Recently diagnosed and a bit scared - Positive Wellbein...

Positive Wellbeing During Self-Isolation

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Recently diagnosed and a bit scared

Farawla profile image
25 Replies

Hi, I really don’t know if I’m writing in the correct place, there seems to be many forums. My post says it all really, about to start chemo next week and still feel like it’s a bad dream, so I’m turning to here to make sense of it all. At the moment it feels like I’ve been handed a death sentence and sent home with lots of booklets to read. Trying to make senses of it all when the rest of the world just talks about covid.

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Farawla profile image
Farawla
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25 Replies
Activity2004 profile image
Activity2004

Welcome to the group. We're glad you're here.

Did your doctor say what had to be done along with the chemo? Did they give you a chance to ask about any diet changes?

If you ever want to vent/talk about anything, we are willing to listen anytime. :-)

Ghounds profile image
GhoundsReading Rabbits

I'm really sorry to hear this. Do you mind sharing your diagnosis?

Ghounds profile image
GhoundsReading Rabbits

I well remember how I felt when I found out I have cancer. It's good that you are getting prompt treatment and the hospital is probably cleaner than it has ever been. Get proper advice too about staying safe from covid as chemo will suppress your immunity. If you look at Search Communities on the main HU site you will I'm sure find one dedicated to your particular condition. Very best wishes.

Ghounds profile image
GhoundsReading Rabbits

Another thought...Macmillan and Cancer Research both have excellent websites and phone lines. At Macmillan you can speak to a nurse and they are brilliant.

Farawla profile image
Farawla in reply to Ghounds

Hi, yes I have cancer of the peritoneum/ovaries. They told me that chemo was to shrink the cancer but wouldn’t cure it.

Ghounds profile image
GhoundsReading Rabbits in reply to Farawla

There will be a group on here for ovarian cancer I'm sure. I have blood cancer, also incurable but new treatments are coming along all the time for all cancers. I don't want to offer false hope and I am not a doctor, all you can do is be guided by your consultant. Hopefully you have a good relationship with him or her. Do you have family or friends to help you?

Farawla profile image
Farawla in reply to Ghounds

Yes I have an older sister but my sons live far away

Ghounds profile image
GhoundsReading Rabbits in reply to Farawla

Bless you. I hope you can find some support. Praying your treatment will go well, let us know how you go on and you can always find a listening ear here.

Farawla profile image
Farawla in reply to Ghounds

Thank you x

S11m profile image
S11m in reply to Ghounds

Good luck with Macmillan... when my late wife was diagnosed she phoned them, and left a message - and they got back to her six weeks later!

Ghounds profile image
GhoundsReading Rabbits in reply to S11m

Oh dear, that must have been distressing. I can only speak from my own experience which has been good.

RoadRunner44 profile image
RoadRunner44

Hello and welcome to our friendly forum.

Although you mention you start chemo next week you don't actually say what it's for.

I don't want to sound intrusive but there will be many others on here, like me, who will be keen to support you during this worrying time. If you have any concerns or questions, please ask. We are all here for you.

Sending you my good wishes.

Chrys xxx

Farawla profile image
Farawla in reply to RoadRunner44

Hi, yes I have cancer of the peritoneum/ovaries. They told me that chemo was to shrink the cancer but wouldn’t cure it.

Narwhal10 profile image
Narwhal10

Dear Farawla

I’m sorry to learn of your illness and unfortunately, it can be completely overwhelming with feelings of loss, grief, shock and even anger. Please know that you are not alone, we are a supportive community. Some of us might not know or understand your particular illness but we are a pretty compassionate bunch.

With kindness x

Jennymary profile image
Jennymary

I'm not able to advise on your cancer or having chemo, I had breast cancer and didn't need chemo, but sending best wishes your way for the next few weeks

Its always frightening when you are diagnosed with a serious condition like cancer and a lot of it is to do with the unknown and uncertainty the same way I felt when I was diagnosed with blood clots in my lungs I was absolutely terrified not knowing what was going to happen but I am fine now.

Best of luck with your chemo!

Hi Farawla,

A warm welcome to you and you certainly aren't in the wrong place. But on the other hand, there are other groups on HealthUnlocked which might be able to give you more specialised help, especially after you start your chemo. But you can check those out one by one and meantime do feel comfortable here. I do understand that you must be really scared at the moment. It's a lot to take in. The world seems to close in on you when you have a serious diagnosis and you're right; the world is momentarily obsessed with Covid-19, when I'm sure that's the last thing you care to hear about.

