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[nsd_user663_50109]

I really really want a smoke rite now.. Iv bin like this just over a week now it's getting bad arggggg.. Make matter worse my fella just bin shop and got him self 10 (he only smokes when he had a drink). And he dont give a shit weather I smoke or not

[nsd_user663_20558]

I bet you he does. I bet you he's just waiting for you to crack so he can feel better about himself. DON'T LET THAT HAPPEN!!!!

You've been through days like this and come out smiling. Your anxiety is getting better. Your sleeping is better. You are getting through this, bit by bit, and it would just be so crap just as you're reaching the sunshine to go right back to square one?

Stay strong Shelley. You can do this. Hold your head up and stay tough!

Hel x

[Unah]

DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You didn't go through all that to give in when you are getting to the end of all the bad stuff. We're here to help. If he cared for you he would respect what you are doing and not smoke when he is with you. x

[nsd_user663_50109]

Thanks guys iv not smoked and the bf as not even had one him self yet.. Feeling a bit better now.. He says he cares about me not smoking but always give me that but it's up too u speech.. Btw he smoking now can smell it tame door donuts told him I wAnt him smoke out the Gate

[nsd_user663_50109]

Thanks guys iv not smoked and the bf as not even had one him self yet.. Feeling a bit better now.. He says he cares about me not smoking but always give me that but it's up too u speech.. Btw he smoking now can smell it tame door donuts told him I wAnt him smoke out the Gate

Bloody phone suppost to say told him smoke out the gate As its stinking me kitchen and living room up

[AngryBear]

Hey Shelly

hope you're feeling a bit better today, I agree, he wants you to smoke so he doesn't feel bad himself! If my missus had said "it's up to you" in the first two weeks I'd have lit up like a shot so well done you!!

No-one smokes in our house now, my wife won't allow it! Put your foot down and turf him out into the garden

Anyway, as has been said, do you really want to go back to square one again? You've done so well, stay with it!

[nsd_user663_48461]

Morning Shelley

I hope your OK and feeling better. 80 days - you cannot let that go up in smoke - literally!! :eek:

Tell your OH how it is, and explain that you really need him to be sensitive of your circumstances.

It's dreadful when you get so far down and still struggle. Remember that it's just a psyche yearning, a false memory. Staring them down and waking up next day having not smoked is a wonderful feeling isn't it?.

And I promise you that very soon you'll just be occasionally aware of a "sensation" that you can just brush off! Stay strong, you've done so well.

[nsd_user663_26699]

Well said Karri! We shouldn't automatically assume ill-intent, nor expect the world to revolve around the quitter.

Well done Shelley for hanging in there and not caving in!

Alex.

[nsd_user663_50109]

Thanks guys.. No OH does want me smoke he always says in doing really well.. I was just miffed he got sun for his self when he only has half with a drink..

And I didn't cave in.. In not going to cave in I really do t want to be in day 1 again or smoking cuz I dont think I would be able to quit again knowing what I would have to go thru.. No thank you.. it's bin orrible and I'm only just getting it back together.

Tonight will be the ultimate test in going out with a load of smokers first time I will be out drinking with our and nicotine

[nsd_user663_46317]

Well done Shelly you're doing so well

Good luck tonight, you can do it girl

[Dippy_Egg]

To everyone else. Shelley said she had been feeling like this for a week so why blame her other half.

The whole world doesn't have to work around someone who has quit. All this making other family members have to change what they have always done when they smoke is wrong. If a choice is made to stop smoking it's your choice alone, others shouldn't have to change with you.

Ever thought that Shellies hubby said "it's up to you" because he loves her and hates seeing her unhappy. Not every smoker is the selfish "I want the world to smoke with me" loser you try to portray.

Karri. Are you afraid we might think that YOU are an "I want the world to smoke with me" loser? I'll be honest. A lots of your posts on here incline me to think that you are. If I were running this forum I'd be tempted to skoot you off it. I wonder who in particular this latest piece of vitriol was aimed at? Was the fag ash dropping onto your laptop as you angrily typed it? Either way......to their admirable credit not one of them rose to your bait. You must have been very disappointed just as you were the other day when the charming Kitkat was equally undrawn by your argument. None of these fine people need or want me to defend them........... I however need and want to do just that, for which I apologise wholely to them....but not to you.....and should the runners of this forum wish to skoot ME off it....then so be it.

PS wasnt it Shelley you virtually accused of lying about her gas leak yesterday?

[nsd_user663_26699]

Karri. Are you afraid we might think that YOU are an "I want the world to smoke with me" loser? I'll be honest. A lots of your posts on here incline me to think that you are. If I were running this forum I'd be tempted to skoot you off it. I wonder who in particular this latest piece of vitriol was aimed at? Was the fag ash dropping onto your laptop as you angrily typed it? Either way......to their admirable credit not one of them rose to your bait. You must have been very disappointed just as you were the other day when the charming Kitkat was equally undrawn by your argument. None of these fine people need or want me to defend them........... I however need and want to do just that, for which I apologise wholely to them....but not to you.....and should the runners of this forum wish to skoot ME off it....then so be it.

PS wasnt it Shelley you virtually accused of lying about her gas leak yesterday?

Hey Dippy, where on earth is that argument coming from? Karri is a long-standing member of this forum, and whether or not she has successfully quit or not is quite frankly none of your business, and whether or not you would "skoot" Karri off the forum if you ran the forum is irrelevant, because you don't run the forum. Like any other member, you owe it to everyone to be civil.

