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Hi all. Well had a strange few day s,

My right hand really hurting so excuse spelling .lol neck hurting and right leg hip and my lower back, thing is I over did it the other day but not by choice . I felt quite good concidering and friend said about eve out . Now she knows I drive between even short distance places or will be in pain and leg swell and be unable to enjoy myself, but she decided that i caould wlk from one place to another , ok thought not far but go slow, she grabs my arm and marches off ,part way had to stop with burning in my back and my foot on fire , but ok rest when get there i thought , come one she said you need excersise .Now this is a friend i thought understood my health ,my limits and why i do some things and not others . But she just wanted to get to this place for her own reasons that she did not tell me about . Felt so annyed when got there cos she had planned to meet her ex, which is fine if you want to watch a constant verbal battle , which i dont and didnt ,which she so why did not tell me so I left and had to walk back to my car , not but far but far enough on my own and the pain started again and my breathlessness, so stopped for a couple of min then just wanted to get home . Next day i was in pain and what was not pain was on fire ,aching and whole body felt like lead and constant pain . Why is it people forget what they know about you when a man is in the "room". ...Today going to drive to town and then go to he little market .plenty of seats and will enjoy the sunshine. on my own as i can do what i want when i want lol, I dont have many friends because of my health ,and hurts when one i do have just forgets, ...... ok off my chest lo lgo oft i jolly well go .take care all xx

3 Replies

Oh pam,i feel for you. I don't have many friends round here where i live. All my friends are on here or f/book She was rather insensitive wasn't she,i hope that the next time she tries that trick you tell her where to go.

Take care


Hello pam,

this is the second time i am responding to you - my first reply just disappeared into the ether. This keeps happening to me, i must forget to submit comment. Anyway, just wanted to say that your friend was determined to get your support whether you wished to go and or not. I think she was quite single minded and didn't take your problems into account at all. Sometimes people do not want to make allowances for you or they decide what your limitations are regardless of what you say.

Hope you feel better today and just be aware of her next time round.


Have you got the Spoon Theory memorised yet? If not look it up on google and memorise it to tell stupid, selfish friends when necessary. Mind you I told a so-called friend the spoon theory a while ago after his bullying had caused a severe flare up in my wrists and fingers. He hasn't spoken to me since but my OH and I have decided that this is just because he uses people for his own purposes and now realises that it isn't a good idea doing this to me! I'm quite careful with my friends as don't want to alienate them by talking about RA too much but I know the people who understand (at least up to a point) and I know those who don't know what RA is or means and I avoid the latter now.

Hope you feel much better soon Pam.

Tilda xx


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