Started with the best of Intentions - Positive Wellbein...

Positive Wellbeing During Self-Isolation

9,825 posts

Started with the best of Intentions

Roukaya profile image
19 Replies

My earlier posts showed I had started off the best of intentions but this evening was very stressful.

The computer was blocked and I had to call Microsoft Office and pay £90 for new anti virus software to be installed and cleaned up.

My Mother has started with an ear ache triggered by her Sinusitis.

I feel tired mentally.

The ability to reply to this post has been turned off.

19 Replies

Sorry your day didn't end as well as it started Roukaya. Did you ever hear that Jon Kabat-Zinn, quotation? "You can't stop the waves, but you can learn how to surf"? I guess that's what life's all about. Life is like an ocean. Sometimes it's calm and at other times it's stormy and tosses us around. But we can even it out if we get on our metaphorical surf boards and ride the waves instead of allowing ourselves to be tossed around and half drowned by them. But like all things, surfing needs to be learned. And takes some determination to do. You've done really well in trying to be strong and it'll be a shame if you let every wave wash over you. Hang in there. Stormy seas never last forever. Let some of your mother's problems wash over you; don't react to them. If it's something you can't do anything about from a distance, it's a waste of time feeling down about her. Redirect her to other help. There isn't much you can do about her sinusitis. You aren't close enough. She needs to follow whatever steps will give her relief. So don't let her get you down.

Being tired mentally is OK actually. We mostly all are these days. Some of us are good at hiding it, but it doesn't mean we are all OK. So please know that you are in good company. And that's where this community can be so helpful. Because as one member falls down, another can lift them up. So I feel you are in the right place when you post here.

Sleep on things and maybe tomorrow you will regain some of the positivity which you had earlier today. Take care and sleep well.

in reply to

Wise words, I love the surfing quote, I’ve never heard that before. ❤️

bobbybobb profile image

It is good you bought a Journal today as you can write all this down and how it's made you feel. These are fleeting disappointments that will pass but it's how you decide to deal with then, that will determine how long you let the disappointments carry on to affect the way you feel. Also it will come in very useful to refer back to when you are discussing any events with your therapist. Callendersgal's quote and explanation is an excellent one and is something to give much thought too. I hope when you wake in the morning your mind is lighter and more relaxed. 🌷🌼🌻

in reply to bobbybobb

Yet more wise words. ❤️

Troilus profile image

Hi Roukaya, I came across this years ago. It hit a chord with me then and it still comes to mind on occasion. It is called the Serenity Prayer. Hope you don’t mind me putting it here, but you might find it hits a chord with you too.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

Courage to change the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

It is the last line I struggle with. I am not good at accepting there are some things I can do nothing about!

Midori profile image
MidoriVisually impaired in reply to Troilus

I know a variation of this;

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

Courage to change the things I can.

And the wisdom to hide the bodies.

Cheers Midori

TheDrivenSnow profile image
TheDrivenSnow in reply to Midori


margaretpaloma profile image

Roukaya, I'm sorry for your situation and I don't want to make it worse by worrying you. But your mention of your computer being blocked and having to pay rings warning bells with me. I fear you were scammed though I can't be sure from a distance. I seriously suggest you seek help to ensure that the 'anti virus software' that you had to pay for (there is a lot of free software out there) is genuine. I write this because there are a lot of scammers about at the moment these scammers can come back if they have caught you once.

You can PM me if you wish to talk further.

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to margaretpaloma

Thank you for your concern

Firstly I paid the amount to Microsoft and I have their order and name and contact ref number

I was sent new Anti Virus Software and this was installed

I was very stressed about being scammed yesterday and I have proof of who they are

margaretpaloma profile image
margaretpaloma in reply to Roukaya

I am sorry Roukaya but I am still very sceptical. I am a retired IT director and I have never heard of Microsoft genuinely blocking someone's computer.

The software you have installed could contain malware itself.

Have a look at this

If I am suspicious about anything I always 'ask google' before proceeding.

Troilus profile image
Troilus in reply to margaretpaloma

I have had those calls too. The very first time they nearly got me. It was a phone call claiming to be from Microsoft. I was sceptical, as I didn’t think Microsoft made such calls, but they told me to check certain numbers ( can’t remember what they were ) so I was partially convinced. They then asked me to download some software so that they could access my computer to fix it. That was when I hung up.

My dad also got a call to say he had problems with his computer. He hasn’t got one, but he went along with the call, saying yep done it. You can’t see it, just hang on, I’ll do it again. Now?

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to margaretpaloma

You are very right

I have called my Bank and had my card stopped

I think they are are scam

Terrible worry for me but Bank has stopped the card

I have had my internet banking checked

Very worrying

margaretpaloma profile image
margaretpaloma in reply to Roukaya

Roukaya, glad to be of help. When you say you spoke to someone who installed the anti-virus did you do that on a standard microsoft number or a number they supplied? These people are very clever, they are doing this every day and they fool enough people to make a profit.

Could your bank also stop the payment? They can refer this to their fraud team.

Anyway, if you feel up to it what you now need to do is load a free product called malwarebytes which will scan your computer for malware. If you are feeling nervous about trusting my advice after what has happened google and see what others say.

It is possible you installed a genuine product, but probably with other things you didn't want. I would de-install it though.

Then you need good antivirus software , Bitdefender free version is good, or try Avast.

If you do internet banking then AFTER you have checked for malware change your passwords, all of them I am afraid!

I am so sorry you have had this worry, times are hard enough.

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to margaretpaloma

I hope you are safe and well

I have been up since 4am and I have not observed Ramadan yesterday nor today due to sheer stress

But thank you for your advice

Malwarbytes was installed yesterday

But they are a very well known computer company based in India and the bank card been blocked

I will have to check for malware

Also I had the added worry of the Safe Deposit Box also and by checking the various safe deposit organisations the virus sprang up to block the computer and that’s why I called them

I have the name of the person , her number and ID number and I spoke to her again this morning

But I realise the company seems to be legit but the scam of blocking the computer caused me to panic

Card blocked until I get a new one

I will have the computer checked for Malware and all of this in Ramadan

I thank you for putting me the the right track otherwise totally oblivious the the potential damage they could cause

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to margaretpaloma

I am very concerned as I paid £90 for a pop up that came up on the computer

I have rang them this morning and I was able to get in touch with the person who installed the Anti Virus Software

I have checked my accounts and they seem to be intact

in reply to Roukaya

That’s good you’ve actually spoken to someone at Microsoft, Just keep an eye on your accounts to make sure everything is ok .

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to

I hope you are well

I do not think they are Microsoft Office

I have had to cancel the bank card

I have access to a care line with Curry’s and I have had the computer reset

I will try to call the bank to see if I can recover the £90

They seem genuine enough but I have to very careful

I hope you are ok

I have had such a worrying day because of the computer which had been blocked by a virus

I will try to contact the safe deposit box firm and see if they are open

I have never known so much worry at one go

How are you keeping

TheDrivenSnow profile image

Look how capable you are, Roukaya!

You're managing a very stressful situation brilliantly, so don't underestimate yourself.

Relax this evening and don't be so hard on yourself.

Roukaya profile image
Roukaya in reply to TheDrivenSnow

Thank you

It was the same when I had to manage my Fathers Properties

I acted because it was imperative

The ability to reply to this post has been turned off.

You may also like...