3 months clean today - used desmoxan - No Smoking Day

No Smoking Day

5,213 members32,485 posts

3 months clean today - used desmoxan

youghal profile image
youghal1 Year Smoke Free
32 Replies

Hi everyone

i have been wanting to post my story for some time but I suppose I didn't feel confident that I could carry on doing this.

I have smoked for about 40 years on and off, since I was a teenager. I stopped for bfief period of time, usually around 3 months and and then gradually going back on 2-3 a day but by about 9-10 months would be fully smoking again. I have tried patches, gum and zyban. In the end I almost resigned myself to being a life time smoker, albeit reluctantly.

I suppose I got a big wake up call just over a year when my older brother (63) suffered a severe stroke and is now in long term nursing home care in Ireland. I bought desmoxan on line, they help in reducing cravings for the first few weeks. Took them for 5 days, then had to stop smoking and carry out with the tablets for 3 weeks after on a decreasing dose.

The first few weeks were pretty good , my mood was good and on the whole the process was very painless. I did have some minor problems- sore lips and gums, tingling in my hands and feet, constantly clearing my throat. In November I developed other unrelated health problems which are still being investigated.

I wish I could say I was feeling fantastically healthier and better but I am not in that place yet. I still have no energy and often feel anxious, panicky and a bit depressed. Christmas was stressful, I was hosting Christmas and was under a fair bit of pressure. This week my car broke down and is still in the garage , nothing wrong I'm pleased to say, however because a red wearing light come on to erroneously say my engine is overheating, it will cost me in excess of £250!!! Great timing, post Christmas. I always find January gloomy.

Friends and work colleagues say that I look better and my skin looks younger and brighter. On a more positive note , despite feeling rubbish and my anxiety levels going through the roof , particularly during these mini crises, I have not succumbed. At times I feel so frustrated and ill at ease in my own skin I want to scream.

I have been a complete slob all my life , never exercised regularly - a complete couch potato, but am reasonably tall at 5' 9. Luckily I have always been slim, so far I have not gained any weight. My daughter gave me some sessions with a personal trainer as a Christmas present, and I am becoming familiar with the inside of gym for the first time in my life, having now had two sessions.

I am doing this by trying to get through one day at a time, drinking cold water helps and some days are less bothersome than others. I read the posts on here practically every day and get a lot of hope reading about your stories and hearing your struggles. I apologise for not being more supportive and vocal , but I think because I have been feeling so wretched I didn't believe I could be of any help to anyone else.

I find it fascinating to read how nicotine has altered our brains by infiltrating it really and still tries to trick it into using again. I am hoping and praying that the nicotine receptors are weakening and dying off on a daily basis.

So we all have to stay strong together and keep doing what we are doing , repeating the mantra NOPE. When I think about it properly we are all doing brilliantly and whilst all our stories are unique we have a common bond.

If you are still reading this, I thank you for your time. If you got bored and given up , no worries.

God bless.

Written by
youghal profile image
youghal
1 Year Smoke Free
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
Read more about...
32 Replies
RoisinO1 profile image
RoisinO1Administrator3 Years Smoke Free

What a great post Youghal, inspiring, encouraging and motivational. Congratulations on 3 months, imagine how far you will have come at 6 months 😲l have a great feeling this is your journey permanently as an ex smoker.

Are you Irish by the way, was meant to ask you when you first joined was your name after the town Youghal in Co. Cork?

youghal profile image
youghal1 Year Smoke Free in reply to RoisinO1

Thanks Roisin. I am undeed Irish , and Youghal is my nearest town, come from a little village nearby. I live in London but go back fairly regularly. What part are you from yourself?

I agree with you that this may be my final quit, this may sound daft but it has a different feel to it than previous times. That's not to say I am feeling complacent as I know that I am only a whisker away from reverting to being a smoker again.

We all test ourselves every day by resisting those triggers that our bodies react to by instinctively telling us we need a ciggie. I can't say I get through them In a very controlled rational or elegant way, but I will get better at it when I eventually find some healthier ways of managing life's challenges 2018 is going to be a year of exploration and discovery for me

Nicotine is sooo addictive , which is why we are all winners on here.

RoisinO1 profile image
RoisinO1Administrator3 Years Smoke Free in reply to youghal

Lucky you, if I was ever going to move it would be to Cobh or Kinsale in Cork, love everything about them and have went down there many a summers... I am in the midlands in a small town just on the Co, Fermanagh border.

