I've given up: I can't do it any more. I've... - No Smoking Day

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I've given up

Unah profile image
Unah
28 Replies

I can't do it any more. I've just ruined my embroidery machine so that's going to cost me a fortune. I was so upset I went out and bought cigarettes.

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Unah profile image
Unah
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28 Replies
nsd_user663_20978 profile image
nsd_user663_20978

you can do this, the cigarettes are just getting you at you weak times and you are stronger than them now. Is having a cigarette going to fix your machine or make the slightest bit of difference to the situation infact yes it will cause you will have to spend money on cigarettes AND your machine

as we travel the road of quitting along the way mr nicotine is gonna just lay in wait for his perfect moment to pounce on you and he has today, so you need to brush him off throw those cancer sticks away stand up and say NO i am not falling for these tricks and mind games this is a blip and i am getting back on track so i can beat you for good mr nicotine

please dont quit quitting regroup and start again

boo

nsd_user663_20978 profile image
nsd_user663_20978

you quit on my birthday by the way

must be an omen that you have to keep going and be strong

boo

nsd_user663_24115 profile image
nsd_user663_24115

Be grateful its just your embroidery machine thats wrecked. iv just wrecked all of my meaningful relationships but no way am i reaching for a smoke. the longer u stay with this lapse the harder it will be to quit again, iv been there, i know. hope u stop asap. embroidery machines can be replaced, not so sure about lost health.

M

nsd_user663_45894 profile image
nsd_user663_45894

Aww just jump back on the wagon luv, nothin is that bad , comeon get back in here xxx

Unah profile image
Unah

Thank you to everyone for your encouragement. This wouldn't have happened if my sister hadn't phoned me TWICE. I've told her not to phone me as that is the worst time for me but I need to have the phone in case of emergencies. It is a big deal to me losing my machine. I'm a pensioner so can't afford a couple of thousand pounds for a new one.

I gave up in the hopes of emigrating to NZ to be with my family. Ive been making some pin money with the machine. I'm so tired of doing everything in my life alone.

nsd_user663_45894 profile image
nsd_user663_45894

Ohhhhhh Una , awww i just wanna get hold of you an give yer a massive hug :( i wish i could wave a majic wand for you and make it all better , and ya not alone doll, u have all us in here too talk too and support you, dont give in luv, just get back on ya quit and put this too bed eh, xxx

nsd_user663_24115 profile image
nsd_user663_24115

Looks like the only solution is to quit smoking again. save some money. then treat yourself to N.Z. the alternative is to carry on smoking all alone just fuming and miserable. I hope you find the strength.

Mx

nsd_user663_44157 profile image
nsd_user663_44157

I totally agree with Mash. If moneys tight why start spending more on fags, it just does not make sense.

Come on Una you have been doing well upto now jump back on board

nsd_user663_48461 profile image
nsd_user663_48461

Una - love - I feel wretched for you. But please, do jump back on board. Treat it as a slip/blip, not a failure. Your first quit attempt after all those years smoking, and you were doing so well, you said so yourself.

Get back on the wagon and head towards a smoke free sunset on the beach in NZ. :D

Shazza x

Dippy_Egg profile image
Dippy_Egg

This is so very sad Una. All I can do is attach my love along with everyone else's and pray that there is a way you can pick yourself up from this x :(

nsd_user663_36288 profile image
nsd_user663_36288

Oh I'm so sorry Una - I couldn't move on from this post without adding my hopes that you'll find a way to get through this. The smoke free future you want is out there - and not beyond your reach. Don't give up giving up.

Sue

x

nsd_user663_44684 profile image
nsd_user663_44684

Hi Una, So sorry to read how you're feeling :(

I've decided to leave quitting for a while, my head isn't in the right place - not sure it ever will be...

I really think i'm too depressed & anxious to do it right now :(

I wish you all the best & just quit again when you're ready :) I'm on my 5th quit & only lasted 3 days this time so you did really well for your first quit :) Most people don't quit on the first attempt so i'm sure you will do it when you're ready.