Alex.

[Unah]

Karri. Are you afraid we might think that YOU are an "I want the world to smoke with me" loser? I'll be honest. A lots of your posts on here incline me to think that you are. If I were running this forum I'd be tempted to skoot you off it. I wonder who in particular this latest piece of vitriol was aimed at? Was the fag ash dropping onto your laptop as you angrily typed it? Either way......to their admirable credit not one of them rose to your bait. You must have been very disappointed just as you were the other day when the charming Kitkat was equally undrawn by your argument. None of these fine people need or want me to defend them........... I however need and want to do just that, for which I apologise wholely to them....but not to you.....and should the runners of this forum wish to skoot ME off it....then so be it.

PS wasnt it Shelley you virtually accused of lying about her gas leak yesterday?

Totally agree Dippy.

[nsd_user663_26699]

I'm going to stand up to the plate here, and say that one of the very first posts I ever made here put me in hot water because a person posted a thread about how she was quitting and how one of her friends said "do whatever you want". The poster was expecting a mass reaction of support from the forum members and hatred against the nasty "friend" who was supposedly unsupportive.

My reaction was (and still is) that you need to own your quit, and that the friend was just being honest. Needless to say, many people disagreed.

The world doesn't revolve around you, and a true friend will tell you the truth, not just what you want to hear. That's my opinion, and I stick to it.

Alex.

[nsd_user663_20558]

Everyone is entitled to their opinion. I certainly see Karri's and Alex's point.

Speaking for myself, it wasn't my intention to demonise the still-smoking partners and friends of quitters, or imply that all of them were jealous and/or unsupportive. I quite agree that we are each responsible for our own quit.

However, Shelley was miserable and wavering, and felt that her partner (to roughly quote) didn't give a shit whether she smoked. So I said what I thought would have bolstered and encouraged me in such a situation. So bite me.

Shelley - sorry this has erupted on your thread. Hope you got through tonight's drinking OK!!

Helen

[nsd_user663_26699]

Everyone is entitled to their opinion. I certainly see Karri's and Alex's point.

Speaking for myself, it wasn't my intention to demonise the still-smoking partners and friends of quitters, or imply that all of them were jealous and/or unsupportive. I quite agree that we are each responsible for our own quit.

However, Shelley was miserable and wavering, and felt that her partner (to roughly quote) didn't give a shit whether she smoked. So I said what I thought would have bolstered and encouraged me in such a situation. So bite me.

Shelley - sorry this has erupted on your thread. Hope you got through tonight's drinking OK!!

Helen

Actually, what you said, Helen, was "I bet you he's just waiting for you to crack so he can feel better about himself".

That is the statement that Karri picked up on, and which I supported, but I understand that if you want to back-peddle, you're fully entitled to it.

It's about opinions, not truths, so bite me back!

Alex.

[nsd_user663_20558]

Oh for goodness' sake Alex, I'm not back pedalling. Had I felt like Shelley was feeling - which incidentally I did, at the beginning of my quit when my husband still smoked - it helped me to think that I had to stay strong just to show him that I could. I never felt he was trying to make me smoke, but I still galvanised myself by telling myself that his smoking wouldn't knock me off course.

Maybe it wasn't being entirely fair but it's human nature, no? And it helped. And actually, at times when I still smoked and my OH had stopped, I bloody did wish and hope he would start again, because I felt guilty about smoking when I didn't have the excuse of both of us doing it.

So I stick by what I said. a) I'm not implying every smoker is a bad person who has it in for us. b) I was just trying to give support.

And that is all I have to say.

[nsd_user663_50109]

Okay here goes iv decided next time I go out that will be tonight.. In taking my inhlatore thing with me.. As I'm so not ready to go our with sum form ov nicotine. I really don't want to take any nicotine at all but I Carnt stay in for ever. I'm fine drinking at home btw. But last night was suppost to be a fun night but I was so frigging miserable as everyone was smoking I was getting left on my own most the night why everyone went outside to smoke.. So I stupidly went outside to them as I was sick of being on me own and 5 tequilas later I had 3 puff.. I felt instantly better was smiling and felt happy.. Untill today now I feel upset. Iv let my self down. Feel like I'm never gonba beat it. I really want to tho as smoking vile..

[nsd_user663_50109]

I'm not going back to day 1 as they were the smalliest drags I had and i only half inhaled them. It's no excuse but if sum one said to me I have to go back to day one then I prob just start smoking again

[nsd_user663_50192]

I know how you feel; i went out yesterday and was dreading it, i told my oh that if i had a fag i was not to blame but the alchohol; didnt wash with him though, hes been given up 6 years, i smoked all through his quit and he never once made me feel guity but made me smoke outside which was fair enough.

I found it so hard to resist yesterday but somehow i did; my mates dont smoke so that made it alot easier for me.

I understand how you are feeling though and i dont think going back to day 1 is warrented, just think its like having a mars bar when your on a diet, you feel guilty all day but tomorrow you pick yourself up and have grapefriut for breakfast.

Amanda

[AngryBear]

It's no excuse but if sum one said to me I have to go back to day one then I prob just start smoking again

Shelly stop beating yourself up about it....a few puffs in 80 days does not make you a bad person or a failure, it's just a part of your quit, and, crowing though I was about being 50 days yesterday, I have seen a lot of posts on here that say that it makes no difference whether it was 1 day or 1001; the thing is to not smoke as best you can. I would hope to use that as and when I have a stumble!

If you really wanted to carry on you would have done, today?