Do you have other people around you who can support you? That's very important if you can, as talking things over and knowing you have the love of family and friends can help with your anxiety level.

Read those booklets carefully. If you know your enemy you can defeat him more easily. It may not be an easy read, but you do need to know what you are likely to be up against. And always ask about anything you don't understand.

Support is available from McMillan nurses who can help with almost any aspect of your treatment, emotional support and even financial, if needed. If you haven't already, please ask to be put in touch when you attend hospital for your chemo.

If you are a person of faith, or feel that now you need faith in your life, think about contacting someone locally who can help you spiritually. The hospital will also have chaplains and respresentatives of other faiths, and even during this crisis will, I'm sure at least be able to contact you by telephone.

I hope this is a start for you. You are very welcome to post here as often as you wish. We'll alway try to make sure you get an answer to any question you have and are happy to just chat things through, as you need. Take care and try not to worry too much. Many people come through their cancer journey every single day, so try to remain hopeful. Very best wishes and thinking of you.

Iside profile image
Iside

Don’t read too much, it’s confusing and frightening. Just be thankful you have been diagnosed and are starting treatment. I too was frightened but reasoned with myself, what are the alternatives, more frightening, soo accept it will be stressful but you will have been appointed a CNurse specialist who will help you. If you have support at home to accompany you on the journey, great if not there will be others who will come forward. Take it a stage at a time & don’t let your mind shoot forward, slowly slowly you’ll come through. We’ve all been there and are still here battling on courage my friend you’ll find it, Big hugs X

Farawla profile image
Farawla in reply to Iside

Thank you, yes I learn the lesson about reading too much the hard way, didn’t need the anxiety x

Iside profile image
Iside in reply to Farawla

Lovely to hear from you. When are you starting your chemo & are you, like me having chemo 1st then op., followed by chemo? Others have Op followed by chemo!!! I found after coming thru all the treatment I was then ready to take on board further info., re OC. Slowly slowly have reg.,with Ovacome & others & find it helpful but don’t read it all the time. Am taking it a week at a time & finding I can have a life, albeit restricted, but find I forget I have this problem most of the time!!! Big hugs X

Farawla profile image
Farawla

Hi Iside, I am having 2 courses of chemo but no decision about an op after, I suppose it depends on the outcome from the chemo, as you say just trying to take it one day at a time and not trying to read too much in the way it’s being treated. I don’t know what alternatives there are after chemo but maybe if I stick around on this site I will educate myself. I also try and find things to distract me because I find it Makes me feel worse if I dwell on it. I’d like to stay in touch x

TheDrivenSnow profile image
TheDrivenSnow

Hello.

I've only just seen your post and just want to reassure you that - no matter what your diagnosis or prognosis - you will find a lot of support and compassion on this forum (as I have).

Like you, I was so tentative and unsure (and honestly a bit numb) when I was first diagnosed with (breast) cancer back in 2016. This is my third diagnosis, and the hardest, as the cancer has now spread and can't be cured. But as I haven't been given any timelines (and, frankly, I'm not sure I would cope if I were to be told), I'm continuing to do my thing (whatever that thing is - haven't quite figured it out yet!)

This stupid virus has added an additional layer of complexity that we could have done without, but it's here now, so we've just got to get our heads around it all and keep going, I suppose.

What I will say is that I've not done reams and reams of reading around my condition. I do like to inform myself, of course, but I keep it within limits and confine most of my search for information to consultations with my oncologist and my hospice consultant (and, very occasionally, my GP). It is easy to work yourself up into a tizzy and allow the fear to overwhelm you, so please allow as much normality as possible (given the circumstances) to remain in your life as you navigate this new normal.

A good support system helps, too, and I very much hope you have one: don't be afraid to ask for help, lean heavily if you need or want to - and try to look at this new normal as the next phase of your life, not as a disaster. Because it doesn't have to be one.

If you have a specific question, please don't hesitate (at all) to throw it out there: you will be heard and helped.

xx

Farawla profile image
Farawla in reply to TheDrivenSnow

Thank you Drivensnow for your honesty and support. Sending you love, Judex

TheDrivenSnow profile image
TheDrivenSnow in reply to Farawla

💛

First let me say that I am sorry you are going through this. Second, a cancer diagnosis is not a death sentence. Many people live long happy lives with cancer. I have had lung cancer twice, I am still here. There are many online support groups for cancer patients.

Maybe look and see if there are any in person support groups in your area? Your oncologist or cancer care center might know of a group you can join if you want to.

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