That is put perfectly only being a whisker a way from smoking again, even for myself at over 2 years, our guard must be up at all times but is a small price to pay for being smoke free, healthy and enjoying life :)

Keep in touch when you can....

Exsmo profile image
Exsmo in reply to youghal

Youghal, your way with words is brilliant! I got a chuckle in familiarity of, " I can't say I get through them in a very controlled rational or elegant way...but..will ...when find healthier ways...". You are not alone in this and I appreciate your saying it just so.

Roison O1 for the love of the Irish i met a man here in Kentucky, working with horses, from Cork! The way he spoke of the beauty of it almost made us born Americans (part Irish) homesick for it too! I hope one day to see your beautiful green country.

Tracey3 profile image
Tracey31 Year Smoke Free

Hello from me to you, and me I say I get a lot from your posts also, just think, how fantastic you are, quitting is a commitment, and you do indeed sound committed. It’s great to have you one board, our minds are wonderful things, of course quitting, enhances every difficult situation, but your in the right place, so any real difficulties just post SOS, wait for 3 reply’s, and the think again, addiction is only addiction if you lets it be, and your proving, your not having any of that.

Well done, keep posting

Doing fantastic

youghal profile image
youghal1 Year Smoke Free

Thank so much Tracey3.

I do appreciate the support, am really trying to stay positive ( most of the time )

We will stay strong together. Just getting through anothe day.

Atta1 profile image
Atta13 Months Smoke FreeValued Contributor

3 months is amazing, 1/4 of a year :)

This board helps a lot so stick around, read and post as much as you need x

youghal profile image
youghal1 Year Smoke Free

Thanks Atta ,will do !

SheenaL profile image
SheenaLValued Contributor

Youghal,

Congrats on the 3 months and for sharing your story. Keep up the great work. I found that exercise was so very helpful to reducing cravings, feeling better, and helping meeting new people who are also non-smokers. You got this!

youghal profile image
youghal1 Year Smoke Free

Thanks Sheena . I am hoping to increase my exercise , hence starting at the gym,

I will keep you posted.

Exsmo profile image
Exsmo in reply to youghal

I have no clue what they do at the gym, but am feeling inspired by all this talk of it to go find out after hitting and getting to other side of icky3 craves.

Chinnup profile image
Chinnup1 Year Smoke Free

Hi Youghal, your post helped me a lot, I am in the midst of sorting out some health problems too and waiting to see a specialist later in Jan is making my quit even more anxious sometimes, thanks for sharing your story and all the best. Stay quit !! :)

youghal profile image
youghal1 Year Smoke Free in reply to Chinnup

Thanks and good look with your health appointment , hope it's nothing to be too concerned about and your anxiety is relieved. Just keep telling yourself that any worries you have will not be resolved by smoking or made any better.

Just stay stopped for 1 more day( that's what I tell myself when I am struggling)

Thanks for support

Chinnup profile image
Chinnup1 Year Smoke Free in reply to youghal

Yes, I tell myself I have one less problem already, and keep as busy as possible, we'll get there - by time of my appointment I'll be nearly 2 months smokefree :)

Exsmo profile image
Exsmo in reply to Chinnup

Hey Chinnup, am in same boat w health. May i recommend not looking too far ahead? Just taking care of todays health and your quit today is enough. If i look ahead and worry over upcoming appt i may sabotage my quit while doing nothing to improve appointment. Just want to encourage you so you won't be overwhelmed and easier prey for the Nicodemon or nasty nic...whichever name you prefer. ( i try to think of bad names for it when feeling nostalgic missing having silly brain twists) This time together i think we can ALL quit this forever!

Chinnup profile image
Chinnup1 Year Smoke Free in reply to Exsmo

Thanks Exsmo, wise words again :) I am taking day by day and dealing with whatever comes as it comes - often it's anxiety but sometimes it's not which is a bonus. Someone advised me that whatever comes, adding smoking to it is adding a problem and no solution and they were so right. We'll get through this one way or another without smoking, all the best to you with your health.

