Being a mum of an ocd child: Hi. Just wondered... - OCD Support

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Being a mum of an ocd child

TKOK profile image
TKOK
14 Replies

Hi. Just wondered if there were any support groups in Kent for mums with smaller children struggling with OCD. I have an 8 year old daughter who has severe ocd and is currently having cbt. But I know it is going to be a long hard battle for her to get any better. It would be good to speak to other mums and get support and advice.

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TKOK
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Sallyskins profile image
Sallyskins

I can't suggest any group to you in Kent, not living there. But do make sure you are in touch with your daughter's school and that they understand something of what she is experiencing. There is still a lot of ignorance around OCD and support from an understanding school and sympathetic staff is going to be important. They need to be assured that she is not simply playing up or being difficult, and to make allowances for her.

Perhaps the therapy team who are treating her could put you in touch with a local group, or maybe you could even start one up yourself! For all the misunderstanding around OCD it is a relatively common condition and I'm sure there are other parents and children out there with similar problems who could help you and you them.

TKOK profile image
TKOK in reply to Sallyskins

Hi Sally. Thankfully her school are now very good but it has taken quite a few years to make them believe me that she has ocd. As she hids her rituals and obsessions at school and then releases them at home. She is really doing well at the moment and we have now been offered EMDR to help with the (accident) trauma she had when 4 and we think triggered the ocd. I do go to an ocd group in Kent every month but this is for adult sufferers. Sadly not having a lot of time I don't think I would manage to set up a group but yes it is really needed. Thank you for emailing me it is a great help to hear from other people and not feel that we are alone.

Sallyskins profile image
Sallyskins in reply to TKOK

That's good, the school being helpful. OCD is such a secretive condition and most of us have many ways of hiding it, and it doesn't surprise me that your daughter tries to keep it quiet at school! It can be quite exhausting. It's good to hear that she is getting help with her trauma. CAMHS is so overstretched and underfunded but early intervention can save a lot of heartache and misery.

Sarahav profile image
Sarahav

Hi tkok, I'm not in Kent, but in Essex and I too have a 9 year old suffering with OCD. He's recieving CBT but isn't making progress and it's very had for us all. I haven't been able to find support groups for children here either, but I'm contacting snap to see if they can help as they were recommended to me. If I get any joy I'll be sure to let you know!

TKOK profile image
TKOK in reply to Sarahav

Thank you that's really helpful. I was told by one therapist that they avoid getting the actual children to meet as they feel that some children give others ideas as to doing certain rituals. But i did say it would be just nice to chat with other mums. How long has your son suffered? how are you all coping? Its not easy is it. Do you have other children. I think my daughter was born with ocd but it only really came out dramatically when she had an accident aged 4. Its been an onward battle to get her help. Does your son understand his condition. Does he struggle to talk about it or is he fairly open with his friends? Sorry so many questions but I have not yet come across another mum with a child the same age as mine with the condition so its great to hear from you.

Sarahav profile image
Sarahav in reply to TKOK

I totally get your questions! He was diagnosed in august this year, and showed weird signs of it since beginning of the this year, so it kind of came on really quickly with no trigger they can find. Ive another son of 6. It's like living in a minefield! I can see why the therapist might say that about children meeting....certain words can trigger a meltdown with my son, so can see how that wouldn't help! He does understand his disorder to a certain extent, but doesn't want to talk about it at all and gets very upset and frustrated when we suggest delaying, or changing a compulsion. He says it's too hard to do and would rather ignore facing it. Very frustrating for us, watching him do his compulsions every minute. Our therapist is private at the moment because the mental health team have said it would be 6 months till he's offered CBT on the NHS. But he's not engaging with it at all really.

Sarahav profile image
Sarahav in reply to Sarahav

Also, he's on a part time timetable in his school as his anxiety is so high he cannot cope full time. Nightmare, and he's really academically doing well. But not anymore!

TKOK profile image
TKOK in reply to Sarahav

Oh bless you. it sounds like you are having a really difficult time. If you want to speak more on the phone I might be able to give you some advice which may help you speed up the process with CAMHS, not sure how as dont want to put my phone number on this site as not sure who can see it? ..do you have facebook?

Sarahav profile image
Sarahav in reply to TKOK

Yes I'm on Facebook, Sarah Verrier. Could message you in private from that?

TKOK profile image
TKOK in reply to Sarahav

Think I just sent you a facebook message.. did you get it? sorry I am rubbish at facebook.

teldee profile image
teldee in reply to TKOK

Hi TKOK I'm interested to hear how you suggest one can speed up the CAHMS process to get CBT.

My grandaughter is 15 and really needs more help with her ocd. CAHMS have put her in Family Therapy, which won't help much and takes forever. They also referred her to a psychiatrist who has put her on the adult dose of seratonin to help with her sleep problems, but that's only short term too.

She lives in Hertfordshire but I imagine the wait for CBT is still long there too.

Could you give me any tips about how to speed things up by Private Messaging me on this forum please ?

Dani500 profile image
Dani500

Have you tried inositol powder helps my son

Bunchy180 profile image
Bunchy180 in reply to Dani500

Hi I have tried inositol for my daughter when she was at her worse not talking to us, meltdown if my hair touched my nose or someone in the house coughed- only sitting in one place , not touching anything or anyone. We were under CAMHs for cbt but Nothing g helped her anxiety and melt down/ panic attacks, I tried 12 grams of inositol first in powder form then capsules and this dramatically reduced the anxiety, the CAMHs introduced Sertraline which they increased at 25mg every4 weeks, she is now on 100 mg but she has kept taking a reduced amount on inositol and I am sure this has helped also with reduction. In side effects from meds . It’s says there is no benefit from taking together but there is no interaction- I checked with my dr( although the CAMHs de said she hasn’t heard of it and said to stop) I just feel this was the first thing to help her and the only side effects she had was going to the loo a it more than often!!

It is worth a try and is safe for children too

Wallbanger2 profile image
Wallbanger2

Hi thereSo sorry to hear your in the same boat as myself. My child has Germaphobic ocd towards people. It’s a huge day by day battle for us parents. Watching our loved ones suffering almost helpless themselves. If only we could take their torment away for them. But life has many challenges and we were meant to have these ocd children. Cos we are the best parent they could hv wished for. So here your journey begins by your daughters side. And through every battles she takes against her ocd. My sons CBT treatment hempseed massively. With his ocd towards his sister being full of germs. But it transferred onto his school being full of germs! But that’s much more manageable than towards his sister. Take long deep breathes and talk about how she feels and what triggers hers. But also you MUST take time for YOU. To find something that gives your mind a “switch off”. The better you can find a peaceful mind space. The better you will be to help your daughters battles. There’s a great book called “ don’t sweat the small stuff. Also remember to BE KIND TO YOURSELF XX

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