Denise x

Unah profile image
Unah

Thank you so much for all your messages. I don't know what I'm going to do at the moment. That machine was a lifeline for me and I can't get the parts. I bought it in America when I lived there and they don't even make it there anymore.

I came back here because my mum was ill and now I'm stuck. I've lived here for 2 1/2 years now and never talk to anyone. Going to the no smoking group was like a night out for me. I find it very depressing because everything reminds me of mum. I bought the house years ago to give her some security and now I'm stuck with it. My family are in NZ and Brazil. I need to get this house decorated so I can sell it and move to be near my grandchildren but I can no longer do the decorating on my own. If the ceilings weren't so high I could do it. I have looked into renting in NZ and it's very difficult if you smoke. It took me weeks to get myself into a frame of mind to quit and I was so happy about it. I wasn't even having a hard time with it until a couple of days ago when the patch fell off and I didn't realise it. Why they give you these patches and not the nicorettes which stick I don't know. The only person who phones me is my sister and I told her not to call as I always smoke on the phone. I turned it off for a week but realised that if I needed it, it wouldn't be charged. She phoned me twice within an hour and I was so agitated that I plugged the machine into the wrong part of the transformer. I had just got to thinking about how much money I was saving and I could pay someone to paint the ceilings for me. The rest I could manage. I thought it will only take a year and I'll be able to get this place in shape and with the family. Knowing I wouldn't be wasting all the money on cigarettes made it all seem possible.

Life has been pretty good to me on the whole. I've probably had a better life than most people. Ran away and married a sailor at 17, had 2 sons and lived in a lot of countries. Had hard times as well but mostly I had a happy life. I thought I was set for life until the banks stopped paying interest on savings. Now it just doesn't seem worth carrying on.

Thank you for letting me rant. I'll spend the next couple of days thinking what to do and see if I can pick myself up and start again. Best wishes to everyone.

nsd_user663_42763 profile image
nsd_user663_42763

Una :( i'm so sad to read that not only have you given up on quit smoking.. but on life?!

You have to remember that now is NOT FOREVER! Things will change whether you like it or not.. you are never stuck in one place even if it feels like you've been there for years

There is always always a way, can your sons help you? Or any family members? Can you not live with your sister?

Where do you live? :( let me save you! I cant stand to see someone so lovely and happy lose the will to live! xxxx

Unah profile image
Unah

Thank you. I don't tell my sons anything so they won't be able to help me. I've been independent all my life so no reason to start relying on anyone else now. Must admit I don't usually tell anyone anything. Can't believe I poured my heart out here. Just spoke to the kids on Skype. God I looked a wreck.

Well here goes. Tomorrow I start again. First thing is to buy some nicorette patches so I know they won't fall of and they're more comfortable.

I have searched the net for spares. I was on the net from the very first dial up so probably before some people on here were born. No luck.

It would be great to find someone, like me, who would do the job for pin money. Must be lots of them around but where do you find them????

Here's to Day 1 tomorrow :o

nsd_user663_24115 profile image
nsd_user663_24115

Hey Una ,heres a tip for the patches, they are presure responsive which means place them where u intend them to stick then press them on for a minute or longer ,that way they stay stuck. i used tofind it frustrating when mine fell off , even saw it as a sign to give up giving up. hope things get better for u soon. there is always hope even if its just a rumour of a glimmer. youve done the best thing by letting us know whats happening for u and already people are reaching out to help, every little helps. Another tip from me . self sufficiency suks iv been doing it all of my life and now im a miserable lonely old fart, we are not meant to be alone. u can sell your house without decorating it and i bet there is a machine for u gathering dust in someones garage, ask and ye shall receive. u have nowt to lose and everything to gain.

Mx

nsd_user663_44204 profile image
nsd_user663_44204

Go for it

Go for it Una when I gave up I took everything the Chemist offered me, went on the programme where you have too to the Chemist every week to blow into this machine for carbon monoxide and he will know if you've had a sly fag. I had the patches and the inhalator and bought some gum cos you can only have two things. I smoked for 50 years 15 a Day sometimes 20 so it hasn't been easy, have tried 4 or 5 times before but not as long as this quit 4 months tomorrow.

