I have always considered myself upbeat and easy going kinda girl...even through 42 years of marriage and raising three children...but lately I seem very angry all of the time. I was diagnosed with PD in December 2005 at the age of 55 and all considered I do believe that I have handled it well...until now. My husband is my "Go To Person" we spend most of our time together though he does still work outside of the home 30~35 hours a week...and I can go for weeks at a time not seeing anyone else. We live in a rural area but too I have come to feel that people, including our children, don't want to see me in the state that I'm in...not able to do so many of the things that I use to do. That upsets me, but I am not angry..I do understand.
The anger that I speak of is with my husband...he seems to have found that "last nerve" of mine to get onto and things don't seem to be getting any better. I feel bad after I have gotten upset with him and he says that he understands. I do alot of self talk trying to not get upset, but it's not working very well. The real issue is that I get so frustrated when the hubby does for me without my asking...he has a good heart but he has taken on knowing what I want & need...his deciding what is best for me...now that he does most of the cooking he has my kitchen upside down & backwards...the laundry is a mess...but I can't say anything...if I do the big storm rols in and we both get upset.he knows how I feel <when I am at the dr. the hubby will conterdict what I am telling my dr.> decides when I go out and where...if he had his way he would rather I be sitting in the same spot when he gets home as I was when he left the house! I have lost all control of my own life and this is so not where I want to be!
People keep telling me how lucky I am to have such a wonderful man who cares so much for me and I do love and appreciate him...but I feel we are in this parent/child relationship and yes it has me feeling horrid. I don't know how to deal with the anger...I have tried saying nothing when something is bothering me...but that is not me...in the past he & I could always talk. Ha anyone else gone through this?????? Any helpful advice would be so appreciated.....Casey in NH