I know this might initially sound strange but please bear with me.
After much time living with uncontrolled RA, in between 'flares', I still had symptoms of active RA. However, I'm finally settled with an anti TNF and 2 DMARDs. In between flares, I still live with chronic pain due to my joint erosions/damage but it's something I have come to accept.
When RA was in my life 24:7, it was horrendous but at least I knew what to expect. I live in constant fear of the unknown, waiting for the next flare to hit. In between flares, I forget what it's like to live, work and socialise with RA but it comes barreling back full force once every 3/4 weeks. I've accepted that even with all these medications, I will always live with RA to some degree. It's just so hard when I try to manage my life with my current level of disability and suddenly, I'm very unwell again and even less able.
Can anyone else relate to this?