C,mon girl get back on track and be positive, join us n the Eg and Soldiers you will have a laugh speak to you soon Big Hugs xxxxx

Unah profile image
Unah

MX, This was my mothers house so it really needs bringing into the 21st centuary. I'm thinking of renting it because the time isn't right to sell. I used to be able to do it all myself but since I broke my hip I have a fear of ladders.

I do hold the patches on for about a minute but it still fell off and I couldn't figure out why I felt the urge :-)

nsd_user663_24115 profile image
nsd_user663_24115

AAAAhhhh now i understand why u need to decorate it. If your a pensioner you could apply to a charity and they will arrange for volunteers to decorate it maybe

Mash x

nsd_user663_47108 profile image
nsd_user663_47108

I do hold the patches on for about a minute but it still fell off and I couldn't figure out why I felt the urge :-)

Una,

this will sound flippant but believe me, it's not meant to be. I'm living your journey through your posts and my heart reaches out to you. I so want you to succeed.

Keeping the patches on. Do you have any surgical tape that you can wrap around your arm to keep the patches on? Or perhaps just sticky tape? Or a stretched out dead frog that you've put through a mangle? That should sort it.

NRT has really helped me so far. If you think that it can help you then use whatever means you can to keep the patches on. I've got a nail-gun you can borrow... :D

nsd_user663_49241 profile image
nsd_user663_49241

Una, I hope you can find the silver lining somewhere. You'll get there! A positive mindset can move mountains sometimes and let you see opportunities and avenues which were previously in the dark.

In terms of patches that stay on I recommend Nicotinell, the round ones. I had problems with the see through square ones they fell off all the time, but Nicotinell works well for me.

In regards to avoiding the phone, it has been advised by many stop smoking advisors that you adjust to the triggers rather than avoiding them completely. Your brain will rewire itself every time you use the trigger without a cigarette and it will get easier every time. If you leave it, you will not of had a chance to de-activate the trigger, e.g. break the association.

nsd_user663_46317 profile image
nsd_user663_46317

Go see your local council to see if there are any grants available, or alternatively, go to your local Citizens Advice Bureau. Depending on where you live, you might see me:)

Unah profile image
Unah

Where am I going to find a stretched out frog? I loved that :-)

I will buy other patches. I've used them for long haul flights and they stuck so well. It's only these square stiff ones that don't stick.

Lol, I hope I didn't give the impression I'm destitute. I wouldn't get a grant because I do have money in the bank. Just getting to the stage of being afraid my money will run out before I do :-(

Here goes day 2 again. I feel I never want to see a cigarette again. The thought of lighting one makes me feel sick. Don't know where that came from but I'm going to hold onto it.

Sorry if I was late with my reply but I forget to go to the second week. I'll remember in future. Thank you all.

Unah profile image
Unah

Forgot to answer about the phone. I have been tackling all the times when I smoke. The computer was the most important and the phone the least. I only have it for emergencies. I am not a phone person. I only used to phone my mum but since she died I haven't called anyone.

Skype and email suit me fine. When someone is going to skype they send an email first. Wouldn't do to get me coming out of the shower. NOT a pretty sight.

I don't have a problem phoning, only when I have to sit down and have a social conversation.

nsd_user663_45204 profile image
nsd_user663_45204

I really hope you get your machine fixed. I'm desperate for someone to alter my curtains. :)

Unah profile image
Unah

You don't need an embroidery machine to alter curtains. I've got a sewing machine. Send them round :-)

nsd_user663_45204 profile image
nsd_user663_45204

You don't need an embroidery machine to alter curtains. I've got a sewing machine. Send them round :-)

Ha ha it goes to show what i know about these sort of things. :)

Unah profile image
Unah

Why should you know. Don't suppose you do a whole lot of sewing :-)

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