Exsmo profile image
Exsmo in reply to Chinnup

O i like that "smoking only adds another problems". I too have anxiety and strange enough i used a drinking straw to pretend smoke when i just HAD to have one. Later read smoking IS a form of deep breathing exercise. I figured i was getting a deep breathing exercise while "smoking" air (from the straw cut to cig size.) This helped me get over firsts. Long drive i smoked a clear straw & seriously helped with hand to mouth habit. Of course it gave me nothing but air but was somehow comforting and got me through first month and now i may use it for the out of the blue craves.

The longer you go without smoking, the calmer and less anxious you get. I only take 1/3 of my anxiety meds... If i take them at all. They are as needed & i find i just don't need them as much! Its amazing. I read as smokers we are in a constant state of withdrawl other than when we are actually smoking. It might be on whyquit.com. Or a pinned post here. Very enlightening & another incentive to protect that quit. I have battled thag anxiety for over 20 years. Wouldnt it be awesome to be cured of it finding out smoking was a trigger for that!.

All the best to you with your health as well! Thanks for that kindness what will be will be and I honestly don't worry. It's rather ironic.

Chinnup profile image
Chinnup1 Year Smoke Free in reply to Exsmo

Fingers/toes crossed that it is over time :)

in reply to Exsmo

I strongly believe smoking increases anxiety ..and the soothing dope I felt when lighted up a cig was just a temporary fix and like a circle process I got more nervous and anxiy latter on

CocoaXChange profile image
CocoaXChangeValued Contributor

Great going Youghal. Unfortunately sometimes it takes a health scare with ourselves or family to give us the commitment to quit.

youghal profile image
youghal1 Year Smoke Free in reply to CocoaXChange

Yes indeed, my brother was ( and is still ) a smoker, his life has changed irrevocably.

It's easy to pretend you are invincible, but it's really just gambling.

You have been quit for some time? Thanks for making contact

CocoaXChange profile image
CocoaXChangeValued Contributor in reply to youghal

2+ years for me. When we are young the future seems far away and we can be reckless. We grow out of some of that behavior, but the addiction of cigs makes that one of the hardest things to leave behind.

Good week to all.

Exsmo profile image
Exsmo

Am @ 3 mos with you. Big well done and agree "NOPE" may get us through. That repairing process is something else! Maybe that process really shows us the true meaning of addiction. Funny but even tho I smoked 35 years and knew i was addicted, i really didn't understand what addiction meant or know how strong it was until I quit. Great post.

youghal profile image
youghal1 Year Smoke Free in reply to Exsmo

Well done to you too!! We are heroes! I won't if you don't, ha ha

Exsmo profile image
Exsmo in reply to youghal

That's the best thing about quitting buddies! Sounds good to me.

Chinnup profile image
Chinnup1 Year Smoke Free in reply to Exsmo

Wise words Exsmo :)

RoisinO1 profile image
RoisinO1Administrator3 Years Smoke Free

100 days smoke free today youghal :)

RoisinO1 profile image
RoisinO1Administrator3 Years Smoke Free in reply to RoisinO1

6 months today youghal - hope you are keeping well?

Rose61 profile image
Rose61

Hi I did a trial and it worked, but it’s a month since I finished the desmoxan. Can u pl tell me where online you bought. They are not available in Australia and I want to make sure I don’t buy fake tablets

jobm1 profile image
jobm11 Year Smoke Free

What an amazing post!

Nowandforever profile image
Nowandforever

Thanks yougal...

Even when it’s hard you keep going. Your amazing... your post is so encouraging and shows how strong determination can overcome the hardest moments.

Thank you so much for sharing your story,

THRIVE532 profile image
THRIVE532

Just ordered desmoxan for myself & hubby...praying for it helping us to quit. Loved reading your story - so honest and inspiring! Thank you for hope and encouragement....we're in the US so won't get until July 10th but will let you know how goes. Thanks again ~ brightest blessings 🙏🙏🙏💜

You may also like...

3 calender months today!

thought but there have been some tough days when i could have easily turned back to smoking. I know...

3 full calendar months today

from me that it gets better all the time. I can honestly say that I feel one billion percent better...

Into the 3 month room today!!!

very comfy. I have been quit for 2 Months (60 days). I have saved £315.97 by not smoking 1,200...

Into month 3 Today!

irritation to the day. :( If you are reading this and are a new starter, don't worry about these...

3 months nicotine free today!

fag. Needless to say I didn’t have one, the urge came and went. Most of the time now though when...