care of the children, and is possibly putting her own need ahead of your safety. Saying that this is 'essential travel' is exactly what Dominic Cummings got into hot water over at the beginning of the pandemic. It's not essential travel. It is very high risk in your position, and I don't think this counts asyour son 'wrapping you in cotton wool'.
I'm sure it will be a huge disappointment if you don't have them to stay, or meet the new baby right away, but the consequence of doing this might lead to your never seeing them again.
I don't want to sound alarmist but I really don't think this is a great idea in terms of your safety. 🙏
Thank you Callendersgal. It is such a hard position to be in . My daughter has always been on the selfish side.
Hi again Frodo21, I completely understand what a delicate thing this is for you, trying not to upset anyone. But the most important thing is you and your safety. Your daughter would be devastated and heartbroken if she made you ill. Could you maybe confide in your son and ask him to work with you to gently suggest to your daughter that this is a very bad idea? I hope you can work it out without anyone becoming offended and also keep you safe. Good luck!🙏
I really feel for you. My son and his wife live around an hour so away and we were due to look after their 2yr old whilst she was having a baby at beginning of May. We thought long and hard and had to say no as both of us are at risk (although my GP is fairly certain I had Covid in March. In the end her parents agreed to go - about two hours away. They were all very sensible and it all went ok. It was torture not seeing the new baby, but at least modern technology meant lots of photos and videos. We had to wait two months in the end and just a short visit.
I have to be honest and say that I agree with your son. And you don't know how your grandchildren will react to being in a different environment. Not sure what the rules would be on having your grandchildren stay either.
My mother had four of us and my dad wasn't present at the birth which was the norm in the 1950s and my husband missed the birth of my younger son as he had a throat infection.
Thank you panda60 it is hard. She has no one else as is a very difficult person. The father of baby not father of other 2 so his first child. Problem is not good at putting my needs first, always help out. X x
Sounds like your son is on your side so maybe he will intercede on your behalf. Also see what your GP suggests - mine was adamant that neither me nor my husband should go and that she may need to go it alone. (my son was only allowed in for the last part anyway) .
Maybe this is the time to be assertive and say no. She is putting you at risk and this isn't fair on you.
Hi Frodo. I understand your predicament but for what it's worth, I agree your son, Callendersgal and Panda. You have to look after yourself, that's really important - if you're ill, who will look after you?
Thank you all so much for your opinions. I have phoned my daughter and told her cannot have the children and how hard a decision it was to make. Let's just say she was not happy.
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