As Ive read thats what you call it,when a symptom is a sudden, striking thought that something bad happened at a specified time and place. So today I was talking to my niece and a friend was there with us. I told my niece to stop bothering the company, atleast that’s what I thought I said because for some reason I started thinking , oh my god, did I say something else? Like something really offensive? Then the thought replayed of the things I might have said and I just got this panicky-nauseated feeling because I’m just so tired of second guessing every single thing I say..I know I should see a therapist but can’t afford it as of now...it’s like a pattern every day, there’s a thought to obsess over like what if I really did say such and such...I’m just not use to this, it’s not like I’ve always had this problem usually it’s just stress but now it’s just a constant worry that I may have said something offensive or just say an intrusive thought nearly everydayyyy!! It’s made me an emotional mess. More so because I’m so use to being sharp thinker , being able to multitask efficiently and hold a conversation. As of lately, I can’t seem to do that anymore. It’s like I have a brain fog , can’t focus like I use to and a constant fear that I will say an unwanted thought..I’m just not sure what’s going on or even what to do anymore , except cry
False memory ocd: As Ive read thats what you... - OCD Support
OCD Support
False memory ocd
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A lot of people have done that, OCD or not! Thinking that what you said doesn't match what you thought you said. But having OCD makes you obsess about it, whereas most people shrug it off and move on. And OCD makes you more likely to experience this, once it gets into your head that you may have said something you didn't want to say.
I'm assuming that you live in a country where you have to pay for medicine. It makes it very difficult for a lot of people, who just don't have the money. Here in England we have the National Health Service which is free for everyone, though it is underfunded and there are often waiting lists for therapy.
But if you can't afford a therapist, there are lots of things you can do. There are resources online, but make sure you use reputable sites. There are self help books as well.
But just think for a moment. Do people really say what they don't mean to say that often? Do people just come out with offensive statements accidentally? Not often, and when they do it is usually because they phrase things badly or are insensitive. They don't just mean to say one things and come out with another.
So try to acknowledge the thought, put it to one side, and move on. Don't play it over constantly in your head, because the more you do, the more you doubt, and the truth is that it is most unlikely you said something you didn't mean to say.
Sallyskins, everytime I get a reply from you I feel 1000 times better! For you to take time out of your day and give GREAT advice is much appreciated!!!! Your advice actually calms me down and acknowledge the things that are going on and just be more reasonable. Also I see that you help a lot of people on this forum! I cannot thank you enough ❤️
Thanks for saying so! I too struggle with OCD so I know what it's like.
It’s horrible. I’m putting to use of what you said about saying something offensive accidentally as least likely to happen. I can convince myself that it’s just my mind playing tricks on me, so it works for a while but then there are moments where I’m zoned out or not really paying attention of what I actually say and then it starts up again where I go , why wasn’t I focusing on what I was saying ??!!!!!so I’d know exactly what I had said to begin with. Also there are times when I will be ‘lost in thought’ so id immediately think that I’ve said something Even though I don’t think I did.which causes my mini panic of “what if’s”and it’s just so draining all the time, well most of the day. It’s like my brain is in a loop where it only knows the same three intrusive thoughts and nothing else! It’s like in the past 2 months or so , I haven’t felt anything but overwhelmed because of this. My siblings have been dealing with anxiety and depression , one of them even expressed that she has had intrusive thoughts but hers went away and she hasn’t had them since. My other sibling has said she can’t concentrate, she has memory gaps and is irritated way too easily. Although they have problems, I feel mine seem to be the worst because of the intrusive thoughts and rumination..it’s hard to talk to them about it because they’ll be like ,”I don’t understand what you mean, are you saying you overthink?because you’ve always kind of been that way”..so that’s why I come on here to get a better understanding. I’m not sure what brought this on . I’m not sure if being depressed for long period of time contributed to it or if this is a symptom from being depressed itself? I come from a struggling , large family. We’ve always been poor.things would always go downhill for us which contributed to my depression in recent years.the last year or so has been pretty rough but I hadn’t noticed changes in my depression or anxiety even when things got really bad, I was ok, no symptoms like the ones I’m experiencing now...it wasn’t until around late November of 2019 that i noticed an intrusive thought but it would last for about a day and then everything would go back to normal. Now the intrusive thoughts don’t leave ...
There is so much that we do automatically, without giving much thought to it. There are little tricks you can use to make sure you know what you have done, for example, I take my medication with my first cup of coffee in the morning. I know I've had my meds, because it coincides with that kick of caffeine!
Talking is something we also do automatically without giving much thought to what words we pick. Occasionally it's necessary to give a bit of thought to what we are going to say, for example if we are making a speech. But it's just impossible to treat everyday conversation like a set speech! There's just too much effort involved.
But think about it. Do people really come out with gratuitous insults in normal conversation? No, they don't! And neither, I'm sure, do you!
Intrusive thoughts are part of OCD. And the more you push them away, they more they thrive. It's as though they like the attention. The less attention you give them, the better, as they get fed up with being ignored and go away of their own accord.
Nobody really knows why some of us get OCD. But the problems of being poor can lead to physical and mental ill health. More equal societies, where everyone has a similar standard of living, have on the whole much better mental as well as physical health. So it's not surprising that you and other members of your family have struggled with their mental health.
Try not to ruminated. Ruminating on what you might possible have done just fuels the doubt and before you know it you're certain you've done something that, in reality, you haven't!
It is, as you say, as though your mind is in a loop. The same thought goes round and round. The best way to break the loop is to let it alone, acknowledge that the intrusive thought is there, then ignore it as best you can. Don't push it away. It's a difficult skill to learn and one I still struggle with. But it can help to take five or ten minutes out, do something else, and let your brain calm down.
Thankyou again for this. I’ve gotten so paranoid that I may be saying something “bad” that I don’t usually have long conversations in fear that I’ll just let something wrong out(I know ridiculous right?)but this week I’ve been having longer conversations with my family and friends . I mean I still find myself thinking that I’ve slipped and said something but then I just stop and think , ok would I really say something like that?i have never done it before, so I’m sure I didn’t do it then...Then I’ll push it to the side and do whatever I was doing..I’m just trying to get comfortable with conversations without feeling guilty afterwards or over analyzing every single thing I say or think I’ve said.. I’m just hoping that I can adapt and regain some kind of confidence again.
It sounds as though you're doing really well. Keep it up!
I’m trying really hard. I was fine a couple days ago but then today got pretty bad. I was exposed to a situation that triggered me(I’m too embarrassed to say) and I just kept thinking to myself, what If I did do something really bad ? There were people in the room with me , so surely If I did anything , someone would have said something ..I didn’t ask anyone for reassurance. I was just so nauseous, disgusted and hurt by my immediate intrusive thoughts and memories making me think I could have done something wrong. Like I’m constantly crying or upset because it’s hard to become someone I can’t recognize anymore. Not being sure is quite debilitating because a couple months ago I did everything effortless now I question everything and don’t think I’ll ever go back to my usual self ever again..the constant doubt and worry is the worst ever
The real you is still in there! And remember that OCD fluctuates a lot. Some days you can be perfectly all right, or nearly so, other days you can struggle. The thing in this case is not to ruminate. In not asking for reassurance you did the right thing.
Let it rest for a bit. Think of the self disgust and panic as a sort of wave that builds and swells, but then breaks on the shore. Or clouds overhead that disperse. Or leaves carried away on a stream. That's a technique I learnt in therapy and I've found it useful.
Try to keep busy. Let the feelings subside, as they do. Don't go over it in your head, or ask questions of yourself. Therapy isn't easy, but you have done the right thing.
Yes some days are better for me. My problem is that I Do question everything I say or do and I know that I shouldn’t . For instance , if I’m woken out of my sleep and asked a question, I’ll instantly feel like I’ve said an intrusive thought instead of replying to the question.Usually I’m not worried about this because I tell myself that I specifically answered the question , not said some random impulsive thing, then my thinking will be like well you did just wake up so you could have said it. I’m just taking it one day at a time and trying to not overthink or worry too much
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